I'm planning to propose to my girlfriend of 2 years sometime in the near future. There are some pretty big things I have to get squared away first though and maybe you gents can assist me. I have pretty much got the ring thing settled and planned but I may need some extra help in that subject later on and when I do I'll just post it in this thread. I have also planned the way I am going to propose, very original I think. The thing I'm having trouble is how to ask the father for permission. I know it may sound stupid but that is the thing that is bothering me the most. How do you do it, what way do you bring it up? Do I just call him up and tell him, hey I got something important to ask you?Do you just flat out ask or beat around the bush for a minute. Any particular setting? Anything I shouldn't do? Any advice would be appreciated. Thank you in advance!
You aren't marrying the father, so why ask his permission? It might be courteous to invite him to lunch or something and tell him that you are planning on proposing to his daughter, and perhaps request his blessing. However, I would certainly not say something like "I would like to ask your permission to marry Cindy." It's not his decision to make.
Tell him how much you love his daughter and what she means to you and then ask him. Over dinner would be good.
Hey I'm just going by what the 7 out of 8 women told me, if you want to do it right ask the father first. I don't see any need doing it but my girlfriend's sister said I should ask too and she told me not that her father would care but he would appreciate me asking.
Try to do it in person. Just be straightforward and open. I didn't necessarily do it as an ask-for-permission kind of thing, either. I let him know that I intended to propose and wished for his blessing. Good luck.
i agree with fadeaway. you are gonna mary his daughter not him. so if you really wanna ask him for permision then do not make a to big of deal of it. do you ever speak with him when nobody else is around? like do you ever have a drink with him? if so then you can just say it then. if not then just talk to him. and say it.
If you're both, say, college-age, go ahead and ask the Dad. If you're beyond college and both living your own lives, get engaged and then make the first call to her parents.
And... don't ask permission... there's no dowry involved. Just tell him. And don't give him any lead time to consult with the Mom and phone your gal. Call him by cell right before you pick her up and then say "Honey, let's have a special evening... we don't need our cells tonight."
keeley's correct...... It's not a permission thing, is a respect thing. Ask for Pop's blessing......you will be starting off on the right foot with the in laws. Sure, you'll screw it up with them down the road, but starting strong is important.
Or if talking computer problems isn't good, you can always talk religion (but he may not be a Christian - not that there is anything wrong with it, just messing with you). Pretty good advice - I'll just say how do you get along with her father now? Do you ever spend time with her AND her family or is it always been with her? If you have spent some time with her parents, I don't see why this would be hard unless they don't like you for some reason.
I go hunting with her father, when the season is in, and do spend a good deal of time with them. They seem to like me but you just never know. I'm just really afraid of hearing no.
Whatever happens, don't propose to her during the halftime show at midcourt. You might end up on the news.
I don't see anything wrong with asking his permission. It is a matter of respect, and most fathers will appreciate it. No way he says no to you, because then he looks like an A$$. Just be polite and respectful, and ask for his permission. At least that is what I did, and my father in law is the biggest A$$hole on the planet. But his daughter is a sweetie !! DD
Well, honestly, unless he is the biggest two-face in the world, I don't see why he would go out hunting with someone he doesn't like. And asking for his permission will only make you look better in his eyes, I think. So, you are worrying over nothing - you got it made, dude.
I agree with rimrocker, the younger you are the better it is to ask dad, but if you're mid-20s or above I don't think it would be the end of the world if you didn't. I personally popped the question to my gf and then called her mom first and then her dad (parents divorced.) It was an interesting situation, she is very close with her mom and grew up with her, so I would have felt bad leaving the woman who raised her out of the decision if I asked her dad. If her parents were still married then maybe it would have been different. On one final note, I thought asking would be easy, it was the right time, place, etc., but I still got BIG TIME butterflies, so make sure you have a few drinks first
To be safe, after you ask his permission, regardless of his answer - I'd lay off the hunting with him for a while. At least until after the wedding.
