Clearly she was/is into you.. don't sweat it and move on living life like you normally would. And thank her for clearing things up with her email .. even though she's clearly playing mind games with you. The more you get stressed out about it the more she will sense that she's getting to you... which I think is her intent. As you start to bring females over she'll be even more upset with you.. but who cares?! :grin:
OP just act like none of this happened. She will come back for more. Just give it time. That text was her protecting herself from being put off by you because you were too oblivious to realize she wanted the D. Women are interesting animals.
I vote for more flowers at this point. Obviously, what she told you is nonsense, and what she told her roommate is what REALLY matters. I'll bet I'll be hearing this on the John Jay and Rich show pretty soon.
Advice from someone who has had two situations with female roomies... A: Don't sleep with them/date them/Etc. B: Please read A again.
OP, you need to either: find a new living situation, OR spend a LOT of time away from the apartment for the next few weeks. For better or worse, whether you warrant it or not, she is clearly creeped out a little. Just leave her alone. That's easiest with one of the two options I gave you. Seriously. Talking is NOT going to make things better right now. You looking like you have a completely separate life from her is what will help (if it can be helped at all). Sigh.
My God. The fact that she felt the need to send that email to you tells me everything I need to know about how she is reacting to your moves. Just let it die. Don't respond to that email. Just live your life normally. She thinks you're being weird and creepy.
do you really believe that ? Most of us never learn. We tell ourselves we will learn. all that means is we know what's going to happen so buckle yourself for the outcome but the same mistakes will always be made.
Its kinda crazy how OP would've been better off if he had asked her straight up "are you mad because I had a girl over" or something along the lines, from the beginning. He thought that would be awkward and wanted to play it cool. So instead, he sent her flowers, started to act weird and creepy. lol
I've had a bad experience in line with the OPs and it just makes you realise that you have to be 100% clear with women about what you want. InvisibleFan is spot on, Women will RARELY like 1/1000 go all in, they'll hedge and wait for the guy to do something cause of their egos. OP has been bsing and way too ambiguous, too emotionally involved in the situation to be able to step back and realise how he's acting. The flowers were literally the worst idea possible OP. just step back and detached from it..
First off, you still haven't stated what you want. Things change and as much as she's changing her needs, you've probably realized a few things since your first post. You sound like an idiot in denial right now, but I've been in a lot of awkward situations. You learn when you take risks. She's your roommate first, so you want to be friends on a better footing. Take the initiative to reply with some damage control. 1) Main thing is consistency. If you were a goofball when you bonded, add some of that. Her message frames you in a bad way and it leaves a big stink in the room. Readjust the picture to what you want to be moving forward. She's probably labeled you times before when you were closer. If you were "sweet" include some things to make the message sweeter. If you were "dumb" remain blunt and honest. 2) Keep what you want to address short. 3) Have an exit or cool down strategy and lay some expectation for it. "It's cool that you think we're cool. I felt like things changed when I brought a guest over. I feel better now that I know it was only you wanting space. [Being a big brother/having no dad/owning my own drug corner] I can get protective of the house I live in, so I'm still adjusting living with roommates. I wasn't expecting this to always happen, but I enjoyed it when we hung out and when you cooked for me [and the other **** you did yadda yadda yadda], so I just want to say that I appreciated that. Don't worry about me feeling uncomfortable, it's your place too. I'm going to spend some time out for a few weeks. In that time, I hope you can start to feel more comfortable outside your room. No harm in starting over as roommates who talk from time to time... I'm a bit more noticeable and less sneaky if I'm not a stranger. " If you're gonna be awkward or obliviously dumb after that, then follow other people's advice by not replying to the message and disappearing for awhile. Regardless, don't fill your mind with useless future thoughts or protecting whatever image you think you have. Accept that people make mistakes, and if you're not perfect, she damn well isn't either.
