nice post Bats. I think that more then relief that their pain is over, I feel sadness that they couldn't overcome it.
I don't get it. Why couldn't he try to talk to someone about it? How can that not possibly be an option before suicide? In no way am I saying he's "bad" for commiting suicide but at least exhaust all options before even thinking about it. I can see someone commiting suicide due to a fit of negative emotions that overwhelm a person's decision making abilities. But this seems to have been planned for a significant amount of time. RIP Bill Zeller
batman jones put it better than i ever could. i've only had to deal with someone who was raped and thought about killing themselves. if she would've gone through with it, i never would've called her a coward.
I like where this thread is going. RIP Bill, although you could have done great in terms of writing about your pain and raising awareness to abuse...you chose to leave and in the method you are spreading your final words in the same method.
Then we are just different. I think he is a coward, you dont. Was there really a need to start all that bull**** with me? No there wasnt, but you just had to. It is my opinion and while you tried to get me to shut up and change it, you failed. So how about we just drop it?
The part about not being able to use the bathroom in kindergarten makes me cringe because my wife has several kids with similar issues in her class. Makes you wonder what they're going through at home every night. One kid in particular steals everything he can get his hands on. Not toys or money, but random things like post-it notes, erasers, or paper clips. Just stuff a kindergartener would have no use for. He has all kinds of other odd quirks too, including acting out against other kids and even against my wife on a few occasions. He's come to school several times this year with cigarette burns on his face, marks on his neck and arms, and even a black eye. They've called CPS 3 times this year and nothing has ever become of it. The mom (if you want to call her that) can't even manage to get him to school on time. He has 24 tardies in the last 3 months. And the tardies are for being like 2 hours late, not just 5 minutes. She's also "forgotten" to pick him up after school several times. This poor kid hasn't shown up to class since before the break and no one knows where he is. Mom's phone is disconnected and no one's heard from her either. Apparently, CPS is looking for her too. Maybe that's why she skipped town. Point being that what happens to you in childhood CAN affect you for the rest of your life. This poor kid is really doomed. Where is he going to be 20 years from now? His life is basically over before it even has started. Just very depressing knowing how many stupid people out there are so fertile and able to ruin kids lives forever.
yeah, i'm the kinda guy who doesn't call someone whose first memory is one of being raped as a three year-old and lived with the immeasurale pain for 23 years before ending his life a coward. you are. so yeah, i'm pretty ****ing glad we're different.
so important for there to be people in the lives of children who love them without condition...great if it's parents. if it's not them, the rest of us have to be prepared to step up. life is way too precious.
Let me ask you a question since you seem to have actually shown a genuine "I don't get it" instead of a judgmental "I don't get he's stupid." If you are haunted by something very dark that plagues your every thought, you know it's there, you know why it's there, you know it is the source of your unhappiness and your awkwardness, you know it should never have happened, you know how it managed to happen, you know you didn't deserve for it to happen to you and you know you are not the only person it has happened to...you know all this AND STILL it haunts you and impacts you daily...what are you supposed to talk to someone about?
To be fair, he did not see professionals about this particular issue, but other issues that were plaguing him.
I also think Batman nailed it with his post. "There's always someone who can help" and "It will get better" are cliches we like to use to make it easier for our own minds. Some things don't get better, and even if someone else experienced it and learned to live with it doesn't mean they can necessarily help you do the same. Minds are wired differently. We don't want to believe that something can be so horrific for us that we can never get over it because that isn't a pleasant thought.
LOL you are a douche. Im trying to end this and all you do is keep it going. But hey thats just the type of person you are isnt it? It sucks that he ended his life but you know what? I still think he is a coward and didnt try his hardest to keep it going. Im not a bad person, just cuz i believe that. If he would have tried to get help i would totally understand your point. But he just gave up and THAT is selfish, and cowardly acting.
This kid is always hugging my wife. He follows her around like a lost puppy. I get the feeling that's the only affection he's ever seen. Pretty sure he doesn't get it at home and probably never has. Dad isn't in the picture and apparently grandma is just as effed up as mom. She forgot to pick him up from school one day and tried to tell my wife that she "fell asleep" in the car line. That was BS because the teachers have to stay out there until the car line is gone and no one saw her. Just very sad. This poor kid is doomed. Depressing to think about how many more kids out there going through similar situations. And how many will go the same way as this guy.
I see. I'm guessing he didn't have a lot of faith in professionals helping him with this issue when they were unable to help him with his life-long issue. I'm just sad all the way around about it. I tell my kids all the time, the worst thing in the world is regret....living with regret for things you did...AND FOR THINGS YOU FAILED TO DO. It tears me apart that this man's family and the church he was once involved with failed to meet him with love....I just pray I'm not that way, ever, because the temptation is to simply worry about yourself and let other people take care of their own business...that's far easier and not so messy to live life that way...truthfully, it seems to me that's how our culture tells us to live. But it leads to serious isolation. The whole thing is really troubling to me.
I don't know man. I try my best to play "if I were in his shoes" (even though I really can't). The way I see it is that if suicide is an option, it should always be last. In Bill Zeller's case, he was afraid of his secret getting out. That is why he didn't want to talk to anyone. But say he did talk to someone and his fear of it becoming known comes true, he could have commited suicide then....right? At least try imho. But again, our views mean nothing as we only know as much as this letter and can only imagine what he felt like. And I am pretty sure that if we could 'being john malkovich' him, we may end up changing our stances. And in no way do I have any negative views on Bill Zeller. In my mind, I am questioning his choice purely out of logic.
he had been to professionals before that did nothing to help his other issues, why would he believe that they would help him with his darkest demons. the fact that he lived with this terrible mental and physical anguish for 23 years is proof right there that he tried.
