I mean, i dig a lot of stuff...art..music...bbq hangouts. I love life and feel blessed everyday to be alive and have all my limbs and such. I dont make that much money and feel like im at a job with no future but feel valued by this small company. I mean i get paid close to 40k but worry that I never got a fancy degree. Ive recently been living the single life and having casual sex a lot but dont feel empty or nothing like that. Really cool stuff but obviously doing it safe. Anyway, am I wasting my life? I feel happy but then feel this weird guilt like im not suppose to be doing all this...its like a voice telling me....be a dad...be pursuing something higher than your personal needs. I mean, I dunno, I volunteer my time and donate money and stuff. I help my folks here and there and dont really hurt anyone..other than the girls i dont call the next day . Not showing off just saying....should I just accept that this is my life? I hate school and would hate to be trapped like in a corporate environment and stuff. I just want to keep life as basic as possible. I like having a used car and no credit cards and just avoiding owning a home. The reason I ask..is because most people feel complete.....being married..sharing their life...owning a home..having kids..etc...normal and fulfilling. Am I wasting my life? I just have this weird fear of being an old dude with no one around and with no home to call my own. The future is scary, no?
How old are you? Pretty much everyone goes through this I think, sows their wild oats, then settles down.
Well thats the problem..i dont ever see myself settling down...not saying its out of the norm or some crazy radical idea....just saying! I know its about self perception and junk. But do people with established and common lives see people like me like im wasting my life just being selfish? and not sharing myself with a wife and not making babies and stuff. in general, is that a wasted life? cause all i think about is myself?
Would help to know how old you are. Nothing wrong with a simple life, probably less stressful. I hope you are at least thinking about how you will provide for yourself when you retire, be responsible. As for marriage, marriage is for companionship, it's not for the Kodak moments, the vacations, graduations, Hallmark holidays, it's someone to share the mundane the boring parts of life and make them seem a little more fulfilled.
I can do boring all by myself. So many entertainment options....artificial maybe?But close to my 30s. I guess i bring it up cause my parents have quizzed me about when im going to get back on the saddle again...since my last awful relationship. I tell them.......i dont think i ever want to. They just seem puzzled...since they are so old school and such.
I think some people see it that way, for sure. But I think "settling down" and "wasted life" are two separate issues. You can have a life that contributes to the world without getting married and having kids. What are your goals? Aspirations? Do you want to achieve anything more? You must be if you are making this post. I'm a little bit like you. I'm single, having fun, have no interest in a house...difference is I know I want to get married and have kids eventually.
You are different from everyone else, none of us are the same. We all have a different pasts and personalities, what you might find fun is different than what others might. Just because its common for people to get married and have kids that doesn't mean you have to. If you enjoy living the single life and doing what you do then don't stop. Don't try and mold yourself into someone your not just because it's how the typical American is portrayed.
Goals? Aspirations? That is where my dilemma is! I don't really have any.....start a small business where I can I don't have to depend on anyone else? But I see other people fail at this so many times...that I get complacent and fearful of even trying. I know, I sound like a wimp.
Don't let the world define happiness for you. There are a lot of people who are married, have important careers, a big house with children, and couldn't be more miserable. A lot of people go through a selfish phase where they're just are not ready for marriage and things like that and then eventually they mature but then again some people just aren't meant for that kind of life. It's up to you to figure out what makes you happy by living your own life, not the life people would have for you.
GUYS, forget this. I'm drunk and reflecting on dumb crap. I will wake up and grimace over this. My bad. Eight beers strong here! This is probably like the 547th thread about such a topic. Thanks anyway.
That's father material right there, son... Seriously, it's okay to take some risks. What do you want to start a business on? Can you plan it out? Are you willing to work twice as much? What are your fallbacks? The best part of not having anyone depend on you is that you can **** up royally and have the ability to recover. Writing stuff down is also good. That's where the paragraphs come in, so you don't realize that you're a dumbass when you read it again later on.
I think you ultimately determine if you're wasting your life by considering how you want to be remembered, and in some ways, how happy you feel on a consistent basis, not just day to day. For me, I feel like I'm wasting my life if my actions aren't influencing my decisions and thinking for the following days, weeks and years. I'm very analytical, as far as my career is concerned. If I'm unable to "reach" my students and help them achieve all that they possibly can, I'm wasting away. If I'm unhappy in my job and not progressing, I'm wasting my life. Fortunately, I've found a happy medium. I think this question also goes to your personal life. Are the people in your life making you strive to live each day? Are you happy with yourself? It's so subjective. What I do know is that money shouldn't define your life. The relationships and positive impact you leave with friends, family, your wife, kids, etc... means more than anything. In turn, it usually makes you happy to live and coexist with a functioning society. You're doing great, sport. :grin:
Yeah...well my opinion is you should have some goals and aspirations. It doesn't have to be marriage and family, but it should be something. I mean, what do you care about?
