1. Welcome! Please take a few seconds to create your free account to post threads, make some friends, remove a few ads while surfing and much more. ClutchFans has been bringing fans together to talk Houston Sports since 1996. Join us!

Hemhorroids

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by Roscoe Arbuckle, Aug 23, 2019.

  1. Roscoe Arbuckle

    Joined:
    Aug 15, 2014
    Messages:
    5,285
    Likes Received:
    2,957
    Got my first hemhorroid flare-up today. Oh. My. God. The pain is excrutiating. As in, I've come close to fainting a couple times. Preperation H does nothing!

    Anyone have other options for these? Not sure I can take this pain for 1-2 weeks.

    TMI?
     
  2. Nook

    Nook Member

    Joined:
    Jun 27, 2008
    Messages:
    59,708
    Likes Received:
    132,013
    Avoid anal sex.

    A coffee enema will help.
     
    FLASH21, Buck Turgidson, IBTL and 2 others like this.
  3. Roscoe Arbuckle

    Joined:
    Aug 15, 2014
    Messages:
    5,285
    Likes Received:
    2,957
    Lol. Never done anything anally, other than a couple girls using a finger. Definitely not my thing.

    No way in hell I'm doing any type of enema. At this pain level, I could actually faint if I tried anything like that.
     
  4. LonghornFan

    LonghornFan Member

    Joined:
    Sep 16, 2002
    Messages:
    15,718
    Likes Received:
    2,628
    I had something bad a year ago and nothing worked. Out of desperation I bought this on Amazon. In 3 days I was in the clear and honestly after 1 application felt immediate relief, but you have to dab it on your fingers and rub in it, feeling the roids. Wonderful experience. This stuff worked though and I quit drinking Tequila. Everyone gets them, I'm not embarrassed about it.

    [​IMG]
     
    tmoney1101 and Roscoe Arbuckle like this.
  5. Roscoe Arbuckle

    Joined:
    Aug 15, 2014
    Messages:
    5,285
    Likes Received:
    2,957
    Thanks! I'm willing to try anything at this point.
     
  6. ThatBoyNick

    ThatBoyNick Member

    Joined:
    Dec 8, 2011
    Messages:
    31,084
    Likes Received:
    48,653
    You're gonna want to ease up on the fast-food mate.
     
  7. LonghornFan

    LonghornFan Member

    Joined:
    Sep 16, 2002
    Messages:
    15,718
    Likes Received:
    2,628
    Honestly I could barely walk, let alone concentrate on work for almost 3 weeks. When it arrived I immediately rubbed it on and felt instant relief. The entire pain was gone in 3 days and i was back to normal, and that was after going to the dr, paying $300 for ointment that did nothing, and the pain was excruciating. No idea why this worked so well but its money.
     
    Roscoe Arbuckle likes this.
  8. Exiled

    Exiled Member

    Joined:
    Dec 20, 2013
    Messages:
    5,099
    Likes Received:
    1,264
    Daflon500
     
    Nook likes this.
  9. Roscoe Arbuckle

    Joined:
    Aug 15, 2014
    Messages:
    5,285
    Likes Received:
    2,957
    Weird about the tequila. I have a buddy who is a fitness freak, and when he drinks, it is only tequila and natural fruit juices because he feels that because it is made from agave it is the most natural alcohol. I have no idea if that is correct, though.
     
  10. bobrek

    bobrek Politics belong in the D & D

    Joined:
    Sep 16, 1999
    Messages:
    36,288
    Likes Received:
    26,645
    There are two types that flare up. Internal and external. If the internal ones don't go away, you can have them banded. In and out (pun intended) in less than 30 seconds. External ones are another story. They don't want to do the surgery and you don't want to have it. Apparently painful. Long recovery. They may come back.

    I recommend this...

    Screenshot_20190824-075048_Amazon Shopping.jpg
     
    Nook likes this.
  11. Surfguy

    Surfguy Member

    Joined:
    Sep 23, 1999
    Messages:
    24,457
    Likes Received:
    12,703
    I recommend sitting like this to force the blood away from your anal cavity. It can be a little awkward at first...especially in work meetings...but it really does help.

    [​IMG]
     
  12. Newlin

    Newlin Member

    Joined:
    May 22, 2015
    Messages:
    8,789
    Likes Received:
    11,155
    [​IMG]
    [​IMG]
    Metamucil and Tucks medicated pads are a must.
     
  13. Torn n Frayed

    Torn n Frayed Member

    Joined:
    Oct 31, 2008
    Messages:
    4,744
    Likes Received:
    1,585
    For a few months I was eating this frozen salmon that had all kinds of spiciness in it, the culo hasn't been the same since. Developed an anal fissure so me and Kaz Matsui are close boys now. TnP's, I recommend Desitin also....
     
  14. Andre0087

    Andre0087 Member

    Joined:
    Jan 16, 2012
    Messages:
    9,983
    Likes Received:
    13,634
    Stay away from any alcoholic beverages.
     
  15. Xerobull

    Xerobull ...and I'm all out of bubblegum
    Supporting Member

    Joined:
    Jun 18, 2003
    Messages:
    36,769
    Likes Received:
    35,606
    [​IMG]

    Witch hazel- you can get it at any drug store. Miracle cure- only thing that helped my wife after she gave birth.


    BTW, a few years ago I rolled out a software package that interfaced with endoscopy procedures, and sat in on (no pun intended) about 100 procedures. The in-joke with the nurses, almost just a mantra, was that everyone has hemorrhoids, and that taking your phone to the pooper is a big offender because you're sitting on the toilet longer. No feedback on if the Squatty Potty helps.
     
    BigShasta and Roscoe Arbuckle like this.
  16. No Worries

    No Worries Member

    Joined:
    Jun 30, 1999
    Messages:
    32,752
    Likes Received:
    20,509
    Have you tried sex with super models? I hear that that cures most ills.

    You could have anal fissures, especially if you have seen any blood when you wipe. I have had them and found nothing that would take the edge off the pain. The seat donut mentioned above helps. Being regular helps. Avoid constipation and diarrhea. I also started using wet wipes, since they cause less irritation. Siting in a tub of hot water for 30 minutes before bed also helps.
     
  17. jo mama

    jo mama Member

    Joined:
    Jul 9, 2002
    Messages:
    14,581
    Likes Received:
    9,095
    at least the pain of the hemorrhoids takes your mind of your severe case of herpes for awhile!

    in all seriousness, i had a hemorrhoid once in july 1998. the fact that 20+ years later i can clearly remember the month/year should be an indicator of how much of a disruption it was in my life.
     
    jboslett and CometsWin like this.
  18. Pole

    Pole Houston Rockets--Tilman Fertitta's latest mess.

    Joined:
    Feb 15, 1999
    Messages:
    8,566
    Likes Received:
    2,730
    Green curry at Thai Gourmet. Tell the server Thai hot is WAY too mild.
     
    ThatBoyNick likes this.
  19. Space Ghost

    Space Ghost Member

    Joined:
    Feb 14, 1999
    Messages:
    18,090
    Likes Received:
    8,535
    Here is to hoping you never get a kidney stone.
     
  20. Invisible Fan

    Invisible Fan Member

    Joined:
    Dec 5, 2001
    Messages:
    45,954
    Likes Received:
    28,046
    Skip the booze wine, and replace with...

    Prune juice.

    It's a warrior's drink.
     

Share This Page