No it won't. Your idea about going through the trunk is the best. Finalsbound, If you can turn your keys in the lock both ways, but don't get a response from the locks, then you have electrical lock controls (which would be odd, since that car model should have mechanical lock controls). As long as your battery is dead, then its not going to unlock.
Dang guys. 1. Clean the terminals or replace cables. 2. Take battery to local parts shop (Autozone/Advance) for free battery test. 3. If car is running, remove one terminal. If car stops, it's the alternator. 4. If a battery is completely dead, another car jumping may not provide enough juice. 5. Buy a Mustang.
To tell you the truth, your problem sounds like it's a loose cable or connection somewhere in your system with your battery that appears to go in and out of place when the car moves. That would explain everything. If it was the alternator, your car would not run for very long when you drive it, as the power for everything, including your plugs firing, would be coming straight from the battery. The fact that this only happens after you turn the car off pretty much proves that your alternator is working just fine and the problem lies entirely with your battery and its connections.
(this is finalsbound) This is exactly what we did. When I was at work my roommate finally got in the passenger side door (still a mystery as to why we couldn't get in) and it started. Very puzzling since the electronic key remote wouldn't work at all. No idea how it started, but she took it to Autozone and they said it was the terminals. We cleaned them and now I have to wiggle the red side on the battery to start my car...hehe. Anyways, it works now, hope I don't have TOO many problems in the future... Thanks SO much for all the assistance.