I'm posting this in response to some discussion in the "Asking a girl out" thread. It's a very extensive but interesting (and often very funny) explanation of how girls lump guys into the "dating" category and the "friends" category. Apparently this has been around for a while and may have even been posted on this board a few times before, but I'm sure there are people that haven't seen it. I know I hadn't until last week. So anyway, here it is. It's a long read, but if you can get through the first couple of pages I'm pretty sure you won't stop there, so give it a shot. The Ladder Theory Discussion to follow...
The ladder theory is a good starting point, and I believe it is generally true with most male/female interactions. There's a whole "seduction" subculture on the Internet that's sole purpose is to solve this problem for guys that find themselves on the friend's ladder. Some of the stuff is kind of silly, but some of it rings true. Many of their concepts are starting to get traction in popular culture. More and more, the buzzwords friend zone and "alpha" are being thrown around, terms that are used a lot in seduction circles. My favorite book on the subject is "The Game" by Neil Strauss. A good starting point to learn about dating, social interactions, and the good and bad about the "seduction" community.
The Ladder Theory helped me realize what women really want from a man romanticly. It really helped my single life be a great success and I can even credit it for some good points in my marriage. Most (all) women will probably disagree with the Ladder Theory, because the truth, which I have found to be true 99% of the time, hurts: Women like jerks.
Except this one. Technically it's just a "theory" though, not a "law" so it doesn't have to be 100% accurate all the time every time. I'd say 99.97% of the time.
Strange, but I wrote a eerily similar Chinese version of this 15 years ago back in high school in Calif... But hey it sure is nice to see someone affirming your ideas! I've made a bunch of refinements to the theory since then though, for example, time-varying dynamics, value-masking, and i've also incorporated the techniques commonly referenced in the recent seduction school subculture. personally think that the ladder is an accurate depiction of male-female relationships and the seduction school fluff is merely a mechanism to mask/promote/demonstrate your value. a bunch of us on this bbs are totally alpha males capable of placing high on just about any girl's ladder. we just don't know it. that's where the seduction school stuff come in.
