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I finally get to have my kids...this coming Saturday.

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by ROXRAN, Sep 22, 2003.

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  1. ROXRAN

    ROXRAN Member

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    After more that a month, I will finally be able to have my children here in Houston for a little more than 2 weeks...I can't tell you how happy I am...

    Last Wednesday was the day of what is called the pedente-lite hearing (You lawyers know), or temporary hearing...

    This is an initial court hearing that is set to settle custody issues, personal possesions, and initial child support...As we sat there in the court in Murfressboro, Tennessee we were last on the docket and the wait seemed to last at least 2 hours, (I'm sure Harris county would have been worse, though) Both attorneys stood up as "Griffin vs. Griffin" was announced and they said they would confer for 45 min. to reach an agreement...This was on a weekday and I'm sure Roxana's thinking was this would hurt her job since she only has weekends off, and I'm more flexible on weekdays being off,...but that's just my thinking on her instructing her attorney to have this "agreement"...As it is, the temporary agreement is much in my favor since I am not now to pay support, will have custody on nearly a 50% basis for a month and the travel expenses will be equal...plus she has returned my firearms to me ... :) (which she lied and claimed I threatened her and her family with shooting them) In addition I spent the whole day with the girls at the zoo after court till 7 p.m.

    Now she has been calling, e-mailing me, telling me she will arrive on the 11th to pick them up and she wants to meet at a restaurant to "discuss" the girls custody and asks why I don't return her e-mails...this baffles me...I gave her every opportunity to play nice and talk civilized and now only after I have a lawyer is she being "nice", I don't get it...well i kinda do get it...It's sinking in she has a lot to lose with the girls and financially,...plus if we don't agree on custody regarding the holidays,...it's back to the court...ON A WEEKDAY...and I talked to my lawyer today the order in effect says the 14th (a weekday) when she picks them up...I'm sure her job surely does not enjoy her missing time, and right now...I don't care if I go to Murfreesboro 30 times before now and Christmas...

    Honestly, I really don't enjoy that her job could be in jeopordy and that she will deal with hardships...It's not my nature to glee, especially when things could turn around just as easily. But the most important thing is time with my two precious girls and what is best for them. I need them, but I also know they need me as well... Thanks.
     
    #1 ROXRAN, Sep 22, 2003
  2. Falcons Talon

    Falcons Talon Member

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    I'm glad to hear that it seems like you are getting a fair shake...like you said...Do whatever is best for your daughters.

    My prayers are with you and your daughters.
     
    #2 Falcons Talon, Sep 22, 2003
  3. eekamouse

    eekamouse Member

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    Roxran, that is great news. I too have been there and done that and it sounds like you have a good lawyer and are sticking up for yourself and your kids rights to have both parents in their lives!

    If you need a good resource for pre-post divorce strategy try this site...(if you havent already been there)

    http://www.deltabravo.net/custody/

    there is a multitude of documentation and great discussion boards. This site is focused for men and women who are non-custodial parents. The boards usually dont degenerate into mudslinging like a lot of others. Anyway knowledge is power.

    Best of luck and have a great time with the kiddos.
     
    #3 eekamouse, Sep 22, 2003
  4. Manny Ramirez

    Manny Ramirez The Music Man

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    That is great news, Randy!

    I know how much that meant to you, and realize that there are lots of people in your corner. Don't give in to anything with her!

    Let me know if I can help you in any way and I'll keep praying for you.
     
    #4 Manny Ramirez, Sep 22, 2003
  5. AroundTheWorld

    AroundTheWorld Member

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    Good luck to you, your kids, and also your wife.
     
    #5 AroundTheWorld, Sep 22, 2003
  6. red

    red Member

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    congrats...in honor of this glorious news im gonna go make some squirrel stew now.
     
    #6 red, Sep 22, 2003
  7. MoBalls

    MoBalls Member

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    Im happy for you and your kids....Great News!
     
    #7 MoBalls, Sep 22, 2003
  8. ROXRAN

    ROXRAN Member

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    Thanks everyone!,...To celebrate I invite everyone to my house for deep fried squirrel...:D

    btw, my youngest turns 3 this Sept. 30th...

    p.s. Do yall really think she wants to end it with me?...I am confused, she is calling me and ending her calls with "take care" and asking "how my Mom is doing", "how I like my new job" like I mean something and just tonight she talks to me for half an hour...It pisses me off because I sense something familiar regarding how we once felt, but I can't make sense of it...She has asked for this divorce, but she isn't acting like a victim of a bad relationship, I don't understand it... If she wants to end it, I wish she would treat me like a stranger, at least my heart could recover completely...
     
    #8 ROXRAN, Sep 23, 2003
  9. GreenVegan76

    GreenVegan76 Member

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    You sound like a really caring father. I hope you enjoy your time with your kids. If you keep putting them first, things will work out.

    Good luck, dude! :)
     
    #9 GreenVegan76, Sep 23, 2003
  10. MoBalls

    MoBalls Member

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    Maybe she is acting like this on the advice of her lawyer......just continue to be civil with her.....I hope all goes well....3 is an awesome age
     
    #10 MoBalls, Sep 23, 2003
  11. yaonotyo

    yaonotyo Member

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    dude i did not know you were going threw something similiar, congratulations man!
     
    #11 yaonotyo, Sep 23, 2003
  12. Faos

    Faos Member

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    In a semi-perfect world, you two could remain good friends and your kids would be better off for it, imo. How do you do that? I have no idea. Being a child of divorce, there is nothing worse than having to take sides.
     
    #12 Faos, Sep 23, 2003
  13. bamaslammer

    bamaslammer Member

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    Keep it civil with your wife at all costs. Think of your kids. Don't ever talk about your ex in anything other than glowing terms when around your children, because they listen.
     
    #13 bamaslammer, Sep 23, 2003
  14. giddyup

    giddyup Member

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    JUST ASK HER DIRECTLY.

    After we had separated, my wife and I had struck up a civil relationship. Once we got to talking about dating. This was back in the days of "Personals." I had placed an ad and told her about it.

    She looked at me and said, "Tell me how to write an ad to find a guy like you..."

    I looked back at her, "________, you've already proven you don't want a guy like me." I wasn't ugly about it. I was just matter of fact.. kind of chuckly, really.

    She didn't address the comeback.

    Later on, it haunted me. Was she reaching out? If so, why not be more direct and less vague? I never asked her about it again and, for the sake of our children together, I regret that.

    Less than a year later, we were divorced.

    NO TIME LIKE THE PRESENT.
     
    #14 giddyup, Sep 23, 2003
  15. Rashmon

    Rashmon Member

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    As a veteran of the domestic wars myself, the best advice I can give is this:

    If you and you're ex do not ever agree on anything else, make an agreement to never bad-mouth each other in front of the children.

    It is for their sake. You won't regret it. You're children will be better off for it.
     
    #15 Rashmon, Sep 23, 2003
  16. ROXRAN

    ROXRAN Member

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    I was trying to send a cute picture, but I couldn't...Thanks for the additional advice.
     
    #16 ROXRAN, Sep 23, 2003
    Last edited: Sep 23, 2003
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