OK...in hindsight, I'm somewhat embarassed to say that I watched that abortion of an attempt at bad television. Joey Buttafuoco vs. Joanie Laurer The police should have been waiting outside for Joey to arrest him for Aggravated Assault. This match was pathetic. Horshack vs. Laurer might have been a better bout. Buttafuoco mauls...errr...defeats Laurer Dustin Diamond (Screech) vs. Ron Palillo (Horshack) This might have been more interesting if it was Screech vs. R. Van Winkle. Screech still looks like a dork and, well, Horshack looked like Susan Powder. Diamond defeats Palillo Darva Conger vs. Olga Korbut Who cares...I was in the shower during this bout. Maybe we should try to get Mary Decker vs. Zola Budd. Conger defeats Korbut. And, in what I thought would be the first death in Fox's celebrity boxing... William Perry vs. Manute Bol On paper, this looked like Bol might not only be the first boxer to die in the ring, but possibly eaten. I think the Fridge was exhausted after climbing into the ring and never did deliver the power punches that I much anticipated. I guess it would have been hard to hit Bol since the belt of his shorts were at the Fridge's shoulder level. Bol, on the other hand, was significantly more impressive. Both punches he landed were enough to warrant the decision in his favor. Bol defeats Perry. Before I get crucified...I know...this post is pretty much a waste of 0's and 1's, but I needed to take a break from the Ming/#1 insanity that is going on in the Rockets forum. Future matches I would be interested in seeing... Mr. T vs. Joey Buttafuoco Tanya Harding vs. OJ Charles Nelson Riley vs. Andy Dick Ozzy vs. A Bag of Uncle Ben's Rice Nolan Ryan vs. Robin Ventura (pt. 2, because of the first outcome, Nolan has to have one arm tied behind his back to make it a bit more fair)
what was the deal with those mismatches? Bol and Perry? Height vs Girth Horseshack and Screech? Age vs Youth it was just so lobsided it was ridiculous! I didn't watch it but hope that they would come up with better fight cards in the future... weak. Matches I'd like to see: Mary Lou Retton vs Nadia Komanichi Brian Boitano vs Elvis Stoyko Letterman vs Leno Craig Kilborn vs Conan O'Brian Will Smith vs Robert Horry
Mr. T would obliterate Joey.....terrible matchup! OJ would murder, literally, Harding in what some would call a flashback, and would finally be arrested for a crime, and caught on video, but somehow would be acquitted by another Johnny Cochran performance. He might even pull out the "Chewbaca Defense." I like the Charles Nelson Riley and Andy Dick match. A draw, and perhaps a budding relationship would result after the fight. Ozzy and a bag of rice? OK, as long as Ozzy doesn't talk. I can't understand a damn word he says. Nolan and Robin pt. II - Nolan, a good ol boy from Texas, would still beat up Ventura, even with one arm tied up. All that does is prevent the headlock he had on Ventura last time.
Unless "Celebrity Wrestling" is scripted, there is no way Joanie Laurer stands a chance against Buttafuoco. Buttafuoco should have been defensive, instead of throwing punches and using his weight, after round 1 when it was clear Laurer was going to lose. Buttafuoco pushed Laurer to the mat cause he thought she was going for a low blow. She lost her composure after that but at least she gets a paycheck. The worst boxer had to be Paula Jones, but the only match I saw from CB2 was Buttafuoco-Laurer.
Every match was an obvious mismatch....worst tv ever.I'm really ashamed to say I watched the entire show Another article from espn page2 http://msn.espn.go.com/page2/s/simmons/020523.html
Good post, Boom Boom. Definitely a needed laugh break after all the mayhem going on in the Game Action forum.
The Screech match was the best one. It was funny watching Screech act like a badass. He kicked butt too.
I take no credit for any of these, thankfully. They were collected from another website: --- Brooke Burke vs. Jules Asner Tony Kornheiser vs. Michael Wilbon Dan Patrick vs. Jim Rome Gilbert Gottfried vs. Andy Dick Nolan Richardson vs. Marge Schott Laura Vescey vs. Laura Davies Peter Vecsey vs. George Vecsey vs. Laura Vecsey Dan Issel and John Calipari vs. Mexico Charlie Ward vs. Shawn Green Dave Parker vs. Walter Iooss Jr. (took pic of Parker puffing cig in dugout) Anna K vs. Bob Guccione Patrick Roy vs. the door to his bedroom Eric Lindros vs. Bobby Clarke Ken Hitchcock vs. Ed Belfour (once and for all) Jim Boeheim vs. Mike Waters (Syracuse beat writer) Jerry Tarkanian vs. Mike Wallace/Andy Katz Jim Gray vs. Pete Rose. Piazza v. Rosie O'D Hingis v. Williams Richard Williams vs. Mary Pierce's Dad Mark Cuban vs. Dallas writer's testicles Jeff Van Gundy vs. Alonzo Mourning's leg Scottie Pippen vs. Charles Barkley Anna K vs. Mia St. John John Chaney vs. John Calipari Allen Iverson vs. Larry Brown Mike Tyson vs. Lisa Guerrero in a fornification bout. Stuart Scott vs. Jeff Gordon (a matchup of two wannabe athletes) Kobe Bryant vs. Michael Jordan. Joe Charboneau vs. Mark Fidrych Tony Mandarich vs. Blair Thomas Marty Cordova vs. George Hamilton Tim Kurkjian vs. Mini Me Rasheed Wallace vs. Kenyon Martin Unseld v. tagteam of weber and howard, managed by rod strickland Dave Dravecky vs. Jim Abbott Bill Buckner vs. Mookie Wilson O.J. Simpson vs. Rae Carruth Denny McClain vs. Steve Howe John Daly vs. Jack Daniels Jeff Pearlman vs. John Rocker Hyatt Chef vs. Kobe Bryant Jeff Kent vs. his motorcycle Marty Cordova vs. his tanning booth Brian Greise vs. Terrel Davis' driveway Jason Whitlock vs. Drew Bledsoe Mitch Albom vs. Chris Webber Bill Conlin vs. Charles Barkley T.J. Simers vs. Eric Karros Rick Reilly vs. Barry Bonds
