Sounds like you blame your mom the most but what about your dad? Where is he playing in all this?? Doesn't he have any say-so at all? Why all the resent on your mom but not your father? Can't you talk to him? Or are you just real mad about how your mom goes to your sisters and lies to them, can't you dad step in and tell your sister the truth? I've learned long ago that you need to keep your hopes high, and up.. As long as you tread threw the hardtimes there will be light at the end, I know it sounds a little clee-shay(spelling? lol) but it is the dam truth I can't really say that 'everything happens for a reason' but I can say that everything works out at the end. Maybe not always to you but your time will come. When my ex g/f left to england to go to some college there I stayed here, it was a tuff decision but I knew I was to young to make that decision to move there. Through those hard times I said 'everything is going to work out one way or another for the good' and it did. I haven't seen her again but I do know how shes doing.. She's a graduate, shes married, and shes extremely happy... I know I couldn't of given her the life she has now if I left with her, vice-versa things are working out for me aswell and I'll soon graduate and hopefully get a good paying job Don't throw your fists up in anger, stay true, hopes high, ready to take on life. No-one on this board is ganna have an answer for you, you got to figure it out for yourself.. but I'm glad you posted because it's good for me to know that you know that we have your back What you should do honestly is sit down with both your parents, tell them your scared about the future and your career and how you don't want to rely on a man to carry you through life but to be able to carry yourself through life with your own salary if you so choose. Let them know your desire and goals, their alot older, maybe they can offer advice or anything.. Sit down and talk to them, explain to them everything I did that exact same thing with my father one night (we never saw eye to eye so it was tuff), and he really helped me gather a gameplan together, he finally understood
Dude I really feel for you. If I had the money I would be happy to pay for your tuition. Maybe in a few years...
Like I said, I don't hate or resent my mom, I'm just really hurt by what she did. I don't care about the money. Sure it's a problem, but its just money. Don't get me started with my dad. He works, pays bills, spoils himself and sleeps around. That's about all he does or ever has done. He has no part in this because he never promised me money or said he was going to do anything about my education. The day that my windshield broke and they said they wouldn't help me with anything, I talked to my mom and asked for her help. I told her I didn't need her money, just her help. And she said, "NO, find a way to do it yourself. We won't help you." My mother has always done this. Every difficult time in my life, she has left it for me to sort through myself. It wasn't really what I wanted, but it has made me a stronger person. I've tried talking to them, but my dad is more interested in a soccer game and my mom isn't concerned with my problems.
i wont even try to read all of this but it looks like your parents are not the answer. Transfer to a small college town. You will make some friends. Have some fun. Learn. You can do it.
I really don't what to say except I feel for you and you should not put faith in people that aren't trustworthy even if they are your parents. My wife had to learn that the hard way. If her parents were any worse, we would have a WTF thread about them. She still has a relationship with them but its more a friendly relationship than a family relationship. She just doesn't get involved with the drama and doesn't give a crap what they think. She lives her life her way, and if they want to part of it, they have to abide by her rules.
I've treated my parents kinda the same way SP's parents treat her. I mooched off of them as much I could, lied to them alot, took them for granted, showed very little love or appreciation when growing up...especially to my dad, and eventually wore them down to the point that they are grateful for any appearance from me at their house when all I really want is free food. I think the world of my Mom, because she gives me unconditional love, and to me a mother with unconditional love is greater then God or Jesus to which she constantly preaches in my ear about. My dad, on the other hand, I always thought took shortcuts while I was growing up and was a cheapskate in general when raising me. I never really learned anything from my dad other then being a cheapskate and farting alot. Lately, he's been making a point to greet me whenever he sees me, but I just give a half hearted "hey" reply. The bad thing is that I lumped my mother with my dad in my apathetic attitude towards him, because they are a package deal.
Tell your parents you'll remember all this when they need a nursing home and that you'll be sure to watch Marvin Zindler to find out exactly where to send them. Then move out.
you might want to get out on your own like Meowgi said. Sounds like you are strong, independent and driven so you should be fine. Good luck.
