1. Commitment - You both need a commitment to be there for each other every day, a commitment to do something (even if it's small) to make each other smile and/or to show them you still love them daily. That positive vibe goes ALONG way through the daily grind and stresses of life. 2. Humility - Being able to acknowledge and admit that you are wrong is big. 3. No Finger Pointing - When you get into a little bit of a conflict, don't start pointing fingers and/or blaming the other for everything. It gets you no where. 4. Have Fun - If you don't find ways to keep having fun with each other, then you two are just going to be miserable. Doing fun things together keeps you feeling closer to one another. 5. There is No Such Thing as "Happily Ever After" - The quicker you both realize this, the better you will be. This is not a movie, tv show or book where the couple gets married a rides off into the sunset forever in love. Marriage and relationships both go through ups and downs and are something you both have to keep working on. Just like a car... you need to rotate the tires, change the oil, etc, etc, to keep it running in pristine condition. 6. Vulnerability - You both need to be comfortable with each other to always reveal your deepest fears, anxieties, insecurities and hurts. Believe me, as a man, the last thing you want to do is come off as "soft" or vulnerable. It's a wall we all build up with ourselves. But, the more you can comfortably share with each other, the closer and more "in-tune" you will be together and with each of your feelings. 7. LISTEN - This is more directed to the guys, but if you actually took the effort to listen, acknowledge, care and remember things she says, it makes a WORLD of difference. 8. Never Take Each Other for Granted 9. Compliments - I know living with someone day in a day out, more of the negatives stand out, but make an effort to give compliments whenever you can or warranted. Think of the positive vibes it builds. 10. Best Friends FIRST, Lovers Second - This is the person you said you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. Your friendship must come first... laugh with each other over anything, spend time with each other and having fun together no matter what is going on, communicate EVERYTHING comfortably, so on and so on. The more you build up this aspect of the relationship, the rest is gravy. The more logs you build together leads to bigger and more frequent flames in the bedroom.
did it take you and yours to have a big fight to find that out? surely, the make-up sex made it all worth it?
I would suggest that if you have common marriage/life goals it will help as you can view one element of your relationship as a partnership to achieve said goals. Goals like how many kids you want to raise, how you want to manage finances for retirement, what kind of lifestyle you both want to live, etc... Having said that, you also need to give each other space for personal goals. Time apart without guilt or jealousy is just as important as time together, IMO.
Are there really this many people who find it irrational to have a monogamous relationship?? Is that really what you think? That every single person who repeatedly has sex with the same person is only doing so because this is the most physically attractive person they can have sex with??
Loyalty, A continuum of love that changes over time, Hobbies, Friends, Kids and the occasional vodka binge before noon. Also, the couple must be Rockets fans for eternal happiness.
My marriage lasts over 10 years and still counting. I have only one word to share: r-e-s-p-e-c-t! I was going to say endurance but I figured respect is the actual 'power' that drives the relationship.
finals, I tried emailing you a link to a similar discussion I'm involved in on monogamy on another BBS (law school bbs, lulz) that you would get a hoot out of, but you keep your email hidden
