There's a whole army of them on ESPN's homepage today: http://espn.go.com/columns/wojnarowski/1259045.html http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/preview?gameId=212792432 http://espn.go.com/magazine/vol4no21texas.html http://espn.go.com/magazine/feldman_20011003.html http://espn.go.com/classic/s/2001/1003/1258863.html Hopefully, we'll still be getting attention AFTER the game too! I still don't know how Texas is a 3-pt favorite over a team on a 17-game win streak who beat us 63-14 a year ago.
Great to see my friend Sloan get mentioned in that. He is a really great receiver that I feel should get more touches.
He looks mad! Sooners need chlorine in gene pool, smell bad By Scott McDonald (Daily Texan Columnist) October 04, 2001 Break out the plungers and open up the sewer tanks. The Okies are coming back to Texas, and they're downright atrocious. That big, brown cloud just north of the Red River is not from any dust storm. It is their natural scent that creates this gaseous phenomenon. But just like any other year, the Oklahoma government allows the Sooner football team to take a field trip to the State Fair of Texas. This year their team actually thinks they can beat the Longhorns. Ha. You can't even beat the law of genetics due to your "inbreeding." But before you leave Boreman, Ok., in your dust-covered wagons, we've got a couple of suggestions for you down here in the promised land. First of all, leave your beer at home. Your little 3.2-percent Sunday School punch just doesn't cut it down here in a state where we make our own brew. Try drinking a couple of Shiner Bocks and I'll guarantee that you lightweights are going to be drunker than a herd of waltzing pissants. Second, before you backwoods, creek-bank, stump-jumpin' hillbillies try flirting with our women, remember we have the prettiest in the country. In fact, Playboy rated the nice ladies at the University of Texas as best-looking among all colleges. And since our girls won't give you bastards the time of day, it may be wise to load up your wagons with your best sheep and extra blow-up dolls. For those of you toothless wonders who actually do have girlfriends in Stupidville, don't be surprised if she leaves you in Dallas to hook up with half the Longhorn Hellraisers. Your girl understands that everything is bigger and better in Texas. Heck, we might even bring her to the press box for a halftime show. Texans know how to party and we know how to boast. The leader of our country left his home in Austin for the White House in Washington, D.C. Coincidentally, he's the fourth native Texan to lead this country in the last 50 years (Bush Sr., LBJ and Ike). The only famous folks in Oklahoma were the founding fathers of Hee-Haw. Texas has four of the largest cities in America, and we're the largest state not covered by ice. You primordials have the "world's largest peanut." Shoot, if we were to secede and become our own country, something we are fully capable of doing, then Texas would have the eighth-largest GDP in the world. If you seceded, you'd have the eighth-largest trailer park among third-world countries. But we understand a football game will determine state supremacy. Texans would like to tip our 10-gallon hats to your successful season in 2000. But Bubba, you ticked us off bad last year, and now you're going to feel what it's like to be the new virgin inmate in a Huntsville prison. You couldn't keep your quarterback another year, so you boneheads went and got another player with a similar name. Hybl is no Heupel, and all of your hype will be diminished when your green quarterback steps in against a group of angry Horns. Even without the fierce Texas defense, your signal-caller is terrible. Hybl can't hit the broad side of a Mark Mangino. You know him, right? The Sooner offensive coordinator who weighs roughly 8,600 pounds. He got that big when he ate one of the Indian tribes that wouldn't leave after you Okies ran them off. Mangino is comic relief waiting to happen. He's every columnist's dream. This tub of lard has a wife named Mary Jane and they include their dog in family portraits. Maybe the movie Road Trip was on to something when a dog was smoking some maryjane and wanted pancakes when he got high. We know Tubby, the offensive mind, certainly would not pass up a pancake. Mangino might even be bigger than Bevo, our beloved mascot who took an Oklahoma on the field during the 1999 Big 12 Championship against Nebraska. All the Oklahoma plopped right out of his Sooner, which left a big pile of OU students there just outside of the end zone. And talking about poop brings us to Stoops. Kind of funny how you second-grade dropouts hired a coach that rhymes with your scent of deodorant. To top it off, you brought along his brother to lead the defense. Or is it his cousin, uncle, dad, brother, son, grandpaw, nephew or all of the above? As for academic standards for your team, the only thing Quentin Griffin got on his SAT was a puddle of drool. Our business, law and engineering schools produce CEOs, lawyers and engineers to lead this country. Your meteorology school produces weathermen to give us forecasts that are wrong 90 percent of the time. Here's a forecast for you, one that you can actually count on. Will Texas win? Does a fat dog fart? Ask Mangino. The glory and the nice ladies are coming back to Austin.
i cant wait till saturday OU IS GOING DOWN!!!!!!!! Stoops is overrated and so is their version of Roy Williams, we'll be dropping bombs so regularly OU will think theyre in Japan during WW2. This is the game Chris Simms shuts everyone up for good, and begins our march to Pasadena Hybl doesnt throw a good ball and has trouble reading defenses, i cant wait till he gets properly introduced to derrick johnson, Quentin Jammer and Cory Redding, also our secondary is as good as OU contrary to what ESPN thinks. Ill stick by my prediction HORNS 35 OU 20, PASADENA HERE WE COME!!!
http://www.austin360.com/aas/kelso/1001/100201.html <I> <B>I was born in Oklahoma, but I left there as Sooner I could</B> Tuesday, October 2, 2001 On Saturday, the University of Texas will square off in a big-deal football game in Dallas against Mobilehoma, the next state north of here and the place of my birth. That I was born at Fort Sill, Okla., in 1944 ticks me off because it means "Oklahoma" appears on my passport. This is an embarrassment to anyone who lives in Texas. I should be grateful, though. At my age, I'm lucky it doesn't say "Indian Territory." There are many left-handed compliments you can pay to Jokelahoma. It's the only state cornball enough to have a sappy Broadway musical named after it. The state made mistletoe its state flower; otherwise, everybody in Oklahoma would be too ugly to get kissed. A favorite Oklahoma pickup line? "Nice tooth." Oklahoma — American Indian word for "manufactured home" — is a great place to watch your wobbly box get taken out by a twister. And culture? You know the first word I saw when I drove into Oklahoma a few years ago from Texas on Interstate 44 out of Wichita Falls? BINGO. As I looked north across the Red River, I spotted a large barn on the Oklahoma side with the word "BINGO" painted on it. I understand that Oklahomans debated what word to put on this barn to paint a picture of the state for visitors. It came down to a battle between BINGO and CHAW. Because I was born in Oklahoma, I enjoy going back every, oh, 50 years. Actually, when I decided a few years ago to retrace my roots to my birthplace at an Army hospital at Fort Sill, I turned around at the exit without going into town. A dingy portable toilet storage area next to the highway made me decide I'd seen enough. So, replete from the touring experience, I headed south, back toward Texas. Before I crossed into Texas, however, I got off the highway and stopped in at an understocked discount cigarette store in a cinder block building just north of the Red River. Much of the shelf space was empty. While chatting with the proprietor — a man in his late 20s who said his mother didn't let him out much — a large dog with pale eyes came out from the back room and lay on my feet. "Nice dog," I said. "He's not a dog," the man said. "Oh, yeah, what is he?" I asked. "He's a wolf," the man said. This made me uneasy. "Does he like people?" I asked. "No. You want to buy something?" "Heck, yeah, you got any dog biscuits?" I'm thinking, figuring this wolf eats Texans who are too cheap to make a purchase. I bought a soda and left quickly. One thing I enjoy about going to the Texas-OU game is watching the Okies at the State Fair of Texas in their red clothing. What I find intriguing is that each little cluster of Oklahomans wears a different matching outfit. For example, you'll see a group of three Oklahomans all wearing matching red gym shorts and tank tops. Then you'll see a group of five other Oklahomans in matching red T-shirts and sweat pants. Why is this? The only thing I can figure is that each group of Oklahomans has only one person who can get into town to buy clothes for the whole group. </I>
Thanks for posting today's article from the Texan, Smokey. I started laughing out loud on the bus this morning while reading this.
