Am I getting played?

I bet the girlfriend or ex girlfriend is just thick with a banging body… lol

 

Sure. Everyone can be illogical and irrational. You asked for advice here and that’s my advice. I get it you want the best for your kid. He’s an adult he can make his own decisions especially about who he loves even if they don’t match your standards of beauty.

 

Being 20 lbs overweight is a socially acceptable norm now. Go walk around Target and look at the fashion model signs. Drive by a High School when school is out. Walk around a college campus during the day.

Personality > looks, within reason. If she takes care of herself, meaning not a slob or morbidly obese, what difference does it make if there’s love and happiness?

 

I’m willing to bet that’s Gen-X or older millennials. Zoomers are a generational cohort of an entirely different stripe. Different values, needs and wants from life.

 

Not even.

A lot of millennials are size wise all over the map and they are far less judgmental that Boomers and early Gen Xers.

It is just way down on the list of concerns when it comes to a loving relationships.

 

One thing not yet mentioned that troubles me a bit is that this is a public BBS forum. It would be pretty easy for your son (and his g/f) to find and read all these comments. So, even though you said it is something that you keep to yourself (or with the other stepdad) there is significant risk of it coming into the open. They may already have read it.

 

Fatty's son and Chad kicked it off and are doling out the hot goss.

 

I was thinking about this a bit more and the 'style' for Zoomers is 'just rolled out of bed in the clothes I wore to bed' slob. They give two ***** about their personal appearance.

Or if they do give a F it's the puffy bangs on guys, pancake makeup & fake eyelashes on girls @jiggyfly But even in that instance their clothes are like they pulled them out from under the bed.

 

Maybe you should hook up with a fat broad and set up a double date?

It'd be like a Curb episode where you play dumb about your comments and let your son tease out the misunderstanding.

 

There is something to be concerned about if a woman is overweight. You can't just say stop being shallow unless the issue is just aesthetic. Beyond health, there's probably a lack of self-control, a difficulty saying no, self-confidence issues, bad attitudes, difficulty committing, bad habits, negative coping mechanisms, and to top it off you might have fat babies.

 

He said himself that his son could do better because she is 20 pounds overweight. Nothing else. He never mentioned if she makes his son happy. Or if she is nice, caring, loves him, treats him well. Just the fact (in his opinion) that she is 20 pounds overweight. No mention of her height/weight/body composition, etc.

 

A lot of people simply have no idea how to eat properly.

I bet you 90% or more of kids are raised on Cocoa Puffs, fast food, and junk -- just like they were in our day because that's what's marketed at kids, and it's all too easy for parents to give in (plus feeding kids ain't cheap). For many, girls especially, they can eat whatever the hell they want when they're young. Then... boom... their metabolism turns against them, or suddenly they're having to work long hours, study, etc. Only no one taught them how to eat for optimum health. (I took Home Ec. in school and all we were taught was how to bake cookies and cakes.)

Making matters worse, people are eating out more than ever, everything is a chain serving shitty food, and many are way too inactive for their own good.

But everyone knows all this.

I was doing my best to eat right at that age, taking supplements and exercising hoping to look like Arnold Schwarzenegger, but I still got fat. It took a crisis to finally wake me up to eating right, but there's still much I don't know.

As for this girl, twenty pounds is not much at all. Go look at some before and after photos of people that dropped 20. For most it's not a dramatic difference. And besides, you know what's going to shrink if and when she loses the weight, right?

 

@bobrek, you seem like a reasonable guy. Out of curiosity, are you retired now, and what did you do for a living?

 

OP might be shallow, who knows, but it isn't a completely shallow point of view.

 

You think it isn't? Saying that one's son can do better simply because a woman (in his opinion) is 20 pounds overweight and giving absolutely no reason other than that, isn't shallow? Pretty sure that even he agrees it is shallow.

 

I just hit my 5th year of retirement. Retired at 59. Spent most of my 42 years of full time work (age 18-59) in software support for Control Data and Cray Supercomputing.

 

He said he's shallow, that's true, I'm commenting on the point of view in general.

 

You think, in general, that the point of view of a parent who thinks someone isn't good enough for their child on the sole basis that they may be 20 pounds overweight isn't shallow?