Has anyone here ever gone through a Roman Catholic marriage annulment (marriage declared invalid)? If so, what is the process like? I've done the research and made the calls and I know it takes 6-9 months to complete, but what are the interviews like. There's no point in asking how to get one "approved" since I'll only be speaking the truth, but what can I expect during the actual process?
Good question - how easy are annulments to get? I thought it was mainly a bunch of paperwork and interviews... in my case, I'm not Catholic so I would consider a civil divorce to count, but the other party is. I don't want him to feel like he can't get married again, since that wouldn't be fair. I guess I could just leave first, then I could be the "bad guy" and he could blame everything on me, and surely he would be granted an annulment after that, right? As for me, just as long as I don't marry another Catholic... (FT, I assume this is just clearing up business from the ex, and not anything going wrong with your current situation... right?)
I don't think it's easy. My sister-in-laws' husband came out of the closet after 10 years of marriage and two kids. They said they wouldn't annul that...
I don't know anything about what the Catholic church is actually doing, but aren't annulments essentially for marriages that are never consummated? Assuming you were 'really married', like in Isabel's case, I wouldn't think annulment was an option. Or, has it become a convenient way for Catholics to get divorced without calling it a divorce? The Bible allows 2 circumstances to justify a divorce (justified for the offended party, that is): adultery and abandonment by a nonbelieving spouse. Does the Catholic church allow divorces on these grounds? If Isabel, for example, were to take on a new beau, would Ferdinand be granted by the Church a divorce that would allow him to remarry? Or, if she were to just file for divorce and move out and leave the Church (if she were ever a member), would that be sufficient? In a conservative protestant church, it would be enough to justify remarrying by the offended party, but I don't know about the Catholic church.
My Dad left my Mom for some Israeli 22-year old and the church wouldnt give my Mom the annulment unless she and Dad had some counselling and went thru some sort of church program. They preached forgiveness and reconcilliation. Not quite sure why running off with a another woman isnt abandonment, but the Lord works in mysterious ways, I guess. Needless to say, my Mom is the first person in my family to quit the Catholic church.
I was married for 7 years, we were Catholic. My parents kept bugging me to get an annulment for a few years. I know it cost money, that is the part that pisses me off. I have heard any where from 200 dollars to 800. WHY??? I am still Catholic and will be getting remarried next spring and I will not get an annulment.
I've never understood this. Marriage to a Christian isn't a piece of paper...it's a commitment. If someone abandons that commitment, the marriage is done. It doesn't matter who files papers...it matters who deserted the marriage. Jesus preached so much about not getting caught up in the outward things and remembering the real substance of things. For example...he preached that you weren't keeping the commandment of "thou shalt not murder" if you were harboring hatred for someone in your heart...because at your heart, you are a murderer if you are. So when I hear something like this coming from the church...where form seems to triumph over substance...i'm baffled.
I thought Catholics (or is it Orthodex Christians?!) could never get divorced unless one commits adultry (or something to that effect). Ah, ignore me.
I think...think because it's been awhile since I heard this... that the only grounds for an anullment in the catholic church were adultery and spousal abuse, and that would occur only after counseling deemed the marraige irreconcilable.
Well technically... I think... the Catholic Church doesn't allow divorces...or rather I'll put it this way. If you want to get a divorce and you're Catholic, then go right ahead. But if you get married again the Catholic Church won't recognize it. That's why you have to get an anullment. And if I'm wrong about this I apoligize... this isn't one of my strongest subjects concerning the Church...but I'm pretty sure this is what I've been told.
I believe that's correct; you can get divorced, but you just need the annulment to be able to marry again within the Catholic church. I wonder if it just depends which priest or which marriage tribunal you get, in terms of how easy it is. There are other grounds for annulment, including something about immaturity of one or both parties at the time - in other words, they didn't know what they were doing or weren't in a sufficiently good state of mind to recognize it. (If you were depressed or codependent and made a bad choice for that reason, does it count? please?) While I understand marriage is supposed to be a commitment, sometimes I believe you make a mistake and marry the wrong person or otherwise get involved in an unhealthy, destructive relationship. If you can't get out of it any other way, sooner or later you will probably commit adultery just so you can have that "out". Not perfect, I know, but sometimes there are no right ways around a situation.
Sorry...forgot to mention it was in dealing with the ex. Tara and I are happy as can be and just have this issue before us. As far as an annulment, what I understand is that annulment isn't a term that is accurate, but still used. The Church believes that man can not do a marriage in the eyes of God. The term now used is declaring a marriage invalid, basically meaning that there was something that did not allow the marriae to be recognized in the eyes of the Church...being forced into the marriage, too immature to make that decision, marriage formed through lies, or other circumstances that were not known at the time of marriage that would have a negative effect on the marriage. I'm beginning the paperwork and intend to submit it to my diocese and Tribunal. I'll keep you all posted.
Just hack the database. We are talking about Catholics here. They won't know what hit 'em. and if they find out, they have to forgive you.
I've tried it and it's a long process with a lot of detailed questions. With everything you have to do you might feel like you're getting divorced all over again. If the other party will not participate you still need "witnesses" to back up the story as to why things didn't work out. It gets very personal but I suggest keeping things as general as possible. Tell them what they want to hear and not much more. When I did it some one in the diocese accidentally sent my 'confidential' comments to my ex. Even though she was willing to participate it dredged up a lot of crap. Not fun. I wasn't Catholic and neither the ex but I wanted to marry a Catholic woman and needed this done to get hitched in the Church. I'm practically an expert on cannon law now. Eventually, it was easier to get baptised Catholic (which 'wiped out' the past). Then we got married in the Church. Good luck.
Thanks for the info. With cooperation, will that make things easier, or is better to just do it on my own. I know she has to be informed of the petition anyways, but I would rather have her involved as little as possible. Congrats on your first post. Welcome to the hangout.
Just curious but is anyone here Coptic Orthodox? I've heard that adultery is the only grounds for divorce in that sect as well, I believe.
