All, Here I sit again late at night groveling in my own misery. Almost 4 years to the date that this happened to me again. As many of you know, I am the bearer of the extreme turmoil relationship (search some of my previous threads). Tonight I found out that my fiance has been cheating on me. My heart has sunk outta my chest and I feel broken. I feel defeat at the hands of a woman I thought was different. A woman I gave my all too to have thrown back in my face. Working on one hour of sleep now.....I have to be at work in two hours. Why is it so hard for people to have morals anymore?
Hang in there, dude. Get some sleep. Good news...not married. You'll feel a lot better after some sleep. Your body needs it. Your body and your mind will take care of you, no matter what
cwebbster is easily top 3 most deserving of being bought a beer of all BBS members. If there is such a thing as karma you'll be a zillionaire one day.
I've been there, man, I've been there. It's at times like this where you just wish that old adage wasn't so damn true- You know, that the only thing that heals in these situations is time. 'sigh', hang in there and keep your head up. We're all with you in spirit. P.S. ...And get your ring back.
Its not back to Square One as you think. Sure, you might need to find a new person if you decide to go in that direction... but as painful this has been for you, it will undoubtedly be a valuable lesson that you will look back later on in life.
That really sucks for you. That has to feel like you've crushed by a ton of bricks. It sucks anytime but especially that you put all the effort into it, and got engaged and everything. Just hang in there, and it will get better eventually.
Bro from reading this thread (For those who couldn't find it): http://bbs.clutchfans.net/showthread.php?t=161983&page=1&pp=20 I would say she has obviously taken you for granted, and you brought this on yourself. She obviously doesn't like to be treated, like a "princess". This may sound confusing but she doesnt need the affection you show her. It may even be overwhelming. As far as the past bar fight, she should have seen that you were trying to help her and standing up for her, but she took it to a whole different level by saying you were a "cheater". Based on your past actions and your current situation, I would say deep inside you are willing to forgive her, because you "truly" love her (not being sarcastic), but you have to realize she doesn't want you. When you mentioned she was in an abusive relationship before, I thought to myself maybe she is just reacting in the same manner towards the wrong person. But that is definitely not the case, that is her character whether you like it or not. She will not change unless a miracle occurs, which is also possible. But as a fellow clutchfan, I would strongly recommend staying away from her. Don't be surprised if she is back with the guy who abused her in the past relationship. Hang in there buddy, I know you love her, but you have to think about yourself and whats best for you. She may make you happy 2 times out of the week but that definitely doesn't exceed the sadness you endure from a situation like this.
Cwebb, You will rally my friend, and it is a good thing you found out BEFORE you got married....DO NOT TAKE HER BACK...... And is it THIS girl from the other thread? Dude, if it is her, the sooner you kick this witch to the curb the better off you will be. DD
and it does seem fairly clear now that the reason she was so quick to call you a cheater was because she was cheating
I am extremely sorry to hear this. As far as the bar situation (I guess I missed that thread nefore...wow man....that's horrible), there is a thing as self-defense, and if someone is hitting me in the face 15 times, I don't know what I would do....It probably wouldn't have been good, though. Like others have said, unfortunately, the writing was on the wall. That being said, I wish you the best of luck, and I hope you can find someone that can truly appreciate you for who your are, because you sound like a hell of a guy.
Almost always the case. I broke up with my girl a couple weeks ago. I've decided to use the newfound time on my hands to work out and try to quit smoking. You'll be fine, bro. Time does heal all wounds.
Violent and unfaithful. Nice. Don't return her calls. Don't talk to her. Don't see her. Move on with YOURSELF. this is key for anyone else that just broke up and it is really hurting from it... WORK ON YOURSELF RIGHT NOW. DO NOT DATE FOR AWHILE. You KNOW there is some stuff that you have been wanting to do but haven't had the time. Work out more, take a trip, go rock climbing, play more poker with the boys, learn a new language, take some classes to get a better job, whatever. Devote the time and resources you used to spend on that cheating w**** and invest in yourself. Once you get yourself to a better place, the right person will be there waiting for you.
I went back and read this post in the original thread...... ...not to sound harsh bro, but RUN FOR THE ****ING HILLS!!! I know it hurts today, but you saw the writing on the wall back when you posted this. Trust me, I know crazy chicks. You will look back one day and although you had some good times, you'll be happy you never married her.
Actions are a vote of choice. Obviously if she cheated she was not happy or satisfied with the relationship, and her continuation of the relationship would just lead to larger deceit and false promise for you ultimately resulting in a larger, more catastrophic meltdown. Yes she is lame for not owning up and telling you she was not happy in the first place, but if I were you I would not make things worse by wallowing in self pity and thinking that this woman is morally inferior when in reality she just does not feel you are her match. The sooner you realize that the better off you will be and the more you will grow as a person. I hope your wounds heal quick and completely.
