If you;ve been married for 20 yrs Ups and downs but basically a good solid marriage you found out your spouse cheated on you the second year of ya marriage. they say it was the only time and it was a one night stand Do you stay or Walk? Please Indicate if you are Female or male I suspect Women will stay more than men. I know i would probably walk Rocket River
While I wouldn't be happy, I can't imagine ending my marriage solely over something that happened 18 years ago. (I'm a male, by the way).
hhhmmmm interesting Question: At what point would you take this stance? I mean . . .if it happened a year ago? 2? 5? Rocket River
probably walking but depends on the nature of what the marriage really was at the time as far as understanding.. my understanding of what I would want marriage to be tells me I would walk.. male here
SO? You folx who stay . . .. . you would beleive that it was the only time? Rocket River This is facsinating.
seriously... i would want to leave, but the fact that it happened so long ago and we had spent 20 (happy) years together after the fact is what would make me stay. ignorance is bliss.
I'd probably try to stay, but would never really be able to trust her again. I'd probably analyze the past and think of all of the times that she could have cheated on me and wonder if she might have done it then also. I'd try to believe her when she said it was just a one night stand, but you said "you found out she cheated on you" which is a big difference from "she told you about it 18 years afterwards because of the guilt she felt". Since I'd be in my 40's-50's, I'd want to try to save the marriage, but in the end, the lack of trust would cause the marriage to be a hell that would end in divorce... Male by the way...
MasterCard Wedding This is a true story about a recent wedding that took place at Clemson University. It was in the local newspaper and even Jay Leno mentioned it. It was a huge wedding with about 300 guests. After the wedding, at the reception, the groom got up on stage with a microphone to talk to the crowd. He said he wanted to thank everyone for coming, many from long distances, to support them at their wedding. He especially wanted to thank the bride's and his family and to thank his new father-in-law for providing such a lavish reception. As a token of his deep appreciation he said he wanted to give everyone a special gift just from him. So taped to the bottom of everyone's chair, including the wedding party, was a manila envelope. He said this was his gift to everyone, and asked them to open their envelope. Inside each manila envelope was an 8x10 glossy of his bride having sex with the best man. The groom had gotten suspicious of them weeks earlier and had hired a private detective to tail them. After just standing there, just watching the guests' reactions for a couple of minutes, he turned to the best man and said, "F--- you!" then turned to his bride and said, "F--- you!" Then he turned to the dumbfounded crowd and said, "I'm outta here." He had the marriage annulled first thing in the morning. While most people would have cancelled the wedding immediately after finding out about the affair, this guy goes through with the charade, as if nothing were wrong. His revenge... making the bride's parents pay over $32,000 for a 300 guest wedding and reception, and best of all, trashing the bride's and best man's reputations in front of 300 friends and family members. This guy has balls the size of church bells. Do you think we might get a MasterCard "priceless" commercial outta this? Elegant wedding reception for 300 family members and friends.....$32,000 Wedding photographs commemorating the occasion......$3,000 Deluxe two week honeymoon accommodations in Maui.....$8,500 The look on everyone's face when they see the 8x10 glossy of the bride humping the best man... Priceless! There are somethings money can't buy. For everything else there's MASTERCARD!!!
That was an urban legand, Bob, with lots of variations. I've heard about it for years. http://www.snopes.com/weddings/embarras/bothered.htm
Yea i heard about that, my U.S. history teacher told us about that, he was reading his e-mail one day during class and told read it to us, it was so damn hilarious
Leave. I wouldn't want to, but I wouldn't be able to trust her either, so it wouldn't make sense to stay.
I'd stay... ... and arrange for her to walk in on me cheating on her with the hottest, youngest, biggest-boobed college chick I could find. -Single male
It is totally Hypothetical to me I find this intiguing - because the it seems to show that if you hold a lie long enough . .the truth doesn't matter Jeff. If you found out immediately you'd be gone.. .or at least more bothered than finding out later Would the impact be as strong a year later? 5 years later? So basically all the stuff about YOU SHOULD BE HONEST AND FESS UP .. . is BS It seems like if you make that type of mistake tuck it under the rug. . . . and wait. . . even if it comes out much later. . .it won't be as bad if you do it within short time after It jsut seems that if you wait long enough . . lie long enough omit the truth long enough . . .. . .then it *does* have a benefit. Rocket River FOR THE RECORD . .. I AM NOT MARRIED . .. I DID NOT CHEAT!!
Assuming that I've been able to deduct that it really was only one time, I'd have to determine why she slept with someone else. Especially in year two of a marriage. Things should still be hot between husband and wife. Maybe the fact of never sleeping with another person besides the husband freaked her out and she wanted to try it and be sure that married life is really what she wants. Although she should've been sure of this before hand. If this is the case, and it's obviously out of her system, then it'd be hard, but I'd try to cope with it. Husband should have right to act like a brat for as long as he wants after the fact. Maybe she thinks her husband is hung like a mouse and needed to be with a real man. Or, the guy she slept with is a past love that she wanted to make sure she wasn't still in love with him. Basically, if she slept with another man for feelings, I'd stay. If she slept with another man for pure sex, then f*ck her, she's out the door.
