Things you wish you'd been told or advised upon becoming a dad

Treat them equally. Don't favor one over the other.

Once you discipline and say that you will do something, you follow through.

 

Don't take their health for granted. Enjoy it every day, and inasmuch as you can, stay on top of it. Not going into details here, but I have a 5 month old who was born with an issue and is not doing great right now. Major surgery in the near future. So we just go day to day and daddy tries to not die of a panic attack every time there's an issue, which is almost every day.

So cherish it all, even the minor ****-ups that this thread is trying to prevent. It's all part of it.

Oh and also, I like bumbos. It's cool to see tiny babies sitting upright.

 

Don't do it bro lol...

At one point, I was so tired I literally collapsed. Didn't mean to fall asleep but I'll never forget the rude awakening I got about 30 minutes later....wife still immobile was screaming as loud as she could, managed to crawl into the living room to find me, fkn cat was howling at me in what was probably the only useful act it's ever committed, baby boy was crying and covered in doo doo...she thought I had left them. I'm also a snorer, apparently I was so deeply asleep that I wasn't even snoring so after finding out I hadn't left...she thought I was dead. I warped back from the dead to all of this, I was already on my feet before my eyes were even open trying to figure out what was happening. My wife, crying on the floor, the fkn cat, doody duty, all of it. Took me about 5 minutes just to find an acceptable heart rate and put my wife back in bed.

The **** is funny now. When it happened I felt so bad about it, I decided to sleep even less lol... about a month or two later, I was wrecked from exhaustion AND THEN DECIDED TO PLAY BASKETBALL geezus take the wheel!! I heard that crunch, felt my whole leg give out and that was my new reality for months.

Long story short, sleep when you get the chance to sleep.

 

When they outgrow the baby stuff (bottles, bibs, etc.) get rid of it. Always try to de-clutter as they grow up or you'll end up with an attic full of baby crap you don't need anymore. Note: husbands are much better at this than wives.

Date night at least once a month. Overnight, if possible. Go be a couple again instead of just mommy and daddy.

Let the grandparents babysit whenever possible. And don't question their methods. They raised you, after all. They know what they're doing.

 

Baby Bjorns are the greatest thing ever created even though it makes you look like a tool. I've never experienced more pride than when I was running around with my kid in the baby bjorn. It also allows you to eat with both hands.

 

lol
When my kid was a week old I fell asleep in a chair at a friends Super Bowl party.
that kid would only sleep 45min at a time for the first 6 months - it was Hell. She still doesn't sleep much and she's 13.

But don't worry - that doesn't mean your next one will be the same. My next daughter slept 4 hours at a time beginning the first night. She used to put herself to bed as a toddler.

 

lol awe man the things new parents go through haha.

When our first daughter was barely standing, I walked in her room to find her awoke from her nap, standing, with her diaper off. She had pooped and decided to play with it. Poop smeared on the walls, poop on the crib, poop on the blanket, poop all over her hands and poop on her face. If I ever want to embarrass her, I bring up that story.

 

I think you earned some kind of Dad merit badge there

 

Earplugs.

Recently: Chromecast and TV in bedroom. They wake up at 3:30 am cast some cartoon in there. It turns the TV on and they never see you.

-Father of the year.

 

Know where babby come from.

 

Be ready to be tired all the time, sick most of the time, and lose any flexibility you had in life before kids. Safe and reliable child care is worth more than you’d ever realize, especially if both parents work.

 

Just be consistent.. It's a breeze after the initial wave of emotion..

 

Good stuff all around. Currently up at 2:45am with a 13 hour old newborn.

 

Congrats!

Best feeling in the world.

 

If your company allows relocation, consider moving to Asia where you can easily afford a domestic helper taking care of your kid(s).

 

Don't turn down help. Lots of people will offer to help, go ahead and take it.

 

hey congrats!!!

 

Best advice I can give a new dad: watch your nuts. From the time they start walking until age 5 or so, you will get hammered with unimaginable frequency. You pick them up and their little legs start to kick right when the feet reach sack level. You’re asleep and they jump into bed, landing on your balls. You come home from work and they run to do a slam hug on you with their little heads at just the right height and angle to make maximum nad contact. Every ball they throw towards your unsuspecting self will have the perfect arc and just the right amount of velocity to induce maximum pain. They crawl on you and leap on you and climb on you. It is one horror after another that always ends up with you in a fetal position clutching your equipment while your wife laughs at how cute the little bugger is. And it's all wonderful.

 

This would make a great video montage with each scenario ending with the dad curled up in a fetal position then on to the next scene where it is duplicated all over again.

 

The most important relationship in the family is the one between husband and wife. I see too many people who put their kids first. Big mistake.