I've got an issue I was hoping u all can help understand

He was a jerk
who like to exert their will and show their power over
so called weaker people

It was a power play. . pure and simple
Guy like him need their asses kick
mainly to show them . . .that they are really not ****
they full of ****
and they need to learn that ., .,had he approached the
WRONG guy . . he'd be sleeping with the fishes

sometimes folx need to be taught manors

and I just love the . . ."YOU DON'T LOOK HANDICAPPED"
like you have to PROVE your disability to HIM
WHO THE HELL IS HE????

Rocket River

 

The guy was being a total and complete ass. I wouldn't say that to anyone or behave that way.

However...

Do you experience any pain when walking a long distance? Is it absolutley necessary to use the handicapped thing or just a convenience?

My mother-in-law has had numerous back surgeries. If anyone should use her handicapped tags, it would be her. But, most of the time, she chooses to leave those spots to people who have severe pain, significant disabilites when walking or those in wheelchairs.

If you don't REALLY need the spot, the common courteous thing to do is to leave it to someone who does. Even if no one uses it, it is the right thing to do. If you have a legitimate problem and need to be close to the entrance, fine. That's what the tags are for. However, if you don't and it was just to make your parking more convenient, you probably should park elsewhere.

 

You know, a lot of people who have handicap parking permits don't have an obvious physical impairment that one could see just by taking a glance. It's really going overboard to assume that just because you can't see the ailment (a limp or a wheelchair), the ailment doesn't exist.

But yeah, if you don't really need it anymore, you really shouldn't be using it.

 

yeah, what a dick; standing up for handicap people who could've possibly been screwed over because rocketteen was too impatient or too lazy to find a spot further away. we certainly need fewer of his kind around -- let's kick all their asses...

if you've ever had to help a handicapped person out a car (and i bet this guy has), you know what a convienence those spots are and that they shouldn't be abused by people who can get along without them. no offense, rocketteen, but you abused it. as long as the guy approached you initially with some degree of tact, i don't think you really have a beef.

 

I have a friend who did the same thing. He had knee surgery but used his handicap tags longer than he really needed them. I gave him some grief over it. He gave the excuse that other people did the same thing.

That's the wrong question though. What people need to ask themselves is: what is the right thing to do? I admit that I haven't been in your situation and that I would be tempted to do the same thing - but after being temporarily handicapped you should feel some sympathy for those who are permanently handicapped and might need that space.

 

Yeah Ric. As a matter of fact, I think we should take away the ability of physicians to prescribe handicap parking permits and let guys waiting for tables in restaurants decide who looks disabled enough to need the space.

Screw those folks with heart ailments or back problems, etc whose doctors have prescribed them a parking permit and told them not to exert themselves. If you don't have a limp or a wheelchair, you gotta walk.

There are people who don't look to be disabled who actually are. And certainly, you should give as much grief as possible to someone who may have just had open-heart surgery after a heart attack when they get out of their car after parking in a handicap spot (with a valid handicap parking permit). That's the issue to me. How does this guy know what a "handicapped" person looks like?

Sure, Rocketteen doesn't really have a beef (he was apparently abusing the permit), but it's not the guy waiting for a table's job to decide who is or isn't handicapped. Just because he can't see it, doesn't mean it's not there.

I've read other stories from people who actually do have relatively severe medical problems who have gotten serious grief from passers-by for parking in handicapped spots (despite having legal handicapped permits). Just because you can't see the back brace or see their weak heart or see the degenerative spine condition or see the partial amputations of the foot or whatever on the outside doesn't mean it's not there.

Are there plenty of people who have abused the handicapped parking system? Sure. Does that mean it's time for everyone to turn vigilante and make sure whoever uses those spaces is truly and obviously handicapped (hey, I know a guy who can give anybody a permanent limp for the right price.....)? Not in my opinion. Just because you can't see the disability doesn't mean it's not there.

 

i think you were totally right... if I was you I would have stepped up to the guy, but that's just b/c I'm a confrontational fool

it's sad that we still have bully-types as adults as well!

 

Next time, just walk away. If he did work for the fire dept, he should have known better than to say anything. I work in public service also (corrections) and believe me, he was told that he was not qualified or trained to enforce any laws whatsoever and should refrain from doing so. If you have a valid pass issued to you, you are doing nothing illegal. You are not a doctor, just because your knee feels fine doesn't mean it is, so don't feel guilty.

 

so, ryan, you agree with rocket river: people with the gall to ask about someone's handicap under such suspicious circumstances should have their asses kicked? come on.

as long as he handled it tactfully, he shouldn't have to apologize for asking; i'm guessing somone close to him is handicapped and that it's a sensitive issue for him. and i have no doubt, had rocketteen given a legitimate excuse (he didn't, btw), the guy would've apologized and gone about his business. i mean, let's not blow this thing out of proportion; the guy wasn't leading a gaggle of towns folk with torches and pitchforks. he asked a question for all the right reasons.

no, you're right: it's the job of the handicap parking police....

my cousin has spina bifoda, and i can tell you my awareness of this kind of activity is heightened, primarily because there's no one in 95% of our parking lots to enforce it. no one. so, yeah, i do find myself checking people who use the handicap spot, because i picture her having to wheel in from a less advantageous spot and it drives me crazy that people could be so insensitive.

 

I think this is what it boils down to, I mean people can think their surgery is all "better" but it may not be. Your handicap parking permit is issued for a reason, for you to use it the length it is recomended. If you use it longer, shame on you, but trust me its not worth the risk to reinjure yourself becuase of what one person thinks. The guy was out of line, plain and simple.

I recently had surgery and thought I was "feeling" better, so I did a few things that the doc told me to avoid, well my recovery time went from 4 weeks to 2 months because I thought I felt fine. dont risk it over some jacka** who is on a power trip.

 

I didn't say he should have his ass kicked (and for the record, I don't think Rocket River and I have ever agreed on anything

No, but after being told why Rocketteen was parking in the handicapped zone (he had knee surgery and offered to show the scars from it), the man persisted. Had he simply wanted an explanation, that's one thing. He wanted to persist, and he apparently wanted to waste the time of the fire department by calling them in to check out the perfectly legal parking permit.

It drives me crazy that people can be so insensitive, too, but it's also not my job to check everybody's medical records who parks in a handicapped spot. My father deals in pain management, and there several of his patients who genuinely need the handicapped parking permit, but who do not have an obvious impairment when viewed from the outside. Why should those patients have to explain themselves to someone who can't imagine that there actually are people who have ailments that require a handicapped parking permit but that just cannot be seen (and I notice that you, too, apparently automatically assume that any ailment that cannot be seen by the naked eye is not an ailment at all).

And to persist even after being told what the deal is and threatening to waste the time of the authorities just because the guy didn't like the answer is over the line. And that's certainly not being tactful. Tactful would've been questioning and then leaving it alone (if he felt the need to question at all). Needling someone (a someone who may well have had a heart ailment that excess stress can aggravate for all this guy knows) is beyond the line.

One thing I've heard mentioned elsewhere is the idea of splitting up handicapped parking and requiring part of it to be wheelchair only and the other part being regular handicapped spaces. For one thing, the wheelchair only spaces often need to be bigger (often bigger than what it available now) in order to get the chair in the proper place and get the person in it (or those that have a van lift would obviously need larger spaces). Seems to me to be a pretty good idea...

 

Abusing a handicap parking permit when there is nothing wrong with you physically, is completely wrong.

If you are using it because of pain or other issues, then I say park away.

This was an isolated case, where this guy was pissed and obviously completely bitter about something that has happened to him or someone close to him.

 

Personally, I had knee surgery and didn't get a handicap permit because a substantial part of the handicap spot is its size; extracting a wheelchair often takes more space. I didn't care how much farther I had to go with crutches. I just always am thankful that none of my loved ones are in a wheelchair and I will go out of my way to accomodate those who are.

JMHO.

 

He was wrong in the way he discussed it with you. First of all he has no business saying "you dont look handicapped". Ummm....hey wise guy, not all handicap people look "handicap". You aren't totally right either though. If you dont feel any pain you should throw away that sticker right now. Why cant people be nice to one another? If he felt so strongly about this topic he could have nicely explained to you. I am sure you would of understood then. Yelling is the worst thing to do in these kind of situations.

 

I thought it was illegal to park in a handicapped spot if you weren't handicapped, regardless of whether or not you had a tag.

 

Funny thing is I had similar experiences but just in an opposite direction. I had a fairly substantial back injury when I was in my early 20's. I was essentially unable to walk easily for about a year. I could not stand up straight and literally walked bent in half like someone with osteoparosis. I had nearly constant pain in my lower back and legs and walking that way was exceedingly embarrassing.

On several occassions, I had people say things like, "What's the matter with you?" "Why do you walk funny?" "What the hell happened to you?" "What's wrong with your back?" and other equally friendly things.

Because of my embarrassment and the pain in my back, I ignored them and just tried to be polite but, to this day, it just freakin' galls me that people would actually say that to a total stranger.

In your experience, the guy was a complete ******* for one simple reason: he had NO idea what your handicap was. By initiating a strong verbal confrontation with you, he paid no mind or respect to your problems. I just don't get how people can do that to other people and think it is ok. It pisses me off.

 

i think you and that dude are total DICKS, just because there were more handicap parking places doesnt make it okay for someone who doesnt REALLY need it to park there.