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Learn basketball from the best!!

Discussion in 'Houston Rockets: Game Action & Roster Moves' started by thedreamshake99, Jan 5, 2000.

  1. A-Train...

    You forgot to mention that the first 100 callers recieve an autographed box of Rogaine from the master of the moving pick himself, Karla Malone.
     
  2. heypartner

    heypartner Member

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    Great! This series will go well with my

    "How to Control the Block with Your Fists"
    featuring Kevin Willis.

    and

    "You can Coach the Refs, Too"
    by Phil Jackson and Pat Riley with illustrations using Michael Jordan


    Forgot to add...fun stuff A-train. Thanks for letting us "aboard".



    [This message has been edited by heypartner (edited January 05, 2000).]
     
  3. bballfanatic

    bballfanatic Member

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    Nice. Bump.
     
  4. Rocketball

    Rocketball Member
    Supporting Member

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    Warning!!!! Warning!!! Warning!!!!

    A-train and his company are nothing but complete frauds, and should be put out of buisness immediately. I bought the tapes last year for two payments of $29.95, and have applied the techniques he illustrates in his videos to my basketball game.

    After following them closely, I fouled out of my last two games, for what the ref said was setting moving picks (you know, from the Vin Baker Tapes). The techniques do not work, I am telling you, I mean warning you, they do not work.

    Just take this as friendly advice from a Rocket fan.

    Wait a second, come to think about it, the basketball team I play for is called the Rockets... and as you know... Rockets can never get a good call, in any league...

    So, maybe the tapes do work.....

    If not you can buy my new tape:

    "How to get full value out of your technical fouls"

    [This message has been edited by Rocketball (edited January 05, 2000).]
     
  5. Act fast, and A-Train will throw in a pair of original John Flopton butt huggers for the low, low price of 9.99.




    [This message has been edited by thedreamshake99 (edited January 05, 2000).]
     
  6. RocketSiv

    RocketSiv Member

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    You can never get enough butt huggers you know!@
     
  7. A-Train

    A-Train Member

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    Are you tired of losing basketball games?? Do you follow all those silly rules and STILL end up on the losing end more than the winning end?? Well, after watching the tape series The Seattle Sonics Secrets in Professional Basketball, you can learn all the tips and tricks that the experts up in the great Northwest use to win basketball games!!

    After watching the SSSPB, you will learn everything it takes to master the art of the zone defense. Yes, I know what you may be thinking, "Isn't a zone defense ILLEGAL in professional basketball??" Well, technically, yes a zone defense IS illegal in pro basketball, but don't let that stop you from trying it!! You'll learn all about how to clog up the lane with defenders not guarding any particular man. What's that?? The person you're defending is standing above the three point line at the top of the key?? NO PROBLEM!! In the SSSPB video series, we will show you how to stand below the free throw line and not guard anyone....Yes, BELOW the free throw line!! That may sound crazy, but you will get away with it....trust us!!

    Also included in the SSSPB, we'll include the tape Moving Screens Made Easy, taught by NBA veteran and the master of the moving screen, Vin Baker!! Yeah, we know, you may THINK that you have to stand in one spot when setting a pick, but our expert Vin Baker will show you that you don't have to think that way any more!!

    If you don't belive that the SSSPB video series can work for YOU, just hear what other satisfied customers had to say:

    "I was amazed!! I mean, I thought for sure that they would call an illegal defense on me, but now I can roam around anywhere and it has made my game as good as it can be!!"

    "With Vin Baker's tape on moving screens, now I know how to set a moving pick as well as anybody...Sure, the PLAYERS get really mad, but as long as those refs don't call it, it's swell...Thank you, SSSPB!!!"

    So, for only $39.95 plus S&H, you too can learn the secrets of playing basketball the Seattle Sonics way....Order now, operators are standing by!!
     
  8. BrianKagy

    BrianKagy Member

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    Hilarious, A-Train! LOL...

    Also, if I call now, won't I get Vin Baker's pamphlet on how to coast after signing a big contract?

    ------------------
    A broken coffeepot in the dishwasher is worth five stitches in the wrist.
     
  9. Mulder

    Mulder Member

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    If you call within the next ten minutes you will get Scottie Pippen and Bill Walton's latest collaboration "How to be mistaken for a superstar just because you play with one." It has trade secrets such as "I'm not playing for the (insert team here) unless (insert superstar here) plays too, and Bill Walton's secret to winning sixth man awards, "Good game Larry!". Order now and Mulder will personally throw in a set of Ginsu 2000 steak knives. It slices, dices, circumcises, all your cooking needs. Don't wait pick up that phone now!



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    The truth is out there... on the NET.
     
  10. heypartner

    heypartner Member

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    hilarious Rocketman

    "How to get full value out of your technical fouls"

    Featuring the classic lesson:

    "Using Double Technicals When You Need to Leave Early"
    by Dennis Rodman


    [This message has been edited by heypartner (edited January 06, 2000).]
     

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