For those of us with kids, what are some good clean jokes? Did you hear about the blind skunk?....It got married to a FART. What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer? Why wouldn't the baby lobster share his toys? Because he was shellfish. Knock knock Who's there? Dwain! Dwain who? Dwain the tub I'm dwounding Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting cow Interrupting c... MOO!! what do ya call a cow w/ no legs??? ground beef How do you make a band stand? Take away their chairs. Why did God only make 1 yogi bear? Because he made a boo boo.
why did the hipster burn himself when drinking hot chocolate........because he drank it before it was cool.
How do you catch a unique rabbit? Spoiler unique up on it (you sneak up on it) Stole this one from Crazy Dave
Why did the elephants get kicked out of the public pool? Spoiler They kept dropping their trunks! Spoiler It's clean cause their elephants right?
Why are there no casinos in the jungle? There are too many cheetahs (5th grade student told me this one...) How does Lady GaGa like her meat? Raww Raww Rawww Raww Rawww (Have to sing it) How do you wake Lady GaGa up? (Poke er' face) -6th Grader
Why can't a bicycle stand up by itself? Spoiler Because it's two-tired!! ............ ............ ............
A man from Poland goes to the optometrist who shows the Pole a card with the letters, C Z W X N Q S T A C Z. "Can you read this?" the optometrist asks. "Read it?" the Pole replies, "I know the guy!"
My wife told me to take out the garbage. I told her "you cooked it, you take it out". - Rodney Dangerfield
By Attorney: This Myasthenia Gavis, does it affect your memory at all? By Witness: Yes. Attorney: And in what ways does it affect your memory? Witness: I forget things. Attorney: You forget things? Can you give us an example of something you've forgotten?
