Ok, so I guess this qualifies as another love thread. My girlfriend of over 2 years yesterday literally just woke up and decided that she didn't have any feelings for me anymore. I mean she waits less than a month before we were gonna move into the apartment that we chose and mind you after we purchased over 3,000 of furniture and other crap for the apartment which was all in my name to decide this. Anyways so she gives me the dreaded "friends" line and I am like wtf. Then she goes on to tell me that even though it's over we can still "make love" whenever and however I want, as long as we both are free. Feeling like someone just took a knife and gutted my insides I told her "no thank you" to put it lightly. I asked my friends and they told me I was crazy not to take her up on the offer, so I guess I just wanted to know what ya'll thought. Man I really don't understand women sometimes, you feel like you have direction and purpose in your life and then it totally gets chewed up and spit back in your face. Has anything like this ever happened to any of ya'll before, and if so how did you handle it.
I don't know if this is good advice or not, but I've always heard that if a girl has "casual" sex with someone for long enough, they will develop feelings for them. I say, take her up on her offer, and use it a lot. Give her space to date for a while, and eventually she'll realize why she was with you for two years. Good luck!
If ever there was an opportunity to bring some kinky weirdness into a relationship, this is it. Its going to get ugly, so you might as well get a threesome out of it.
How old are you? If you're in your 20's, I might tell you to go ahead and accept her offer. However, if you're either in your 30's and/or looking for someone serious, I would tell you to forget about her.
She flaked out. Happens to all women. They completely change most of the things in life that they like and don't like. girls in their early teens flake out every 3 - 6 months. In their late teens, they flake out at about once a year. When they start hitting their early twenties, they flake out about once every two or three years. When they hit late twenties, early thirties, it takes 'em about 3 - 5 years to flake out. then, as they get older, it slows down dramatically. ... Oh man! She gave you the 'friends' line!?!?! She's got the hots for some other guy. ... And she says it's still okay for you to have sex?!?!? Translation: "I'm screwing some other guy. He's not my boyfriend, and I don't want him to be my boyfriend. But I like having sex with him, and I don't want that to be wrong. So, I want to dump you (my boyfriend) and be free to have sex sometimes with you AND sometimes with the other guy."
I am in my early twenties, but the thing is as sad as it sounds I still very much have feelings for her,don't get me wrong I LOVE the sex but that reallly doesn't mean much to me. It's just a motha thinking about how much we went through together, and then out of the blue she's like, "Ok, I know I told you this, this and that but I don't feel the same way about you anymore." Now she's talking about how she doesn't know who she is, and what the meaning of life is and all those general areas. I am not the type of guy to get attached by any means, before this relationship the longest I ever stayed with a girl was less than a month, but it's driving me crazy, that I love her so freakin much that I can't say "the hell with it." As for the other guy scenario she promised me that it was not because of that but at this point I find it hard to give much credibility to her word.
She's probably just going through an internalized problem right now and the best thing for her is to just step away from anything that might remotely confuse her more. She's at the 'What's best for me' moment. Might want to figure out what brought her to this stage.
That sucks, man. If she dumps you while you are in good form but for no good reason, just imagine what would happen when you were down. This is not someone you want to seek to have long relationship with.
If you 'love' her like you say, then it wouldn't be casual sex. You would still think of her has your g/f while she is out playing ball with every other guy. If you continued contact with her, you will never get over her and move on with your life. The "about to move into an apartment" should be your clue. She's afraid to take the next step in the relationship. Shes not into you as much as you are hoping. Shes immature. she doesn't know what she wants and she doesn't want you to help with it. Go find a real woman.
Thanks for the advice, that's pretty much on target with what my fear was. That it would only be a one way love, since I just can't think of her as friend. I guess I just need to get her out my head, although right now that seems harder than I'd like to think.
Bad news is, you need to move on. Good news is, you've got booty call rights, which can come in REAL handy. You're young. It won't take long to see her faults, and realize that you're better off. But don't sleep with her again until you've bagged some new tail first.
