Man severs own penis, throws it at officers March 17, 2006 BY ERIC HERMAN Staff Reporter Before cops threw the book at him, Jakub Fik threw something unusual at them -- his penis. Fik, 33, cut off his own penis during a Northwest Side rampage Wednesday morning. When confronted by police, Fik hurled several knives and his severed organ at the officers, police said. Officers stunned him with a Taser and took him into custody. "We took him out without any serious injury, with the exception of his own," said Chicago Police Sgt. Edward Dolan of the 16th District. Doctors at Northwestern Memorial Hospital reattached Fik's penis Wednesday, sources said. He was listed in good condition Thursday, according to hospital spokesman Andrew Buchanan, who declined to comment further. Smashing car windows Fik, who lives in the 5400 block of W. Berenice, is charged with two counts of aggravated assault and one count of criminal damage to property, said Officer Laura Kubiak. He told paramedics he was distraught over problems with his girlfriend in Poland, Dolan said. Police arrived on Fik's block at 8:20 a.m. Wednesday after receiving reports he was smashing car windows, Dolan said. Fik then broke into a house down the block. A group of six or seven officers assembled in front of the house, Dolan said. The occupants were not home, he added. Fik was bleeding when the officers arrived and may have already cut off his organ, Dolan said. "At that point, this guy came running out, naked, with a handful of knives . . . and started throwing knives at the police officers that were 10, 20, 30 feet away," Dolan said. Fik threw his penis during the confrontation, too, Dolan said. He then went back into the house and re-emerged with "another handful of knives," Dolan said. Dolan sneaked to the side of the bungalow's front steps and stunned Fik with the Taser. Fik fought back when officers went to restrain him, Dolan said. "About 10 feet from the front porch, right on the sidewalk, was his penis," Dolan said. Dr. Greg Bales, associate professor of urology at the University of Chicago, said severed penises are uncommon but surgery usually works. "As long as the penis is placed on ice and reattached within a few hours, the success is usually pretty good," Bales said. link to story
I was squeamishly reading the article until this gem of a qoute. Now I an't stop laughing. This is sig material!
Oh, you guys are soooooo holier than thou.... Come on, who among us hasn't at least considered sawing off his pee pee and throwing it at someone at least once? Seems like a completely reasonable thing to do.
Are you kidding? I've had plenty of alcohol in my time and personally I have never, not even once, considered even for 1/2 a second thought aboput cutting off One-Eyed-Willie. Ouch! Might as well F'n kill yourself - damn sure be less painful.
Howard Stern said if he was a cop and a guy threw a severed penis at him, he would run it over with his squad car before putting it in a bag of ice to take to the hospital for reattachment.
