Oh, Oh...Now What?? (Update on my Woman Situation) - Need Advice

This is the status quo for a testosterone filled room...

 

Swing batter!!!

 

not to be a downer, but when i read the words "showed her attention" i thought that was more along the lines of her wanting him to buy her things... maybe its just my pessimistic views sticking their nose where they don't belong...

 

Blow her off. Go get some new digits. Take her phone number from your book, curl it up carefully, and light it on fire. Dispose of ashes tastefully.

She can visit when she wants, but waste no time, energy, or
attention on this fish.

 

I can't add anything that hasn't been said, Manny...You got a lot of pretty good advice here...I hate to say it but I agree with Mrs. JB.

Most important thing I can add is to trust your instincts. I consider you a true friend Manny and I hope you don't get hurt...whatever you decide, I wish the best!

 

It's a Race! (with the Mr. Bean accent).

oh yeah, and if you expect to win, don't forget one of these j/k

good luck!

 

I never understood why dating has to be so exclusive these days. I mean, sure, you need to get in a serious relationship sooner or later, but it's just dumb that some people think you're committed after one date. Shouldn't you ease into the commitment thing gradually?

Of course, everybody has to make a choice sooner or later. It looks like you have a lot more to offer her, commitment-wise and character-wise, than the other guy; hopefully she'll see that sooner or later. (though sometimes women have a choice like this to make and keep insisting on making the wrong one... I've been there and done that, and they'll regret it one day)

Hang in there for a while and make sure she knows you're there for her - she may come around. Just don't let yourself get too personally involved: don't spend too much time thinking about her, do date other people, and don't get physically involved yet.

If this other guy was so great, or was so interested in her, he should have done something about it a long time ago. The problem is - she may or may not be able to see that. I think it's kind of romantic that you're willing to fight for her; just as long as you don't get hurt.

 

Just do your thing and don't worry about the other guy. Isn't there always another guy, anyway? The worst mistake you can make is to try to win her by not being yourself. If you win her heart, so be it. If not, it wasn't meant to be. I'm a firm believer in fate, so I naturally think things will sort themselves out in the long-run...

Personally, I get a little uneasy about the following quotes:

... but if this doesn't bother you, so be it. YOU DA MAN! YODA MAN!

 

4 Prez,

Good advice. Men have to learn math. There are more women than men. Manipulation sounds like the order of the day. Can you send me the Christie article? I could not find it.

 

Oh, dude, now all the women are going to give you conflicting advice... bummer.

It depends on how you end up feeling for her after a few more weeks or months. I would continue to see her, but I would *not* go the friend route, because I think that's hard to break out of. Obviously *be* friendly, but make sure she knows that you're also thinking of her in a romantic way. If after a few weeks or months you've decided you're long-term interested, *then* you can start making more important moves and/or demands. But I really think this is going to involve romantic vigilance, if that makes sense. Don't fade into the background unless you decide that's where you want to be.

(I think I'm giving this advice because of my own experience: Elvis made it clear to me nearly from the beginning that a) he really gave a **** about me as a person, long-haul and b) he really wanted to have sex with me *a lot* , and it worked! Reader, I married him, to quote Jane Eyre.)

 

Manny--

Just a few thoughts...

1) Do NOT do ANYTHING differently than you were planning on already. Trying to speed up the time frame or going to heroics to try to win her over are SURE to backfire. Just do what you had planned to do.

2) Do NOT even THINK about getting physical with her. Hugs are fine, as are kisses if she wants them. BUT NOTHING ELSE!!!!

3) Don't overanalyze what she tells you. You will only end up assigning a deeper meaning than is there.

4) Remember that everything she tells you she tells you because she wants you to know. That means that she is wanting you to act a certain way towards her. Figure out what it is and if it fits your personality so be it. If not...move on.

Good luck Manny. You seem like you're a really good guy.

 

that's great advice...much better than my condom advice.

 

You need a down card here. Right now, you're an excellent supportive and genuine guy. All your cards are showing.

I suggest, Manny, ... that you pursue this other guy. That would really confuse her and probably scare him into moving out of town. What a perfectly obvious solution. No thanks necessary. Failing that, I would not take her too seriously and I'd try to date other people too until he's out of the picture. You can always make up another woman...

"Oh, hi, sorry I haven't returned your calls. All this sex with my Willamina is making me kind of tired. .. What's that? Oh, yeah, Willaminia is this, um, really gorgeous, uh, Samoan woman that I met while... I was, um, ... in Samoa!"

edit: I disagree categorically with Refman's advice.

 

tsk tsk... I don't think Dr. Laura would advocate lying, let alone going after a guy!

 

Mrs. Ref agrees with me...that's good enough for me.

 

THREESOME!!

 

leave it to someone named Pole to advocate a threesome where two participants are guys.

 

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

Well, you've got me there. Mrs. B-Bob never agrees with my advice. Go figure!

 

You know what I would do. I would go over to her house early evening when the sun is setting with my acoustic guitar strapped galiantly on my shoulders and proceed to serenade her. But, I believe I can play a guitar well enough to do such a thing since it's one of my hobbies. I would pick a nice song for serenading someone and learn it on guitar. Of course, you would have to sing with the guitar or you wouldn't have much luck. OR, you could get someone else to play the guitar while you sing!!!

Of course, if you or none of your friends are skilled in music, then you could always take your favorite hobby and substitute. For instance, your into RC(remote-control) cars. Do something creative with your remote car. Put a wonderful little card on the car, ring the door bell, hide in the bushes, drive the car straight up the walk when she answers the door, she reads the note, and you pop out exhibiting self-confidence. Then, you present her with a single red rose.

So, feel free to substitute whatever you want. If you really like this girl, then you need to take some risks. What's better than a "trying to be cute" risk? At least show her what your feeling for her. Or, play it cool like Fonzie would do. "Heyyyy...I'm the Fonz. Snap my finger and your mine babe." You could also buy a chopper and some leather pants/jacket and try the Grease II approach .

Ahh...maybe you should just keep it real. Keepin' it real will keep her real. Yo diggity...she diggity you...yo diggity.

This message is brought to you by the softer side of Surf and Rapper MC Surf."