Congrats ima! I am really happy for you and the future mrs. ima. Been married now for 15 months and it has been the hardest thing I have ever done, but it has definitely been worth it. Some tips: 1) Make sure you discuss finances before you get married - we were blindsided pretty hard by this but we are okay now 2) Learn how to argue without it getting personal - some of your best moments together as a couple can come out of arguments BUT only if you argue as 2 mature adults 3) Communicate, communicate, communicate, and communicate - so many marital problems occur when there is a lack of communication between the husband and wife 4) Also, I would recommend that you don't ever come across like you are trying to change your wife, especially into something that she doesn't want to be. It is okay to voice your concerns about things about her that bother you; however, it is up to her, and only her, to make that change.
Patience by the truckload. Buy two computers or you will never get to see this website or any PC game ever again. Start perfecting the art of being able to watch what sports on TV and pretending to listen to the heart stopping drama about hair treatments, fashion, etc. etc. Praise her cooking!!!! Just like a man wants to be appreciated for bringing home the bacon, a married woman does like to be a bit domesticated and if you praise her cooking, cleaning, etc. not only will she do it more she will work to better herself at it. Little things. Married women appreciate them even more because now that the fish is landed everyone knows that we tend to slack off with the romance. Flowers for no reason, a new CD you know she would like, etc. Good luck, the first few years can be hard but worth it.
Congrats. Now, you both get to jump the hurdles that a wedding creates for you. Whatever you do, don't get carried away with the wedding if you're paying for it. Pick what's important, downplay what's not. Mrs. rimrocker and I got married in our late 20's and paid for most of it ourselves. We got cheap gold bands at Penney's using a coupon for 20% off, she picked a cool wedding dress (the skirt came off to make a mini-dress for after the ceremony) that cost about $400, and we hired a local photog guy for a reasonable price. We didn't have a video, because we've always thought that was weird... your memories are so much more vivid. We splurged on the music, and had good food at the reception, then took a cool honeymoon where we rafted the Colorado River through Cataract Canyon. You can spend $3,000 or $100,000, but how much you spend on your wedding will not affect how successful your marriage will be... in fact if you go into dept trying to meet everyone's idea of what a wedding should be, you are more likely to have a short marriage. Bottom line: get through the wedding in good shape and then constantly work on your marriage... everyday, all the time. Make sure you're friends as well as lovers and make sure you can hit rocky times and still come through. Good luck!
Man, that's freaking awesome!!! Great news! I'm sincerely happy for you! Just remember that very few things you argue about when you're married are even anywhere near as close to important as the relationship itself is.
Something I should've been told before I was married. At least I can live and learn. Congrats Ima. You've always been one of my favorite posters and I'm happy for you and the bride to be. Maybe we can get together pre-DMB show and I can buy you a beer.
off the top of my head.... Spend all of your money before you get married. Splurge. Buy every drum, every television, every car stereo... every toy you can think of that you want...go buy it RIGHT NOW. After you get married, your ability to treat yourself to those things will be drastically diminished. If your wife is brunette, consider that you are committing yourself to never having sex with a blonde or redhead for the rest of your life. Sure, she MIGHT dye her hair someday, but it might not happen, and it still won't be the same as being with a true blonde. (If she's not brunette, you can insert the appropriate hair color in this statement... you get my point). Remember that marriage isn't about love - marriage is about living the rest of your life with the person you love. As years go by, you will change. She will change. It's neatural. Everybody changes. To make your marriage survive, you must have the ability to maintain closeness even after the two of you are completely different people. The hardest times in your marriage will not be when you and your wife struggle against financial difficulty, career, family etc. The hardest times in your marriage will be when you and your wife struggle against each other. When she is 100% positive that you/she should follow one path, and you are 100% positive that you should follow another. Before getting married, talk to your wife and make sure that you both are in agreement about: having children, how they will be educated, their religious upbringing, how they will be disciplined, career plans (for both of you), plans for where you will live and how long you will live there, the environments that you want to build for your wife and (future) children. Do not base your relationship on sex. Prepare yourself for the possibility that your relationship may become sexless in the future. Be very, very careful. Marriage is a tremendous financial risk in today's society. Know how you will be able to provide for your wife and any future children you will have. They will depend on you to take care of them. Make sure that you are taking steps in your career and your finances to secure the welfare of your wife and your future children. Marriage is not a test of patience. Patience is for non-marriage relationships. Marriage is a test of tolerance. Know the difference. Pick your battles. Ask yourself, "Is this really worth fighting about?" It is always better to ask for forgiveness than permission. If you don't want a task, never do it will. For example, if you're good at mopping a floor, but you hate doing it, then don't do a great job of mopping the floor - you'll get stuck with the job.
Congrats. Been married a little over 3. Communication is extremely important and remember that chicks are inherently irrational.
Hahaha, Viagra, Levitra & Cialis*. Nice one, Tex.. this wins for funniest post of the thread! Seriously, thanks for all the advice! Lots of good stuff here, keep it coming. *RocketMan Tex, do you have a link? Thanks in advance.
