Thanks for the responses. This is something I hadn't thought about, but it does appear like a different attitude towards work can eliminate some of the stress and anxiety that I feel. By most objective measures my work environment isn't really that bad, and is mostly good. I just have a lot on my plate, and I have a hard time dealing with the pressure and the feeling that I need to do well to match up to my company's expectations. I'll give therapy a shot as my company offers it for free.
Sounds like you have more pros than cons if that's the case, which is good. If it's a large workload that's the issue, maybe talk to your boss about it? I don't know if like the workload is negotiable or anything like that though. Maybe not. That, and also a question popped into my head, is anyone badgering you about getting stuff done? Or do you think it's largely in your head? Because badgering is the worst, but if it's in your head to a large degree... that's something that can be worked on
Your health should be priority #1 before the rest. It doesn't matter how much someone makes if that is suffering. You're not spending anything if the unfortunate happens
Seems like the general advice here is to stick it out. I disagree with that. Your situation sounds a little similar to mine a few years ago, with the exception being that the money I was making was good but not great. I worked at a prestigious company, one that everyone in the world knows. I got along great with my coworkers, some of whom became real friends. It certainly wasn't a terrible environment (I mean I wasn't coal mining or anything) but it was stressful and I hated going in to work each day. In my case, I hated the job itself. It wasn't what I wanted to do but I was doing well enough in life that it was difficult for me to walk away. However, one day I did walk away and went in a completely different direction in my career. It was an adjustment but in very short time I knew it was 100% the right move. In fact, I was a little pissed at myself for having stayed at that other place for so long (7 years overall, but 3 years in that last shitty role). I will never again take a job that I am not genuinely interested in and that I do not like. I didn't realize it at the time, but the stress from that job and the general misery that it gave me absolutely seeped into other aspects of my life. The worst of which is that I later realized that I spent less time with my first child when she was an infant than I could have, because I dedicated so much time to working. That's something I still think about and regret several years later: I had not only deprived myself of that amazing time but also put an unfair burden on my wife, all to serve a company that didn't give a **** about me. Nowadays I am in the best paying job I have ever had, even though that place I left was allegedly a great place to make money. I have very high expectations of my work environment now. I demand good money, excellent work-life balance, a good dynamic with my boss, and a good amount of autonomy over how I do my job. I also only work for companies that I believe in and only do roles that I am actually legitimately interested in. If even one of those boxes isn't checked then I am out the door. I am no longer thankful just to be a guy at a "great" company. So my advice would be to put yourself and your well-being first. I would never discourage anyone from seeking therapy, but I would also say that you should at least look around and go on some interviews. Apply to some jobs that you would be happy to do and see what happens from there. You might realize you like where you're at after all, but you also might find that a happier life can be had elsewhere. No harm can come from applying and doing interviews.
Solid advice as well. I think the majority of the advice being stick it out or stick it out a little longer is decent advice as well because it sounds like OP does not hate his coworkers, or boss (es) and makes great money. For those reasons, I'd recommend staying at least until he can get some therapy in and see if it's time to bounce as an option. At the end of the day, like I said, therapy did not help significantly for me but I had a different situation. I had a shitty department with my teammates and a shitty boss, as well as shitty HR. So no amount of therapy in the world got me past those stumbling blocks. The pay was good, not great. Now the pay is great with this new job. I think what the stick it out camp (including myself to a degree) is saying is that look there's a few options. 1) Quit, but make sure you've got something lined up before you quit or 2) wait a little bit, get into some therapy and see if you still wanna bounce, and if you do that's fine.
I would quit my job if the entire city of Houston hated me and believed me to be a con-man that ruined my roster of employees and alienated my best workers. But first, I would have the character to hold a press conference and own up to my crimes, and I certainly wouldn't use twitter as a platform to act oblivious to public sentiment.
Since your Lord and Savior delivered those words during the Sermon on the Mount, they're supposed to be in red letters. I swear, kids these days.
No sense in killing yourself for a business you don't own. Get your linkedn going and watch the recruiters pour in. TO answer your question about what would make me quit? If i needed to homeschool my kids.
There's a lot on your plate at work? Is it too much- does your company have metrics to measure workload? If you're doing more than you can handle you need to: Analyze your workload using either your company's built-in metrics, or find them online. Managers like it when you come with not only a problem but a solution. Do that same analysis for your coworkers in secret, so you have a reference point. You may have more than them, or they may all be overworked. Both are red flags. Prepare a document outlining why your workload is too high. Talk to your supervisor about either getting some off your plate or getting help prioritizing the work. Emphasize how you like your job, etc, but you need some help. Your company needs to know that you're overworked if that's the case. If they don't agree with your salient analysis, time to hit the street and find a new job. But don't carry those hard feelings into your next interview or job.
My work related mental health improved drastically once I started working from home more. I had started doing that even before Covid and I felt a difference almost immediately. My career is naturally high stress on the daily, but being removed from the office environment and other people worked wonders. It's not even that my work environment was particularly toxic, but being at home just put me a whole new level of comfort. I also believe that shorter/eliminated daily commutes are an enormous difference maker. The fatigue, time, and annoyances that go with commuting to and from work can change your mood for the rest of the day, ESPECIALLY on the way home. I feel I have longer evenings now, and more energy to do things during those longer evenings.
I was looking for a job, and then I found a job And heaven knows I'm miserable now In my life Why do I give valuable time To people who don't care if I live or die?
The counterpoint is it gives your more time to work depending on you situation. Just roll out of bed to the chair in your home office.
Going to therapy to somehow feel better about your stressful job is one of the most American& corporate culture things I've ever heard, nice.
If we had as many vacation days as you had in Europe, maybe we wouldn't need therapy. But that'll never happen
Just put your resume on linkedin in. If you are in software you will get like 5-10 recruiters hitting you up every week. Even some of these smaller startups are offering pay packages >200k. Unless you are living in a high COL place you should be able to do ok with a little lower salary. With the amount of people hitting you up if you have a full time job it might be hard to get through all the interviews especially if you have a 3-4 interviews scheduled in a week. If there was a time to quit a job without one lined up it might be now. Market is pretty hot. However there is no guarantee so maybe you should have a bunch of interviews lined and take a week off to do them. Life is too short for a shitty job especially when there are so many opportunities out there.
