Friday Afternoon Story Time With mlwoo (06/04/2010)

I went to Maui in the beginning of May. It was beautiful and blah blah blah. The best part of the trip was in the Houston airport at the baggage claim when I arrived home.

Aaron Brooks walked up with a hat on and his Ray Ban Wayfarer frames with the glass lenses that apparently do nothing. It was kind of hard to spot him. He had just flown back from Seattle. Since I love him and he is the only man in this world I would totally do, I spotted him immediately. Normally in these situations, you are supposed to play it cool and not freak the guy out. It didn’t work out quite like that.

Me: “AARON! AARON! HEY AARON! I ****ING LOVE YOU!!”
Aaron: “Um . . . . hey . . . .”
Me: “DUDE! I ****ING LOVE YOU! I HAVE YOUR JERSEY IN MY CARRY ON! LET ME SHOW YOU!!!”
Aaron (walking quickly away): Uhhh. . . cool.

So he goes over to his baggage carousel to get his bags. I pull out the jersey and desperately search for a pen so I can get him to sign it. The only thing I can find is a green magic marker from one of the baggage helper guys that worked at the airport. I go get him to sign it.

I get the jersey home and contemplate tracing over the very light signature with a sharpie. I can’t decide if this is ok or not. I have the jersey hanging up for about a week in my room so nothing can touch the signature.

I brought home a random girl the next Saturday night while very drunk. We have some sloppy coitus and I pass out.

I wake up the next morning and I look over and she is wearing the Aaron jersey and nothing else. I start yelling at her and freak her out and tell her to take it off and get the hell out of my house. I barely knew this girl. The signature had completely rubbed off. I was soo pissed. I calmed down a little and was able to drive her home. I was not very friendly but she didn’t know it was signed so I had to be kind of nice.

So I met my here, got his autograph, had a fluzy ruin it for me, all for some intercourse I barely remember. Pretty sad day.

The only thing that matters is I got the last laugh. I gave that ***** the clap. BOOYAH.