On Tuesday, I set a tape to record the live soccer match between Manchester United and Deportivo. Both teams were quarterfinalists in last year's European Champions League tournament. Big game, great teams. The final third of the game isn't on the tape. Why? Because ESPN2 cut away to feature ESPN's coverage of Michael Jordan's return to basketball. "We welcome those of you watching on ESPN2 and ESPN Classic ..." Then, 45 minutes of David Aldridge and some blow-dried idiot chatting about MJ. No MJ press conference. No more soccer. Just Aldridge and the blow-dried anchor. Thank goodness! Rather than continue to air the live game they had promised on their TV schedule, those quick-thinking ESPN executives broke in with the earth-shattering, shocking news that Jordan is coming back. Since I'd been on another planet these past few weeks, I had no idea His Airness was returning! In fact, this news was so important that I would have been furious if ESPN had simply broken in for 30 seconds, told me Jordan's comeback was official, and returned to the game. No, I desperately needed those 45 minutes of Aldridge's insights. Why actually watch sports when you can watch other people talk about sports? I know, you're thinking, "If they wanted to show 45 minutes of Aldridge, why not just show it on one ESPN channel and let the other two ESPN channels go on showing their scheduled programming? Why road-block all three channels with Aldridge?" If you're asking that question, obviously, you'll never make it as an ESPN executive. This experience has so moved me that I'm going to write a letter to ESPN pleading with them to get rid of all their boring soccer coverage and replace it with a sport that is obviously far more exciting and important: watching David Aldridge talk. Rant over.
You can't talk about loving ESPN and not mention the priviledge of getting to watch all the World's Strongest Man shows. I wait up until 2 and 3 AM just so I can see which of these life-span shortened brain surgeons have taken more steroids <b>this</b> time. The last show, I wanted the big muscular guy to win over the slightly less smaller, slightly less muscular guy. When he didn't, I cried.
You know what I like? Is when I fall asleep with ESPN on TV and I listen to SportsCenter 5 or 6 times in my sleep. Then I wonder why I can't remember what I need to do at work but I can remember that Barry Bonds is hitting a homerun every 8 at bats and that Randy Johnson only needs 17 more strike outs to tie Nolan Ryan's single season mark set in 1973 and he has almost 80 less innings pitched. DaaNaaNaa - DaaNaaNaa
Eeeewww, you watch soccer! God forbid ESPN show a tape delay of the press conference, wouldn't want people to miss a live feed of Jordan returning even though we've all known he would be coming back for the better part of 4 or 5 months.
Raven Lunatic, I like those shows. Magnuss ver Magnusson is a great athlete. He was shorter and smaller than the larger competitors but was able to do all the events well enough to win 3 or 4 of the World's Strongest Man competitions. What do you like, I'd like the opportunity to complain about it too.
What about their recent suggestions at Albert Pujols being a possible MVP candidate. Of course, they know, as everyone else does, that Barry Bonds will win it, but putting Pujols up there with the likes of Bonds, Sosa and GOnzales is ridiculous. And even if it isnt ridiculous, we happen to have a player down here with nearly every stat BETTER than Pujols (especially if you do it per AB), in Lance Berkman, but of course he will get no love. ESPN sucks.
I'm not sure you can get as big as some of those guys naturally. And I'm not quite sure if getting that pumped up, then carrying huge boulders around is that big a draw. Sorry, but it's more of a novelty to watch. But hey, if it's all just the product of hard work then more power to them. I guess there's got to be some way to show it off.
I've always been really annoyed by those strongman competitions, too. Something about the low budget filming makes it look like the events were all set in the early 80's...and the mullets don't help either... I'd rather watch 80's b-ball anyday... no whistles, no commercials, scores of 145-138... different bad haircuts, but still a better draw...
If it had been an Australian Rules Football game instead of a soccer game, I would have been really upset if I was you. Those ARF games were the best..they may still show them on one of the ESPN networks but I have no idea. I always liked the officials of those games in their neat little white suits and fedoras (or some hat like that). I'll tell you what or who I hate/can't stand about ESPN: Linda Cohn -- she has to be the most annoying and condescending person that I have ever heard in my life. My father always thought that the only reason she has been on there this long is because she is the President of ESPN's wife. Also, I love how they make you think on Sportscenter or Baseball Tonight that they are fixing to show certain highlights and then they wait 30 minutes later just to force you to watch the entire damn show!
You have to admit that ESPN has some damn good commercials. Almost better than their actual programming...
Y'all sure are harsh on the biggest and best sports network out there. And yes, the commercials are classic.
I was watching a Aussie Rules game on ESPN about 15 years ago, when some guy got the CRAP kicked out of his head. He was basicaly writhing around on the field in an ever-growing pool of blood as the 'team doctor' ran out on the field. I assumed that the ambulance wouldn't be far behind. WRONG! The doctor opened his bag, wiped up his blood, and then (I swear!) stitched him right up on the field!. The guy got up, wobbled around, and then continued playing! I will never insult Aussie Football ever again in my life, becuse one of those tough bastards might be out there, take offence, and come to kick my @ss!
