1. Welcome! Please take a few seconds to create your free account to post threads, make some friends, remove a few ads while surfing and much more. ClutchFans has been bringing fans together to talk Houston Sports since 1996. Join us!

Joke So Funny or Sarcastic? That Only D and D'rs Can Handle It.

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout: Debate & Discussion' started by glynch, Mar 21, 2007.

Tags:
  1. glynch

    glynch Member

    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2000
    Messages:
    18,105
    Likes Received:
    3,612
    A small town zoo in the South pooled its meager cash and bought one female and one male guerilla with the intent of breeding them.

    Shortly after they arrived the male died before impregnating the female.

    After assessing the meager resources of the small town zoo, the Board decided to place a want ad in the local paper. "Wanted man to impregnate female guerilla for $500."



    Finally a local redneck came forward and said: "I'll do it , but only with the following conditions.

    1) No kissing.
    2) I can close my eyes.
    3) All off-spring must be raised as Southern Baptists.
    and
    4) I get 2 weeks to raise the $500.
     
  2. El_Conquistador

    El_Conquistador King of the D&D, The Legend, #1 Ranking

    Joined:
    Jun 11, 2002
    Messages:
    15,784
    Likes Received:
    6,698
    Let's see, let's offend:

    1) Whites by calling them rednecks
    2) Christians by implying that only idiots are Christians

    Gotta love the Democratic platform these days...
     
  3. DaDakota

    DaDakota Balance wins
    Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 1999
    Messages:
    129,589
    Likes Received:
    40,155
    Gotta love not being able to laugh at a joke.

    BRILLIANT !!

    DD
     
  4. Sishir Chang

    Sishir Chang Member

    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2000
    Messages:
    11,064
    Likes Received:
    8
    Yeah Howard Dean officially wrote that joke into the Democratic platform.. :rolleyes:
     
  5. Zac D

    Zac D Member

    Joined:
    Jul 8, 2000
    Messages:
    2,733
    Likes Received:
    46
    No, no, no.

    Southern whites.
     
  6. StupidMoniker

    StupidMoniker I lost a bet

    Joined:
    Jul 18, 2001
    Messages:
    16,213
    Likes Received:
    2,845
    It was a little funny, I chuckled.
     
  7. glynch

    glynch Member

    Joined:
    Dec 1, 2000
    Messages:
    18,105
    Likes Received:
    3,612
    It must be hell to be a right winger and have the additional disability of being humor challenged as well.

    As a leftist, with a bleeding heart, I can nevertheless pity a poor soul with two such overwhelming disabiities.

    He is not responsible for such disabilties. I suspect causation is due to a combination of dysfunctinal upbringing and perhaps genetics. Of course teasing out the relative weight of these two or perhaps additional causal factors is beyond the scope of a brief post.
     
  8. nyquil82

    nyquil82 Member

    Joined:
    Oct 30, 2002
    Messages:
    5,174
    Likes Received:
    3
    Do we need more black obama jokes for the KKKonservatives here?
     
  9. Two Sandwiches

    Joined:
    Feb 6, 2002
    Messages:
    23,139
    Likes Received:
    15,080
    The real debate isn't about whether the joke offends or not. It's about why a guerrilla is being put in a zoo. When was the last time you saw a person in a zoo? What has this world come to if we can't even have animals in zoos and need to buy people for display?

    Also, if this woman truly was a guerrilla, I'd hope the Patriot Act would catch her before she infiltrated our zoos. Otherwise, this law is pointless!
     
  10. basso

    basso Member
    Supporting Member

    Joined:
    May 20, 2002
    Messages:
    33,475
    Likes Received:
    9,348
    my brother sent me this yesterday, which i then forwarded to one of my bleeding heart friends:

    [rquoter]
    One day a fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their fathers did for a living.

    All the typical answers came up -- fireman, mechanic, businessman, salesman, doctor, lawyer, and so forth. However, little Justin was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the teacher prodded him about his father, he replied, "My father's an exotic dancer in a gay cabaret and takes off all his clothes in front of other men and they put money in his underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really good, he will go home with some guy and stay with him all night for money."

    The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other children to work on some exercises and then took little Justin aside to ask him, "Is that really true about your father?"


    "No," the boy said, "He works for the Democratic National Committee and is helping to get Hillary Clinton to be our next President, but I was too embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."[/rquoter]

    and my friend's response:

    [rquoter]I'm sorry, but I find this offensive and hope you will have more respect for me in the future. I have, with great difficulty refrained from giving you my opinion on the course of the Bush administration, the war etc. I don't think it serves any good purpose except to drive a wedge between us.[/rquoter]
     
  11. Colt45

    Colt45 Member
    Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2000
    Messages:
    3,234
    Likes Received:
    3,012
    Huh. Based on reality, I figured the punch-line was going to be that the kid was the son of well-known cross-dresser, Rudy Giuliani. That would have been infinitely more funny as it would have a basis in reality. Then again, based on baghdad basso's pathetic attempts at humor in the past (anybody remember his uproarious intentional mis-spelling of iRaq [it's kinda like iPod!]?) this is not surprising. If baghdad basso was even half as funny as he believes he is, he'd be twice as funny as he actually is.

    At least he can admit that the offense his fellow traveller, Skippy, took at the joke is a sign of just how far the neocons have fallen. Why, he even used his token libpig friend as a comparison!

    He even credited the originator of the joke instead of blatantly plagiarizing as he did with the one about a fight between God and satan like he did a couple of weeks ago.
     
  12. Colt45

    Colt45 Member
    Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Feb 8, 2000
    Messages:
    3,234
    Likes Received:
    3,012
    As this is Skippy we're talking about here, the causation is most assuredly menstrual.
     
  13. Sishir Chang

    Sishir Chang Member

    Joined:
    Nov 12, 2000
    Messages:
    11,064
    Likes Received:
    8
    I have this theory that conservatives can't do humor that well while liberals can't do outrage that well. Conservative humor seems to feel forced and flat while liberal outrage is whiny and shrill.
     
  14. vlaurelio

    vlaurelio Member

    Joined:
    Jan 26, 2005
    Messages:
    21,310
    Likes Received:
    11,755
    are all whites rednecks?

    are all christians idiots?
     
  15. Jugdish

    Jugdish Member

    Joined:
    Mar 27, 2006
    Messages:
    9,110
    Likes Received:
    9,644
    It's gorilla, you rednecks.
     
  16. robbie380

    robbie380 ლ(▀̿Ĺ̯▀̿ ̿ლ)
    Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Aug 16, 2002
    Messages:
    24,004
    Likes Received:
    11,192
    that was driving me crazy too.


    and i just didn't think the joke was funny. :( ...but if was about the blacks or the mexicans or the jews then i would have been rolling!!!! ollololololllollolllollololol

    ;)
     
  17. Rockets2K

    Rockets2K Clutch Crew

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2000
    Messages:
    18,050
    Likes Received:
    1,271
    AAAhhhhhh


    aint that special??

    Lil Jorgie faking outrage at a joke made about people whom he despises in the first place.

    Funnily enough, I'd wager he and basso have no problem with jokes aimed at minorities.

    for the record, THIS redneck got a chuckle out of it...especially the line about taking two days to raise the 500.

    carry on.
     
  18. cson

    cson Member

    Joined:
    Jul 22, 2000
    Messages:
    3,797
    Likes Received:
    29
    I despise the people cited in the joke.
    I hate Christians and White people.
    I am offended, however, as it was not funny.
     
  19. plcmts17

    plcmts17 Member

    Joined:
    Nov 4, 2003
    Messages:
    3,777
    Likes Received:
    179
    Women faking orgasms is more authentic than conservative "outrage" will ever be.
     
  20. Party Pizza

    Party Pizza Member

    Joined:
    Mar 31, 2006
    Messages:
    299
    Likes Received:
    0
    3) Republican Gorilla Impregnators
     

Share This Page