How long do you date someone before it becomes and EXCLUSIVE relationship? Before they get the TITLE of GIRLFRIEND? Rocket RIver
If she sees you on a date with another woman and goes ballistic, you are exclusive. Of course by then it's too late.
1-2 months works for me. But I tell you. What is the point. There is no additional relationship trust or security added that you didn't have before. It only means now you lose your manhood. You meet the parents. You get tied into events. You have to give up a lot of yourself. Now if your not at an event its a problem. Wheras before it was like wow he showed up. And what do you really get out of it I wonder. Just more headaches and less sex. Sometimes both at the same time. Exclusive gives you some kind of "in theory commitment" that isn't really there. Or is it. I dunno really, but It seems at 1-2 months I'm usually in the exclusive phase and lose of lot of myself in the process.
Where's the 'Whenever the hell I feel like it' option? At the end of the day, that option is the only right one.
Takes me about a month or so.. usually by that time I figure how much I really like that person and how much I'm willing to invest in them. Sometimes, it turns out to be purely physical.. which usually doesnt last more than a month cuz I wont let her become emotionally attached.
or that's what you hope. Watch it with women. We tend to get emotionally attached a lot more easily, even if we say we're not going to let ourselves. If you do something purely physical, make sure you're up front about that; even so, it might get messy. Nothing bites like knowing someone isn't willing to invest in you as a person but wants to use you anyway. I wouldn't wish the feeling on anybody (except, well, some of the guys who perpetuate it on other people). Just my $.02 - been there, done that, bought the T-shirt, not fun.
I can only go by what I did before I was married, so I'd have to say when they move in with you... more or less. Of course, sometimes there were several in a house of both genders, all good friends, and ending up with different companions, depending on the vibes. Man, I had some good times. The Pill was in flower, there wasn't anything you could get that wasn't cured by a shot, and the very looseness of relationships were part of the sub-culture. It was, like, a totally groovy time. From about 1967 to the early-mid '70's. Bras were out of fashion, everyone's hair was long, and the air was thick with the sweet scent of incense and, uh, whatever. Back to the topic, I guess, whenever you both feel exclusive, then your exclusive. If one of you doesn't feel that way, or has doubts, then my guess is that you're not, or wish you weren't.
Whenever you can tell her, with nothing but love in your heart, to get in there and make you some bean dip.
There were some people I knew in college who took an unhealthy approach. For example, a guy asks a girl out, and she might normally have gone, but she says, "well, [this other guy] just asked me out last week, and we've already been out once." In other words, the guy who asked her out first has exclusive rights to her until he gives up or graduates or something. That was just not healthy. Needless to say, she was just waiting until she could end up with the other one. I don't know why she didn't just do it and save everyone the trouble. Dating, at the beginning, shouldn't be exclusive. On the other hand, when you begin to be physically involved... that's when you might want to keep it to one at a time. (believe it or not, dating does not have to involve that )
