Intelligent Design, Darwin now 1 more must be taught.

I find it disgraceful that you would use this crisis in education to fuel the agenda of the worshippers of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. What next, we'll all have to eat spaghetti every night? This should be stopped before it goes too far....fanaticism is never good.

 

Blasphemy! Everyone knows the universe was created by Her Ineffable, Invisible Pinkness! May the Invisible Pink Unicorn have mercy on your soul!

 

Then even nothingness was not, nor existence.
There was no air then, nor the heavens beyond it.
Who covered it? Where was it? In whose keeping?
Was there then cosmic water, in depths unfathomed?
But, after all, who knows, and who can say,
Whence it all came, and how creation happened?
The gods themselves are later than creation,
So who knows truly whence it has arisen?

 

Before time began there was no heaven, no earth and no space between. A vast dark ocean washed upon the shores of nothingness and licked the edges of night. A giant cobra floated on the waters. Asleep within its endless coils lay the Lord Vishnu. He was watched over by the mighty serpent. Everything was so peaceful and silent that Vishnu slept undisturbed by dreams or motion.

From the depths a humming sound began to tremble, Om. It grew and spread, filling the emptiness and throbbing with energy. The night had ended. Vishnu awoke. As the dawn began to break, from Vishnu's navel grew a magnificent lotus flower. In the middle of the blossom sat Vishnu's servant, Brahma. He awaited the Lord's command.

Vishnu spoke to his servant: 'It is time to begin.' Brahma bowed. Vishnu commanded: 'Create the world.'

A wind swept up the waters. Vishnu and the serpent vanished. Brahma remained in the lotus flower, floating and tossing on the sea. He lifted up his arms and calmed the wind and the ocean. Then Brahma split the lotus flower into three. He stretched one part into the heavens. He made another part into the earth. With the third part of the flower he created the skies.

The earth was bare. Brahma set to work. He created grass, flowers, trees and plants of all kinds. To these he gave feeling. Next he created the animals and the insects to live on the land. He made birds to fly in the air and many fish to swim in the sea. To all these creatures, he gave the senses of touch and smell. He gave them power to see, hear and move.

The world was soon bristling with life and the air was filled with the sounds of Brahma's creation.


or if you prefer...

The suns were the ten children of Di Jun, the god of the eastern sky. Each morning one of the suns would rise, climb into a chariot pulled by a dragon, and ride across the sky bringing light to the different parts of the world. In this way the earth got the right amount of sunshine, at the different seasons of the year.

But the ten suns grew bored. They wanted to work together and, one day, they woke early and rode across the sky together in their chariots.

The Earth hated it. It burnt. It cracked. The rivers ran dry. Animals and people grew weak with the heat. But the ten suns were enjoying themselves and would not listen to those who asked them to stop. They laughed and carried on riding around the sky.


Even their father, Di Jun, had no influence over them. To save the world he sent for the Divine Archer and gave him a magic bow ...

The Archer flew on the wind, down to the highest mountain he could see. He had nine arrows in his quiver and, one by one, he shot an arrow at each of the suns. As each arrow struck, the sun exploded and turned into a bird.

By the end of the day, only one sun remained. Next day he rose again and his sad tears filled the rivers and made the plants grow again. And that is the sun we see today.

or perhaps...

Earthmaker began to think about what he should do and in the end he began to cry, tears flowing from his eyes and falling down to where they became bright objects, seas formed from his tears.

Earthmaker thought, 'Anything I wish will happen just as I wish it'.

He wished for light - it happened.

He wished for earth and earth was formed.

Speaking for the first time, he said 'I shall make a being like myself' and he took some earth and made it just like himself.

He spoke to the creature, but it gave no answer. He looked closely, saw it had no mind and made a mind for it. But when he spoke to it, still it did not answer.

He made it a tongue and spoke to it, but still it did not answer.

He saw it had no soul, so he made it a soul, and talked to it ... and it very nearly said something, but failed to make itself understood.

So Earthmaker breathed into its mouth and spoke to it ... and it answered.

 

Let's take a vote!!!

 

and the winner is

# Christianity: 2.1 billion
# Islam: 1.3 billion
# Secular/Nonreligious/Agnostic/Atheist: 1.1 billion
# Hinduism: 900 million
# Chinese traditional religion: 394 million
# Buddhism: 376 million
# primal-indigenous: 300 million
# African Traditional & Diasporic: 100 million
# Sikhism: 23 million
# Juche: 19 million
# Spiritism: 15 million
# Judaism: 14 million
# Baha'i: 7 million
# Jainism: 4.2 million
# Shinto: 4 million
# Cao Dai: 4 million
# Zoroastrianism: 2.6 million
# Tenrikyo: 2 million
# Neo-Paganism: 1 million
# Unitarian-Universalism: 800 thousand
# Rastafarianism: 600 thousand
# Scientology: 500 thousand

Given the last two Presidential elections, the following candidate has demanded a recount...