OF course not, I'm a business woman and I don't need a illegitimate kid. YET. Nope, not yet...I've decided to wait a bit and see what happens. Go with the flow. Well, that's if he ever comes back from Mexico.
Well, I think he needs to get her gay best friend to get on his side...girls count on their gay best friends more than they do with their mothers.
I prefer the path of most resistance. You always want the gay friend on your side. If he signs off on you.... your golden!!!
*sigh* How in the world iis my relationship advice incorrect? You and owl-boy can say whatever you like, but aren't you single now, Jeffrrey? I'm thinking it might be time to heed advice.
I gotta stop the long winded responses. I apologize for the long reads everyone. If its trying too hard to be that player type "hit it and quit it" guy, I can agree. Over glamourized role. (I'm assuming its the older guy chasing around YOUNGER girls example) Disagreeing on the part of 40 year olds hitting it on a regular basis being automatically sad though. If he can, why not? Not just the exceptions who can do it without looking like a doofus but any guy. What is the "appropriate" way for a guy in his 40's then? Marriage isnt the option it used to be for men or women. In my opinion a man who doesnt choose marriage and exclusivity can do any person who's of age that wants to do him. And there doesnt necessarily have to be a cap on that. (Just my opinion, not attacking yours and I respect it)
Well you did say - But "signs" dont mean you actually are and we're hoping you're not (no we didnt take the comment that seriously) now I gotta talk all long again... (In my "expert" opinion) - we're in a FREE land where ANYBODY is free to choose what they want to do, the way they want it done. More and more people are realizing that and taking advantage of their freedoms to choose. Which will mean people arent gonna go with the expected way (the "old fashioned" way), or are going to "settle" as much. Naturally its just gonna take longer for people to feel each other out Hopefully its not just men being "r****ds" cuz both men and women value their freedoms and dont just want to give that up and jump into something (exclusivity is almost an antonym to "freedom"). No reason to get discouraged, thats just how it is. MEN DO get more serious about committed relationships later on, but I feel women late 20's and under dont really want those men. They would rather with their heightened sense of entitlment squeeze the more desirable younger guys (who can attract other women and are more naturally unsettled) into commitments with shaming techniques. Wouldnt it make sense to get a guy who comes into it ALREADY wanting an exclusive relationship? (NO it doesnt, because they're neeerrrrrrrds admit it ) Forget that article. Honestly I say screw the whole "you gotta "READ me right/Its more special when you figure it out without me saying it" mind game BULLSHI- mentality girls pull. Time is of the essence and if you dont like the dating game dont play games - straight verbally let the guy know the relationship type you need. He's sure to appreciate your honesty. And you'll both be better for it.
Fatty. Who are you to give advice on long-term relationships and marriages? You don't keep relationships for more than 5 seconds and we all know that it's obviously because of your charming personality.
18 it is for me then, I should have married 3 years ago edit: I love this thread by the way. I check it... erm... every few hours or so..
I'm not married, but I am in an "exclusive" relationship, to use the vernacular of this thread. Thanks for your concern, but I'm doing quite well in that area. But, this isn't about your dubious advice about dating or whatever you call it. My comment was in direct response to your moronic suggestion that, after 3 years, I still be bitter and feel contempt towards my ex because she managed to re-marry. However, my commentary on your advice in that regard notwithstanding, I would encourage anyone on here to extend those words to cover pretty much everything else you post on this BBS as well, particularly your wisdom in the world of dating.
My bad. To be fair, I do actually have quite a bit of good advice with relationships. However, none of it seems to comes out correctly at 2:00 in the morning. In my opinion, someone who jumps from relationship to relationship has insecurity issues. I've seen it far to often to be incorrect. If I wanted, I could be in a relationship tomorrow. The fact is, I haven't found that girl that gives me pangs. Until I do, I'm willing to wait.
Agreed. In this case, my ex has had two relationships in the past 15 years, so it isn't like she is jumping from relationship to relationship. She was lucky enough to find someone that is very well-suited to her and vice versa. He's a good guy and I'm happy for both of them.
I must say that both FFB and Jeff give excellent advice. As someone in my mid 20's I can appreciate Grandpa Fattys additude. "Listen to me, I got no reason to lie to you, don't make the same mistakes I made when I was young. f*ck a lotta women kid, not just one woman, a lotta women." Especially now when my peers (male/female) are starting to get into that "I don't wanna end up alone" phase. So they end up shacking up with someone who'll do as opposed to someone who's right. Problem is though that at it's most extreme FFB's advice will turn you into Scott Baio: 45 and single. Thus Jeff makes a valid point regarding relationships and dating. Life's to short to stay bitter at an ex and whoring around gets a tad old. But I must say that in todays dating market there's little demand for the Lloyd Dobler types. Actually, even the nice girls don't want a Lloyd Dobler type. So what have I learned. Well when a friend comes in from out of town this friday I'll employ the FFB advice. Bang her that night and Saturday, take her to Dharma Cafe for brunch on Sunday (my treat), pat her on the head and send her on her way. With the ultra hot and cool hippster DJ chick I'll use the long, slightly modified Lloyd Dobler courtship that Jeff might suggest. Thank you very much grumpy old men.
I think there are a couple points to be made about this. First, it isn't about nice guys vs. bad boys. It's about confidence. You can be the biggest nerd on the block, but if you have confidence in yourself, you'll be fine. Second, it is extremely important to determine what you want in a woman. If you want to get laid and little else, your chances are better if you go to a club, look the part and act cocky. If you want a RELATIONSHIP, you need to meet someone who you can get along with and whose company you enjoy. To do that requires honesty and confidence in who you are as a person, not confidence in your ability to get laid, which quite frankly, isn't all that difficult. It's about getting along with the other person and finding something in them that is beyond looks and surface personality. Granted, it's not easy, but it is a lot easier if you spend less time pretending and more time being confident in yourself.
