Houston High Schools

i take serious exception to the cracks on Stratford.

 

oh my god, that is so damn true.

 

That's so funny... True, but funny...

 

I went to Katy and sadly every word of that is true. Except that we're good at football because of steroids...

 

I fixed this, that format was killing my eyes.

Memorial High School
I live in one of the richest parts of Houston and my house is the size of a Dinosaur. If I am a girl I drive a Mercedes or BMW, if I am a guy I drive a Tahoe or some other kind of large SUV. We are like Bellaire and Lamar times 10. Our school is about as diverse as an Abercrombie catalogue and looks just like it. We party every weekend because we are rich, bored and have nothing else better to do with our lives. Our football team is pretty good and Roger Clemens' son went here I think. We say we have the "hottest girls in Houston" and we mean it. Our mascot is the same as the ultimate snob college: SMU. I am a Mustang.


Katy,Taylor and Cinco High Schools
I live in an area that is really nice but its cheap as hell. Our parents could not afford to live in Memorial or Bellaire. I might drive a car that is worth more than my house. We are considered "hicks" by the inner houston kids. If im a girl I am blonde and will probably have skin cancer really soon. Our football team is among the best in the nation due to D-ball and other steroids. We have field parties and everyone gets laid. If im a guy, i love to get in fights. If
I'm a girl I love to sleep with my best friends bf. I am a Tiger.


St. Thomas High School
I am probably white and preppy or I drive a big truck and pretend to be a cowboy. My truck has a lift and giant wheels even though I live in River Oaks. My granddaddy, my dad, my uncle and my brothers went to St. Thomas, I couldnt go anywhere else or I would be dead. We act like homosexuals, but if you show any signs of actual homosexualityyou are as good as dead. We go to football games, but we don't cheer or give a **** because our team sucks and all we are interested ins meeting girls. I haven't seen a minority in years. I hate fish, I lovebeer. I am an Eagle.

St. Pius X High School
Even though I am probably white and middle class, I pretend to act like a prep or a cowboy. I am neither because I can not afford the clothes and accessories to be those things. I either got rejected from St. Thomas or St. Agnes and thats why I am here. My school is a dump, but I don't care because we have girls, unlike St. Thomas. We hate St. Thomas because they are a real school and call them "gay" even though we have more gay students. I think our football team is good, but I dont go to games because I don't own a car. I am a Panther.

Lamar High School
I am either a rich white kid or desperately poor. We have so many cliques because for some reason every group under the Sun goes to our school. There are the "IB Students" who segregate themselves from the normals. Our school is the size of a small town in Texas and our school would explode if we had anymore people. Football team? Yeah they are good but I dont go to games because either I am too busy with my Mercedes or can't afford to attend the games. I am a Redskin.

Strake Jesuit College Preparatory
I live in Sugarland or some other suburb and I have long hair. I drive a Passat because I pretend to be an environmentalist. It doesnt matter who you talk to on our campus, they have all smoked pot at one point. Even though we are snobs who couldn't care less about other people we pretend to be "men for others". I hate people from Katy almost as much as I hate St. Thomas. For some reason my school is located between Chinatown and a ghetto. We have a good football team, but I wasn't allowed to play any sports because I wasn't recruited. I love St. Agnes girls, any other girls are scum. I play hacky sack, I dip and I listen to Phish. I am a Crusader.

Bellaire High School
I live in a city that considers itself too good for the city of Houston. Even though I am rich, I am not above using lots of drugs and behaving like a total ass. There are lots of hot girls at my school, but they are all reserved for football and baseball players. I hate the baseball team and baseball players, I used to play baseball at some point in my life, but I sucked. I drive an SUV or a sports car and I love to flaunt it. I am a Cardinal.

Stratford High School
I live in the "poor" area of Memorial, that is the under a million part. I am upper middle class ,but compared to Memorial kids I am poor. We hate Westside and they hate us. I go to a school with no windows. There's never anything to do on the weekends except for Whataburger. Unlike Memorial kids, I dont drive a brand new BMW,but a used Lexus. I know everything about everybody and everybody knows everything about me.I go to parties that get busted before they even start.We are known for our prude girls and having the best good looking guys.Our football team always gets their ass kicked by Memorial... I am a Spartan.

St. Agnes Academy
I am probably a rich girl. I drink a lot and if I'm really adventurous, I smoke. Mommy and Daddy wanted me to go to a school in a "Christian" environment, so they put me in the biggest drama filled shark tank in the city of Houston. For the St. Thomas/Strake rivalry, we choose sides by which school has the cutest guys. We are the ultimate sister school, not IWA or Duschene. We also have an all boys school next door, unlike them. HAHA. We love to have dances, even though they usually suck. I would be in a sport, but oh my gawsh have you seen their uniforms. I am a Tiger.

Episcopal High School
I live in the Bellaire area, but it doesn't really matter where I live because I still have more money than you. I am rich beyond your wildest dreams, yet I constantly screw up and get busted with drugs. If you don't have a laptop you better get one and if you don't have a BMW or Mercedes you better get one. Did I mention we really love drugs here. Even though we are a "religious" school, we have almost no religion in our lives at all. Our lacrosse team is pretty good, but I don't even know what that is. Have fear, I am A Knight.

Westside High School
Revised- Our school looks like a resort and since we are a new school, we have not been totally filled with undesirable people, drugs and crime(until now). I live either in the ghetto or in a rich area (probably the ghetto).Our school is full of New Orleans kids.We provide most of the drugs to all the rich schools, and break into their cars while doing it. If I'm a girl I am probaly dating a black guy or a wigger. If your looking for some weed let me know. I am a Wolve.

St. Johns School
We are pretty similar to Episcopal, except even richer and in the River Oaks Area. Pot? Please, our housekeeper gets his Pot from me, Pot is sooo passe. My parents didn't want to send me to Lamar and expose me to an ounce of diversity. I play sports, but we only play other super rich schools like Episcopal and Kinkaid, so we suck. We claim to be private, but we have no religion classes or real religious affliliation. We used to be called the rebels, but we thought that would offend minority students, but we dont have any of those. I am a Rebel... errr I mean Maverick.

Westbury High School
We used to be a great school kinda like Lamar or Bellaire. But once integration started in the 1970's our school went to hell. My school is in a middle class suburb, but almost none of the white kids in the area go to my school. If I am white that means I am a total screw-up. Even black students are no longer go here, because of how much our teams suck. We like to "defend our turf" against New Orleans kids. Even though we are mostly minorities, our mascot is a major Confederate symbol. I am a Rebel.

The Kinkaid School
See "St Johns School" except we are in Memorial.

Westbury Christian High School
I am either from Southwest Houston or I was imported from another state to play basketball. The only reason I am at this school is because I was a screw-up and couldnt get into a good school like St. Thomas, St. Agnes or Strake. But my parents didnt want me to go to a public school like Bellaire or *shudder* Westbury. Our basketball team is good, I think I saw one of our players driving a Cadillac Escalade. I drive a sedan because my family is only middle class. God I wish I had gotten into St. Thomas. I am a Wildcat.

Incarnate Word Academy
We are the oldest school in Houston and you can tell from how tiny our school is. Our school is about as big as the house of a Memorial student. I am either really poor or got rejected by St. Agnes. We try to be St. Thomas' sister school, but the last time I was on their campus, they refused to look at me. Since we have been in the same place for 130 years, we have had to build up. Since our school is in a ghetto, we are surrounded by Triple Barbed Wire. I understand the phrase "Que Pasa?" you know what that means. I am a Falcon.

Duchesne Academy
If you think St. Agnes girls are rich or snobby, then you have not met us Duchesne girls. We are the ultimate snob girls and, unlike St. Agnes, we have been together since we were 3 years old. Despite all of the drama and snobbery we are doomed to be almost in the same class as IWA of "lower tier sister schools". St. Thomas guys wont go near us, Strake guys wont go near us. Probably because of the large gate around our school to protect us from the ghetto of Hunters Creek. We have 10 hours of homework a night and we have to apply to college when we are sophomores. Field Hockey is our strong sport, nope no one gives a ****. I am a Charger.

 

No high schools from Alief?

 

I know people from Pius X (They live in my Houston neighborhood) and my child hood best friend goes to St. Thomas, so this list is funny to a sophmore at Ohio State U too...

 

Is it just me or are there a disproportionate amount of "Rich Kids/Schools" described by this email. Certainly not all of the schools are going to have rich kids.

 

my fraternity brothers from Episcopal fit that mold pretty well.

ha!

good read.

 

For all the parochial schools on the list, they left off Lutheran High North. Maybe Jeff can right an addendum to the list for Lu High North.

 

stratford high school = some of the worst years of my life

i was actually poor instead of just being "poor"

when i went to college, i thought to myself, it can only get better and it did

i feel sad for people who say their high school years were the best years of their life

 

thats what i was thinking too

 

High school ranks as the four most wasted years of my life, and not just because of the beer and weed consumed. A complete utter waste of time.

 

"It's funny because it's true!" - Homer Simpson

I'm VesceySux, a graduate of Memorial High School, and I approve this message.

 

considering anyone that went to st. thomas liked balls, i think pius was the better alternate.

respect.

 

i agree as well

 

There is one of these out there on Texas colleges. Its pretty dead on too.

 

As a proud graduate of Westbury High School, I take strong exception to that list...even if it's true.

 

That list has too many rich schools. We need some Klein Forest and Big Ike there