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When is it cheating?

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by jello77, Jan 7, 2006.

  1. jello77

    jello77 Member

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    i have a question to ask the great minds of the clutchfans bbs. there is a fine line that is drawn whenever you are in a relationship with a girl (or boy), that draws the line between flirtation with another and actual cheating with another. obviously sex of any kind is definatley cheating, but what about the muddled middle?

    is it cheating if your girl is drunk, a guy friend of hers is drunk, and they kiss on the lips? not like full blown make out, jsut a little kiss on the lips. is that fine or is that considered cheating?

    im having an argument with a friend of mine...his girlfriend was making nice with another guy at a party right in front of him. the guy was basically forcing himself onto her, and she wasnt biting at all, but she did give him a little kiss back once. he wants to take her back, but i told him no. what do you guys think? when is it just being flirtatious/drunk and when is it cheating?
     
  2. swilkins

    swilkins Member

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    I'm not sure. What's her phone number?
     
  3. Harrisment

    Harrisment Member

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    I think it depends on the relationship. In your friends case at least, that doesn't sound like a big deal. I'd probably get over that pretty quick (if it even bothered me in the first place.)
     
  4. JumpMan

    JumpMan Member
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    What the hell is wrong with everybody? Today it was my GFs turn to pick a movie, and the movie was rumor has it, in that the main chick cheats on his fiance with some dude who slept with her grandma and her mother, and in the end the fiance takes her HO ASS back! WTF?! And then we might see some movie where Spiderman's best friend plays some stupid knight who is willing to force a relationship with some chick despite starting a war over it. WTF?! Madness! Selfishness! That's why your buddy's chick expects him to stay with her. Stupid Hollywood.
     
  5. swilkins

    swilkins Member

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    If it hurt your friend bad enough, it might complicate any future that relationship might have. He's probably better moving on.
     
  6. Invisible Fan

    Invisible Fan Member

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    Depends on how long you've been together...

    Flirting is a grey line, but any form of touching seems to indicate both know where its headed. The, "I was drunk," excuse is pretty lame, IMO.

    So yeah, if one thinks that instance is a big deal while the other doesn't, he/she should probably find someone else since their differing views on relationships will end up in trouble down the line.
     
  7. droxford

    droxford Member

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    The simple fact that she kissed the guy is just an indication of deeper underlying issues.

    If I was your friend, I'd nail her one last time (dress her up in lingerie, give her an all-night'er and videotape the whole thing) and then dump her ass and move on.
     
  8. meggoleggo

    meggoleggo Member

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    It's cheating when either a) you feel guilty for what you've done, or b) you clearly upset the other person and thus throw the relationship into jeopardy.

    Personally, I'd say depending on the kiss, I'd consider it cheating. A little friendly platonic peck for New Years - no big deal. Mugging down on someone, regardless of sobriety, is totally cheating.
     
  9. FranchiseBlade

    Supporting Member

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    I would pretty much agree with this. A plutonic peck as a greeting or parting is nothing. A peck with some other feeling behind it is grounds to consider it cheating.
     
  10. vwiggin

    vwiggin Member

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    Please tell me your friend kicked that guy's ass.
     
  11. glad_ken

    glad_ken Member

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    It doesn't sound like that big of deal to me. Just let her know that this kind of behavior is unacceptable in the future if it bugs him that much....
     
  12. pasox2

    pasox2 Member
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    It's never cheating. No one owns another person.
     
  13. moestavern19

    moestavern19 Member

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    different area codes, peanut butter, dogs, testicles etc. you guys are a couple years late.
     
  14. TMac640

    TMac640 Contributing Member

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    how you gonna take a ho to a hotel.
     
  15. Cohen

    Cohen Member

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    Totally depends.

    I wouldn't steer him too strongly, just help him figure out what's best for him & them. Help him analyze the situation logically, what occurred, why and what does it mean? What does his GF mean to him? What kind of relationship do they have? blah blah...
     
  16. Cohen

    Cohen Member

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    Committment <> Ownership

    If you want to break a committment, you do it before cheating.
     
  17. ClutchCityReturns

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    I didn't take the time to read this particular post, but here is my response to the thread's title...

    Cheating is anything you wouldn't be willing to tell your significant other about.

    This is, of course, assuming that you have decent morals and a conscience.


    Examples:

    If you are in a pretty open relationship and kissing someone else out of a dare or whatever is cool with your significant other, then that's not cheating.

    If you do that same thing but it's not something that your significant other approves of, then it's cheating.

    So it's all subjective, really.
     
  18. Cohen

    Cohen Member

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    One person being upset does not constitute cheating.

    E.g., I once was at a party w/o my GF and a girl kept asking me to dance. A slow song came on and I said no, which pissed the girl off, but I had already told her about my GF. When my GF found out that I had danced w/ this girl several times (and that she was a dancer in Cats :) ...go ahead, insert macbeth joke), she freaked. She had been cheated on before was was irrational about it.
     
  19. bottlerocket

    bottlerocket Member

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    Let me get this straight, she is a drunk and a flirt?
     
  20. tested911

    tested911 Member

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    When is it cheating?

    Easy Answer...

    It's when you have to ask when is it cheating ;)
     

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