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Mutombo to coach Rice Basketball next year?

Discussion in 'Houston Rockets: Game Action & Roster Moves' started by WhoMikeJames, Apr 3, 2008.

  1. WhoMikeJames

    WhoMikeJames Member

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    My friend who Goes to Rice, just told me he got an email from head of school talking about updates on Rice and etc. At the bottom of the email, there is a little note that says Rice has found a new coach for their basketball team, 4 time DPOY and world leader Dikembe Mutombo.

    He will send me the link later, but if this is true, congrats to Deke.

    and I doubt its an April Fools joke, considering its April 3rd.

    EDIT: heres the email

    Subject: [TFW] Message from the President's Office
    To: teamwiess@mailman.rice.edu

    Dear Rice Community Members,

    I am deeply disappointed to report that an entirely unacceptable act of criminal
    behavior occurred at the site of Duncan and McMurtry colleges last night. The
    Rice University Police Department is conducting a thorough investigation in
    cooperation with the Houston Police Department, but I wanted to express my own
    condemnation of such behavior and explain to the Rice community what the future
    holds for our university.

    At approximately 10:20 PM, RUPD alerted my office, the office of Dean Forman,
    and the Board of Trustees that the master construction plans and blueprints had
    been stolen from the office of Facilities, Engineering and Planning and the
    Construction Headquarters in South Campus, along with the most recent copies
    from several other on-campus buildings and a Palm Pilot with Development
    Supervisor Max Amery's construction contacts. Furthermore, many of the vehicles
    present in the Duncan-McMurtry construction site have been severely damaged and
    construction cannot continue at full speed until the vehicles have been
    replaced and the remainder of the site is inspected for damages. While it is
    currently unknown whether the perpetrators were affiliated with Rice, the
    estimated timing of the incidents combined with what appears to be an intimate
    knowledge of the university layout indicates that this crime may be the work of
    several students, staff members, or faculty working in cohesion.

    The university is conducting an investigation into the matter and we encourage
    anyone with information to contact Dean Forman's office. Your help will be
    kept confidential.

    While other copies of the construction plan exist, the Palm Pilot will prove to
    be extremely difficult to replace and the remaining construction plans are
    outdated. Last Tuesday, the Board of Trustees gave its full approval to
    changing the Vision for the Second Century's "Plan A" and allot $16 million to
    the renovation of both James A. Baker and William Rice colleges. The students
    housed in these colleges will be moved to Duncan and McMurtry Colleges,
    respectively. While this is exciting news that bodes well in our mission to
    strengthen the Rice legacy, tonight's events necessitate the extension of this
    plan by three years, until 2012. While I understand this news may upset many
    students, we must welcome our valiant construction workers with open arms until
    this project has reached completion.


    In unrelated news, I am proud to announce that four-time NBA Defensive Player of
    the Year and Houston Rockets center Dikembe Mutombo Mpolondo Mukamba
    Jean-Jacques Wamutombo has officially signed on as the coach of Rice
    University's men's basketball team. His extensive commitment to world activism,
    language education, and fair diplomacy will ensure that Rice remains a
    bridge-builder in a time of international struggle and expanding globalism. His
    seven-foot two-inch, two-hundred-and-sixty-pound frame will ensure that
    University of Houston coach Tom Penders will not survive the 2008-2009 season
    with both a victory over Rice and an intact pelvis.


    Love,
    David W. Leebron
    President
     
    #1 WhoMikeJames, Apr 3, 2008
    Last edited: Apr 3, 2008
  2. GermanRoxFan

    GermanRoxFan Member

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    1. he'll play for the rockets next season.
    2. he has no coaching experience.
    3. nobody would understand him anyways. :p
     
  3. EbolaScola

    EbolaScola Member

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    1. yes
    2. yes
    3. YES!
     
  4. dafranchise0309

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    hahha who just saw charles barkley chop up dikembe during the halftime show of tonights game...haha it was soo funny..
     
  5. Carl Herrera

    Carl Herrera Member

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    Did Yao hook him up with that job?

    I don't know what rice basketball is and how it's different from meat-and-potatoes baskeball. But I am sure Chinese people love rice basketball.
     
  6. thatboyz

    thatboyz Member

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    i go to rice too, and i got that e-mail as well...weird??
     
  7. brantonli24

    brantonli24 Member

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    Does the President usually end his emails with:
    Love,
    David W. Leebron
    President

    Because if he does, then.....lol I just find it weird. But I hope it's not true though, I'd love to have Deke back again next season, he's a perfect role model for other players to follow.
     
  8. shastarocket

    shastarocket Member

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    Lol, thats awesome.

    RUCK FICE!!!
     
  9. levintblack

    levintblack Member

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    Someone hacked into the President's email. The whole thing isn't written well and like a President and any President would be canned for sending an eemail to students that said:

    University of Houston coach Tom Penders will not survive the 2008-2009 season
    with both a victory over Rice and an intact pelvis.
     
  10. askball

    askball Member

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    man Rice is in disarray
     
  11. badgerfan

    badgerfan Member

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    Not to mention "we must welcome our valiant construction workers with open arms until this project has reached completion."

    Seriously, you guys didn't think this was for real, did you?

    Nice e-mail though. My hat's off to whoever sent that.
     
  12. rofflesaurus

    rofflesaurus Member

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    this has to be a joke. mutombo just barely made up his mind that he might come back next season. does he even know how to coach?
     
  13. Ziggy

    Ziggy QUEEN ANON

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    Thats hilarious. Not even Clutch could think up an April Fools joke of that magnitude.
     
  14. theogcasey

    theogcasey Member

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    HAAHAHAHAHAHA! I kinda hope that's really his full name. It's quite fitting and probably translates to "Badass."
     
  15. EbolaScola

    EbolaScola Member

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    It really is his full name.
     
  16. The Drake

    The Drake Member

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    haha, guys you've been had.

    I know the guy that wrote that email...he lives directly 3 floors above me.
     
  17. The Drake

    The Drake Member

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    Besides, rumor has it, Trent Johnson (current HC at Stanford) will take over at Rice next year.
     

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