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Joke Time Again

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by giddyup, Sep 15, 2004.

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  1. giddyup

    giddyup Member

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    A man met a beautiful lady and he decided he wanted to marry her right away.

    She protested, "But we don't know anything about each other."

    He replied, "That's all right; we'll learn about each other as we go
    along."

    So she consented, and they were married, and went on a honeymoon to a very nice resort.

    One morning, they were lying by the pool when he got up off his towel, climbed up to the 10 meter board and did a two and a half tuck gainer, entering the water perfectly, almost without a ripple. This was followed by a three rotations in jackknife position before he again straightenedout and cut the water like a knife. After a few more demonstrations, he came back and lay down on his towel.

    She said, "That was incredible!"

    He said, "I used to be an Olympic diving champion."

    You see, I told you we'd learn more about ourselves as we went along."

    So she got up, jumped in the pool and started doing laps.

    She was moving so fast that the froth from her pushing off at one end of the pool would hardly be gone before she was already touching the other end of the pool.

    She did laps in freestyle, breast stroke, even butterfly!

    After about thirty laps, completed in mere minutes, she climbed back out and lay down on her towel, barely breathing hard.

    He said, "That was incredible! Were you an Olympic endurance swimmer?"

    "No, she said, 'I was a hooker in Memphis and I worked both sides of the Mississippi River."
     
  2. Fatty FatBastard

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    Threads about my ex-wife are not nice, giddyup.
     
  3. Lil Pun

    Lil Pun Member

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    LOL!!! :D
     
  4. HAYJON02

    HAYJON02 Member

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    edit: deleted. great joke but i dont want anyone really disturbed or crying
     
  5. PhiSlammaJamma

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    Why are New Yorkers always so depressed? Because the light at the end of the tunnel is New Jersey.
     
  6. droxford

    droxford Member

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    Why do most husbands die before their wives?

    ...

    because they want to

    -- droxford
     
  7. Franchise2001

    Franchise2001 Contributing Member

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    Why do women get PMS?

    ...


    because they deserve it
     
  8. Isabel

    Isabel Member

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    Menopause, menstrual cramps, mental breakdown...

    all our problems begin with Men.
     
  9. m_cable

    m_cable Member

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    Here's another man joke that I heard a few years ago.

    "If a man speaks in the forest and a woman isn't around to hear it, is he still wrong?"

    To be honest, I'm not even sure who this joke is supposed to be making fun of.
     
  10. OrangeCountyCA

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    here's a joke I heard on "Late Night with Conan O'Brian".

    Here's a sample SAT Analogies:
    A physicist is to "What goes up must come down."
    as:
    Paris Hilton is to "I must go down on what comes up."

    Sorry, I'm not so good at telling jokes.
     
  11. El Toro

    El Toro Member

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    What do you call four Mexicans in quicksand?


    cuatro cinco.


    :D
     
  12. SWTsig

    SWTsig Member

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    Yes!
     

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