Ok, so we are having a very small meeting with a higher up at our office that is in charge but doesn't come around much. The meeting is about structural changes that are coming soon and that he wants our input on it. One of my co-workers that hasn't been too happy lately speaks up and says she wants to make sure that if we have input that it won't come back to bite us in the backside. The boss says "I can't guarantee that it won't". Then he proceeds to intimate that this particular person hasn't been getting their stuff done and they need to worry about that more than the input... hmmm uneasy... then she retorts rather bruskly "Well thank you for that comment." He replies, "ya no problem." uh wow awkward... Then she leans over to her immediate sup and says "I don't feel well" and walks out. Then the boss talks about how that pissed him off. Bad thing is she didn't stick around long enough to hear me defend her. It was like Kostanza at the Italian place with the tip jar. It doesn't mean much if they don't see it! There truthfully isn't much risk to me even if she is gonzo. I'm wondering if she is coming back at all. Anything awkward ever happen where you work?
When I was a teenager working in a part time job at a lazer tag place, I started dating a co-workers sister. As a joke, they gave me a bag full of condoms and ky jelly, but I didn't have time to find out what it was. I left it in the break room near everyone's lunches and ran into the arena to proctor a game. About half an hour later my boss runs to the front desk where all of the employees were standing around, mechanically raised up the bag and in a hateful whisper said, "Who left this in the breakroom?" I raised my hand and said it was mine, and then he replied, please leave you sex accessories at home where they belong. Then he couldn't help but break out in an enormous fit of laughter.
I walked into a coworkers office while he was looking at pictures of weight lifting chicks in leather bikinis. I was caught off guard by the whole scene and it took me about thirty seconds to remember what I went in there for and then another thirty to form a sentence about it.
I once delivered food to this house where the occupants had been drinking heavily, and a woman opened the door topless to sign the credit reciept and recieve the food. I just stood there...starring....
This guy I work with had hemeroids, he went to the bathroom to put cream on thea "area". Well, the lock on the bathroom didn't work too well, and a customer just opened the door and saw him with his leg hiked up on the toilet and he got the red eye.
When I was an intern, there was a guy that always made loud personal calls in the office across the hall with his door open. For two days straight he was calling around to find out about the best Doctor to see him about a horrible rash on his foot. You would look into his office and he'd be on the phone with his shoe off scratching his foot with his pencil.
Once, I was visiting this Rocket's fan site, and someone posted a link to a funny commercial from Ford about a "Sports Ka" that bit a cat's head off. I sent the link to my boss, and he opened it with his boss. However, the guy who was hosting the video must have been pissed about all of the hits on his file, so he replaced it with gay p*rn. My boss laughed at my story, but I'm not sure he ever believed it.
Gosh I love the search function. I seem to recall one post from back in the day... http://bbs.clutchfans.net/showpost.php?p=598171&postcount=1
I had been at my present job for close to a year and my supervisor took me and another co-worker into this lady's office so he could chew her out with us watching. The sad thing is I asked him, jokingly, if that is what he was going to do and he just laughed. Both the co-worker and me did not like that lady that got the chewing out but we both apologized to her as what my supervisor did was highly unprofessional, IMO. The next day he told me and the co-worker that he had put in his notice and was taking another job. As long as I live, I will never forget how unprofessional his conduct was that day.
One time I made homemade turkey chili for a pot luck luncheon at work. This was probably 7 years ago or so. Anyway, I made it completely from scratch including cooking up the dry beans, turkey meat, etc. . I also added several sliced jalapenos, a lot of spices(think cayenne, chili powder, and cumen among others), and some beer. So, I made it the night before and ended up eating some of it for dinner. Little did I know that this was a huge mistake in the making. I went into work the next morning, brought the turkey chili in, and all is great...right...wrong? It turns out the chili I ate the night before upset my stomach something awful(must have been the beans and jalapenos). So, I'm at work and I'm having one of those incidents where I can barely walk as I'm cramping over from stomach pains. I can barely drag myself out of my cubicle let alone make it to a bathroom...but, somehow, I had to find a way. If you've seen the "American Pie" movie where Stiffler gives Finch the stuff to give him a bowel movement...think of that. So, I don't want to use the normal restroom cause I'm about to explode out in "fart n spray" city and that would be bad. Luckily, we had some private restrooms for the handicap. I just barely made it and, even then, it was pretty loud and I was trying to keep it down. I was so close to dumping in my pants that day at work no less. It wasn't pretty. So, I kept thinking that my homemade chili was going to make everyone else sick but I guess it never did as I didn't hear anything. That was one hell of a day, though. I never had such bad stomach pains in my life. DAMN THOSE BEANS! Anyway, it was kind of funny in retrospect. I was so close to an even worse fate. I'm surprised I survived to tell about it. Moral to story...never chow down on homemade spicy chili with beans the night before a work day. You may pay the price! Surf
I have a friend who actually did this at work. He had eaten some greasy food that didn't agree with him. Fortunately, there weren't any co-workers or other people around at the moment, but he couldn't run to the bathroom when he wanted because he had to answer two time-consuming phone calls. When he finally got to go, I think it was more to clean up the mess than anything else. At least I don't think there were any in-person witnesses.
This wasn't at work but definitely qualifies as a "hmmm...awkward" moment. My freshman year of college, I lived in the dorms and got one of those roommates you pray you never get. I could go on about this, but there was one incident which still makes me chuckle every once in a while. I knew my roommate had a big thing for p*rn because I would always see him huddled over his computer periodically glancing back at me to make sure I wasn't looking at his monitor. Well it was about 7:45ish PM one day, and I was on my way to the gym. He knew I usually spent about 2 hours there when I went. We also always kept our door unlocked when one of us was in the room because - why lock it? We each went to sleep at midnight each night at the very earliest. It just so happened that the gym closed down at 8 PM that night for a softball game or maintenance or something like that. I came back up to the room and the door was locked. Let me add in here that except for going to class, my roommate never left the room. Not to eat, not at night, not on weekends, never. Oh God, I thought, I know what's going on in there. I jingled my keys a bit so he would hear that I was outside and would have time to uh, clean up? After giving him a good head start, we both opened the door at the same time, and I walked in and spotted his monitor was turned off with a fresh stack of Kleenex on his keyboard. I tried to pretend like I didn't notice because this was already awkward enough. "Oh yeah dude, sorry I locked the door, I was about to go to sleep." I thought to myself, "why would you lock the door if you were going to sleep and why would you go to sleep at 8PM you idiot? Atleast think of a better story than that." Anyways, I think I just looked down and muttered something about the gym closing early. Hmmm....awkward. Aside from telling every single person that I knew about the incident, I tried to forget about it.
So this doesn't have anything to do with work or anything, and it's more of a disturbing story than awkward, but here it is: This past July, I went down to Fort Lauderdale for the 4th weekend to spend with some friends. Well the guy whose place I was stayin at was at work, so I decided to go head down by the beach to get some lunch and walk around. Well I'm walking back in the direction of his place, waiting for a bus to arrive (there were bus stops every 100 feet or so, so I just kept walking instead of just sitting and waiting...and I liked the view of the women on the beach). So as I walk along, distracted, this older man who is sitting down by a bus stop all of a sudden starts talking to me. So I figure, whatever I might as well just sit and wait for the bus anyway. Well the guy is in his 60s and mentions something about waiting there for a friend of his to arrive and asks about me. I tell him I'm a college student visiting some friends and with that he says something that I'm thinking, wait, there's no way he just said what he said: "Oh, a college student, all **** and balls and no cash." Soooo, I figured, well, ummm, okay maybe it was a joke that I didn't get(?). Well whatever, I thought. So he continues by giving me advice in life on hwo to become successful...he was an insurance salesman for years and became a millionaire. Well then he starts talking about his brand new condo...and wants to know if I would like to see it. I decline. But here's the kicker: He says "so, are you bi". "Noooooo" I response, a bit perplexed. "Oh," he says, "then why are you by the gay beach?" I whip my neck around to find banana hammock universe. Turns out this one place I stopped to chat with the guy happened to be in the 200-foot "gay beach" section in Pompano. Yeah, I must've been really really distracted to not quite realize where I was. Not that there's anything wrong with it, just...not my cup of tea. Well being the nice guy that I am, instead of running away, I sit there for a couple more minutes desperately aching for that damn bus to arrive. This guy then decides to tell me that he is basically a man-w****...and he has non-gay clients that come to him. With that, he goes into full detail of how he would molest me in a nice way (yes, apparently there is a nice way to verbally molest a person), exact explicit information of which I won't post...and have seriously tried to forget. However the moment he mentioned sticking things in places that shouldn't be stuck is when I darted away, full sprint, faster than any mass transit bus imaginable. I felt violated for days, haha. Moral of the story, if you go to Fort Lauderdale, don't talk to strangers.
heh...That actually happens to food delivery guys more often than you would believe. In the entire time I delivered pizzas in college...I had that happen to me several times..either entirely nude or with robes that werent tied in front. I also used to get booze and blunts as tips....I really loved that job!
And more often than some people would like. http://bbs.clutchfans.net/showthread.php?t=63107&highlight=pizza+delivery
