I think it should be noted that my ex wife and I were in a relationship for 13 years (9 of them married). We were as close as friends as anything. For both of us, removing that friendship would've been like losing a member of the family.
Dude are you serious? Only six in a three year span? Your not counting random hook-ups are you? Please tell me your not. My ex dumped me last novemeber and I've dated just as many since. Not including random hook-ups.
First off, "dude," I'm nearly 40 years old and not interested in "random hook ups." I had my fill of those when I was an idiot 20-year-old musician with nothing better to do than go out to bars and be stupid. It got boring, fast. Second, I have ZERO interest in serial dating. Did it. Got over it. Moved on. It's no wonder you have such fixed ideas on dating. How old are you anyway?
I agree with you. I am starting to limit myself to girls I'm REALLY interested in, rather than dating any girl I think I have a chance to just bone. That limits the number of girls I date dramatically.
For me, it's a question of do I really WANT to date someone. I CAN date plenty of women, but the reality is, I don't WANT to because it is a waste of my time. Quality is more important than quantity and, frankly, I'd rather spend time with a few people that I really like than a bunch of people I barely know.
so... between the two... who was the first to show signs of dissatisfaction.. who gave the first hints of desiring seperation..?
In the case of my ex and I, neither of us really wanted to separate, but it was becoming obvious. We were both growing weary and we started to realize there were elements of our relationship that just didn't and weren't going to ever work. Ultimately, I was the one that made the decision, but it was predicated by a number of things she and I both did. In the end, it was the right decision for both of us. Admittedly, our situation was unique.
Well, there you go. Trust me, nothing is more sad than a dude pushing 40 still trying to hit it and quit it on a regular basis...even if he can.
In my case, she did, and she cut off contact completely. Now after running into each other a year later at a club, she wants to hang out again, not sure if it's a good idea for me.
Dude, that is true. There is a 40 yr old I know who does that. He even got a fake id that says he's 28.
Oh, lord. That isn't to say having fun isn't on the agenda. I just don't want that to be my primary goal. God, if I were still doing that at 40+...scary.
Haven't read through yet, and I don't care to. A "relationship" starts when you swallow. I know that's not what you want to hear, but at least it isn't "anal." Seriously, I've been through dozens of relationships, and if the girl sucks physically, she's out. And apparently I'm typically out anywhere from 6 months-3 years for my abrasiveness. Back to your question: I don't care how much you want to say you "like" the guy or even "love" him, make him say it first. It is almost tantamount to a good relationship. Other than that, Godspeed.
Ok, I'm reading through this thread now. How are you not a "clinger?" Because you waited two months? As Family Fued would say: X
I think she's afraid of looking like a clinger. But I'm not sure if anything she has said proves she's a clinger.
Jesus, she's already remarried? Talk about a clinger. And I don't care how much friends you were, that should piss you off. No offense, but what the hell? EDIT: I just talked to three girls here. You should damn well be pissed off. Unless you don't care about her at all anymore.
And I'm sure I would be the "bad" uncle. Point is Lady di, you sound like a clinger, in my opinion. But I'll let that part slide and tell you Paul Harvey's "rest of the story." Men like a chase, period. At least the ones who are worth it. If you succumb as soon as he does, you are in what we call a "Clinger coup de gras" Otherwise, make yourself a challenge. I know it is tempting to do the crap they do in the movies, but if you don't see the sign, it is highly discouraged, at least IMO.
"No offense?" Wrong. Plenty of offense. You don't know them. And, going on your posts here, you're really in no position to judge. So just don't. "No offense," but you give a hell of a lot of relationship advice for somebody that seems to have never had a successful relationship.
