But since you are the fastest animal on the planet I doubt a lot of enjoyment will be had no matter how big your schlong is. Sorry couldn't resist. Happy B-Day Finalsbound!
Finals you can call me if you want, I am a professional stripper. One of the most popular list of clientele 'jobs' are for birthdays, probably second right behind Bacholoret parties. I am not well-known in Houston because I 'dont get around', I see myself as a premium service thus I cater to the more upper class elite so the jobs are less frequent but in the end it's the same. I do this because I believe it would be safer long term. Since your a clutchfans member I will do it for free, but any extra (by you or your guests) and it would cost you. I wont do the 'extra' for free but I'll give you a huge discount so your only paying like 30 dollars, 3 dollars per inch. Your friends would be at the regular going rate. You all also need to provide the proper condoments for the job. Let me know
I love how all these e-personalities think they have a friend to say happy bday to. But happy birthday anyway haha
