I think if a man take care of his child he shouldnt have to pay any child support. And I think women should have to show receipts of what they spent the child support money on. I dont think its right when I see a mother wearing Jordans and her child has on payless. I dont think women should be able to spend child support money on them I think every dime should be spent for the child needs, and not on the mother. Agree or Disagree?
Disagree. Every situation is different. It is your child's welfare at stake. If the mom needs the money for groceries, or rent, or electricity, or gas, or new clothes for a job interview, this is money spent for the child's welfare. Increase your payments voluntarily when you get a raise. Don't wait for the court. Pay through the District Clerk or AG for tracking. Man up and pay if this is what was ordered.
It's easy to say this because as a culture we are conditioned to think this way. Unfortunately, a lot of the time mothers look at child support as their income. My mother felt like her child support money was something she was owed for dealing with the kids, not money that was actually supposed to be used to support me. Lots of women get that child support money and then they use as little as possible to get their kids by and then enjoy the rest for personal pleasures.
I pay $1500 a month in child support. This is post tax money. Do you really think that it cost $3000 a month, after tax, to raise two kids? No. Freaking. Way. The thing that pisses me off even more is that she still asks me to pay for sports, school clothes (that I never see since she never lets them bring any clothes at all to my house and we have to provide an entire wardrobe for both of my kids including shoes), winter coats (I get asked for this one every freaking year and I once again have to provide at my house as well), and many other things. I did pay for this **** for a long time, much to my wife's chagrin, but finally quit and told her to budget better. Another thing that seriously pisses me off is that she takes my kids to the emergency room for every god damn thing. She once took my daughter to the ER for pink eye. My son has been taken to the ER multiple times for asthma attacks when he does not have asthma that bad. Sometimes when you have asthma, you have ****ty nights. You have to learn to live through it. I know because I have asthma too. What is really bull**** is that since I have to carry them on my insurance, which I have zero problem with, I am ultimately responsible for these bills. So what does the dumb b**** do? She puts down her address on all the medical bills so that they are sent to her house, instead of mine, even though they are in my name and social security number. Guess who gets collection notices from the hospital several months later when these bills aren't paid? Yep, I do!! So now I have to watch for every transaction on my insurance and follow up with every doctor\hospital that they go to so that I guarantee that they are paid so that it doesn't **** my credit. What is another kick in the balls is that she routinely takes them to hospitals and doctors that aren't covered under my insurance!! Woo hoo!! Now I have to pay a $1200 ER visit for an asthma attack that would have cost $25 at the doctor the next day. So now I pay this big ass bill and submit it to her for reimbursement of half, which I am due via my decree, but I always get the run around that she doesn't have the money and I, once again, end up footing the whole god damn bill. Awesome! As a dad, do you think I have any recourse other than taking her to court? Hell ****ing no!! But God forbid I ever miss one month of child support, which I don't, she would have the whole ****ing state of Texas on my ass. Wow, what a fair ****ing system!! Thanks Texas!! So no, I wouldn't for one second ever pay that b**** one nickel more than my decree allows for. If I won the lottery and I was able to wipe my ass with Benjamin Franklin's, I'd fight tooth and nail to make sure she didn't get one extra cent. My kids dress like **** at her house yet she has plenty of money to go on a cruise. She had money to buy a house. She had money to buy a moped. She has money for all kinds of **** but rarely any money at all for the kids. My money goes to maintain her lifestyle not for my kids. She thinks that I owe her because I started making drastically more money after we got divorced. It's called karma, you w****. It's what you get for ****ing everyone you worked with. Luckily my son is old enough to where he is starting to see through her and wants to come live with us. We go to mediation on May 19th and my lawyer and I are pretty sure we are going to seal the deal then. Man, it started out not too bad but the more I typed the pisseder off I got.
Some do, some don't. The sad fact is that in 99% of the cases, the mother is the one that ends up being the single parent. The courts are littered with guys that refuse to pay anything toward the support of their children. There needed to be a compulsory system put into place that (in theory) would give the kids the financial benefit of having both parents. Enter child support. I promise you that this system would not exist if it were not for a significant problem of some men depositing their sperm and not fulfilling their obligation to support the child.
Child support is for the child. Alimony is for the woman. Rent, electricity, food, water and other utilities need to be payed, but woman's shoes? Give me a break.
You cannot honestly tell me that you know which money was spent for shoes and which money paid the rent. If a man really does not want to pay child support he could always petition for custody. In three years of being around family law earlier in my career, I can tell you that there are far more women not getting any support for their kids from fathers than there are fathers paying for women's shoes.
Whoa I read this and that freaking sucks. I don't know how I would deal with that situation. Good luck at court on May 19th, go all out!
I wasn't going to reply back in this thread, as I stand by my first post. If it was not implied in my first post, my stance comes from personal experience. I paid child support for 15 years. Sometimes dealing with similar issues as you describe. I'm sorry you have this situation and feel this way about your ex. Sounds like there is much more going on there than just concern over where your $$$ is going. My unsolicted advice: pay your child support and develop a relationship with your ex that will not impart emotional damage to your child that they will deal with the rest of their life. As refman stated earlier, how are you going to determine whose money went for what? Does your ex have a job? Is she re-married? Does he have a job? etc. I'm done. Good luck.
My niece's biological father was always months behind in child payment. He was so far behind he gave up rights to her to forgo any further payments. He was a great guy and will be missed.
Damn master baiter. Hell of an epic story. Spreading green for that read. As I kept reading, I could tell **** was building up more and more and more. That really sucks. I see why you aren't honky tonky proud of Texas here now.
I think that since women have the right to abort a child if they don't want it, men should be allowed to opt not to pay child support and sever custodial rights. Since the courts of this land do not believe a fetus to be a life, a man should not be obligated to pay child support if a woman makes the choice to use her body to bring that non-living fetus into the world as a living creature.
I feel for MB, and there's no doubt that he's hurting badly from having to watch his kid grow up in a household other than his own (which would make me insane), but as you point out, Refman, the vast majority of women have to worry more about getting child support than worrying about buying shoes with the bread. Thank god, I've been married for over 30 years, with a son finishing his first year of university and a daughter about to start high school. Just lucky, I guess (except for waiting too long to have the kids). Hang in there, MB.
