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JVG on Match.com

Discussion in 'Houston Rockets: Game Action & Roster Moves' started by Amel, May 7, 2007.

  1. Amel

    Amel Member

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    some of you guys already seen it, its pretty funny IMO



    JVGthonglvr64


    I am: A legend

    Seeking: Anything

    Interested in: Lover, battleship parter, taking it to the limit

    Location: The danger zone

    Occupation: Honda civic pace car driver/ NBA Offense Killer

    Ethnicity: Pale

    Religion: Slowness

    Star Sign: I dont believe in that ****

    Relationship Status: Married, but looking - was seeing Matt Bullard

    Have Children: Talk to my lawyers

    Want Children: Get ****ed

    My Goods:
    Height: 48"

    Weight: slightly heavier than mist

    Hair: not existent, frizzy combover, ring shaped

    Eyes: bloodshot , creepy racoon

    My Habits:
    Cigarettes: Only when I'm logged on or watching the Survivor finale

    Booze: Only on Spring Break

    Drugs: Religiously

    Self Love: Playoff pending

    Your Goods:
    Height: 6'2

    Weight: Thick

    Hair: Extended

    Eye color: Mystical

    Your Habits:
    Cigarettes: Never

    Booze: You know it..

    Drugs: If it helps you to keep up with me - knock yourself out

    Self love: Don't even think about it

    Other:
    Last great book I read: Instructions to my new Casio

    Most humbling moment: Showers with Mutombo

    Favorite on-screen sex scene: Anything with Paul Giamatti

    Celebrity I resemble most: Paul Bearer of the WWE but I've been told I look like a smaller version of Vince Vaughn

    Song or album that puts me in the mood: "Maneater", anything by Gwar

    5 items I can't live without:
    -Diet Coke
    -Mascara (eye shadow)
    -Mold of Alonzo Mourning's leg
    -Honda Civics (models, actual cars, paintings, sketches, pictures)
    -Jock Jams 7

    If I could be anywhere right now:
    Getting freaky on Ibiza or in the Big Brother household
     
  2. Nice Rollin

    Nice Rollin Member

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    showers with mutombo...wow

    IBTL
     
  3. TTRocket

    TTRocket Member

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    I just called the TBS humor hotline. They said this thread was "mildly amusing". *Snicker*
     
  4. Amel

    Amel Member

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  5. Drewdog

    Drewdog Member

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    Holy **** that was hilarious! :D

    Great find!
     

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