[Long] I've become a manwhore, now how do I change

Not really. Latvia's had skyhigh inflation the past few years and the standard of living is pretty decent there now. Maybe if you also throw in some toothpaste though.

 

Yes, you were really pathetic on that recording! I can understand your discouragement.

Back on track: it seems obvious that it will be hard for you to change this lifestyle until your job situation is different. What are the chances of that happening?

 

23 posts in and no one is judging you!!! Im feeling good about the board today.

 

Honestly, don't sweat it. You are enjoying life. When you are sitting down at 50, thinking back to how it used to be, you can sit back and smile. To me, it seems the people who don't go through a manwhore period when single are the ones that end up cheating on their wife. Not a blanket statement, just a observation of some people that I know.

Have fun, when you get ready to settle down, you will.

 

I'm in a pretty similar situation to yourself. Young, good-looking in great shape, and with great career prospects. I suppose that ultimately doesn't mean much except that it can be easier to pull women. I'm only two years younger than yourself and I've been living a similar lifestyle to you (minus the consistent traveling). Personally, I don't see myself settling down until probably around 30; if that special girl comes along, there can always be exceptions to be made, of course.

Unlike yourself presently, I have no problem feeling that I'm a good person despite my sexual indiscretions. I have a strong family structure: I visit my parents fairly often, my sister and I are great friends, and I pretty consistently drop by my uncle's house (where grandmother/grandfather also live) to watch Sox/Celtics/Pats games or to just grab a bite and catch up. I do community service when I have the time. Though I don't strongly follow the catholic faith, I still feel much in touch with my religious side and I try to follow the golden rule. I don't see any problem with sleeping around as long as: I'm up-front and honest about my intentions and expectations, I don't mislead them in any way, and I don't do anything to purposefully hurt them. Basically, if I exercise my sexuality in a responsible manner, I don't feel it makes me a "bad" person.

Now, the one difference I see between myself and you that may have an effect on how you've been feeling empty is this: it sounds like you are basically going off of a steady diet of one night stands and one-off sexual experiences. I have my fair share of those, but they have been interspersed between short/medium-term relationships and sexual relationships where the girl and I become friends and have something go goes beyond sex (think "friend with benefits" type of deal). The sex is great, but often times that isn't the best part. The best part is making that connection with the girl. Sharing little laughs and just having them bring a smile to your face.

That connection that you can make with someone will make you feel a lot more alive than than just having a one night stand. And like I said, I make these connections often times without have a "full blown relationship" with them. I don't know your travel schedule, and it sounds like might be away often enough to make a more traditional relationship a little tougher, but I'd implore you to try to have a relationship or two that goes beyond just a surface level sexual experience. It sounds like that is exactly what you are looking for right now. Have some experience with that, really enjoy it, and then it will be a lot easier to consider if you are ready to settle down permanently when you come to that crossroad.

 

... Is that so?

 

yea man...you're a complete catch. haha i listened to that recording for the first time like 2 days ago, hilarious

 

The Latin culture thing make sense. I wouldnt think many cultures outside the US follow the Sex in the City approach. They're probably gonna be more traditional about it. Lot of women put hopes on the deferred backloaded payoff like that. Its kinda hard not to sometimes..If the Rockets sign Ron Artest and he tells the team he's 100% percent gonna opt out in 2 years, there's gonna be some fans or some in the organization that still thinks make him an offer he cant refuse so he'll change is mind.

Still no matter where you're at, if you are honest about your intention as a male, take comfort in how thats 95% better handling than women doing the same. None of the women that broke up with me gave me advance notice that they're riding things out as long as long as the getting is good until i commit, or until they can pull in a guy that makes more money, is in better physical shape and can take care of them better. Or that they're seeing that guy while they're still with me...and stuff.

 

Is it possible that you've been living this type of lifestyle because you are afraid of "hurting" people?

I'm going to try to say this in the least harsh way, but people get hurt (at least temporarily) in relationships. The only way that someone won't get hurt is if you two get married (and that's assuming there isn't a divorce in the future), or you have the mythical "mutual breakup".

All YOU can do is to let your intentions be known and not lead the women on to make it appear that you are willing to give them more than you are. Unless you plan on never dating again, chances are you'll hurt someone in a relationship in the future (and this is assuming that none of your one night stands felt hurt after they reflected on what they did - a real possibility). All you can do is be an honest person and break up as amicably as possible.

If you develop feelings for one of them, hold on tight and enjoy the ride. No use in worrying about if someone may or may not get hurt in the future. Give yourself a chance to have a healthy, fun, enjoyable relationship.

 

If this is true then why are you posting at 2 am and not f-king?

 

When you are old you never regret the ***** you've done, only the ***** you didn't do.

You're cool, rock on.

 

you should read 'the game'. Your story is like an exact parallel to some guy in that book. He realized that he was making women his god and his whole self esteem and self worth was based on the woman he hooked up with last night but deep down inside his life was meaningless. He ended up joining a monastary and becoming a monk.

That is one option.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SmVAWKfJ4Go

 

How do you change? Get a serious girlfriend. Problem solved.

 

You think six figures is good for being in another country while doing your job? Get over yourself. I wouldn't go there for that much especially with terrorism expected to go up. I'd' rather be making 50k and able to interact with my type of people.

You know whats funny? My friend who makes probably 4-5 times as much as you has the same problem. The only thing hes 48, and your 26. Everytime he goes to the Philipines (for business) he ends up sleeping with a ****load of women. He literally brings a crate load of viagra so he can stay up.

He thinks he's a pimp because he sleeps with these "magnificient" women who are half his age. But honestly the only reason they are sleeping with you isn't because of your looks its because they want to be a citizen of the U.S or they want your money. When my friend comes back to the states he can't get any, because of his looks/personality and if they are on him its because of his money.

So morale of the story... your not a manwhore for sleeping with dirty sluts, they are basically giving themselves free of charge to any american, if you wanted to "change" and settle down, you would get another job that allows you to interact with U.S. citizens.

 

You can't do that and soul-search at the same time...

 

You want to know how to stop being a manwhore???

Start by not screwing women you just met. That would be a good start.

 

Okay, best way is to have protection and eventually you will find a good girl? if not isolate yourself with some ugly women and raise your standards..