You find a little-used crawl space in Lakewood Church... err the Compaq Center. Naturally, you crawl in. Bam!!! You've entered and control the mind of “STEVIE FRANCHISE.” You get so excited that you jump in the air and bash your head against the ceiling. 43" vert. Damn. You peek inside your gym shorts. Macbethian. You’re making gains everywhere. Even better, it is Super Bowl week in H-town. You are the “Special Invited Guest” at every party in town. You try to express your elation, but all you can think of saying is “That’s What I’m Talkin’ Bout” in a deep voice, over and over. Your dogs turn and look at you funny. You shut up. It’s real quiet in this head. You realize you’re standing alone in your mansion. Pimped out. Leather. Fur. Shag. Velvet. Can’t. Think. In. Complete. Sentences. Doorbell. Ding. Dong. Open. Door. 12 Playboy Bunnies. Standing. Giggling. Every Month. January - December. The whole calendar. Scantily clad. Staying with you. All week. It’s only Monday. Fast foward to Sunday afternoon. Super Bowl Sunday. Your cell phone goes off with a Barry White ringtone. Caller ID says “Lil' Baldy.” You pick up. It’s JVG. ___________________________________________________ “Steve, where are you?” “Uhh...” “We’re boarding the plane. Where are you?” “Perso...” “What?? Steve are you at the Super Bowl?” “Personal...” “Steve I hear the crowd cheering in the background.” “Personal, urgent matter...” “Steve, don’t bother coming to Phoenix. You’re suspended.” “I vehemently disagree, coach.” Click. ___________________________________________________ Everyone stop being so righteous. If you were Steve Francis, what would it take for you to tell JVG to shove it. Vote and/or come up with your own “reason.” All I got to say is: Everybody’s got a price.
Steve Francis. Steve. Franchise. Yeah. That's What I'm Talkin' About. Steve. Franchise. S. T. E. V. E. * F. R. A. N....F. R. A. N.... sumpin' sumpin. Yeah. That's What I'm Talkin' About. Franchiiiiiize. Yeah yeah. Hum. gottogetminegottogetminegottogetminegottogetmine
I can't stand beyonce, she tries too hard and comes off as unsexy. that pepsi commercial with her britney and enrique in gladiator wear was one of the worse things I have ever seen, and this is someone who has been there for OJ, the war on terror, 911, michael Jackson, milli vanilli and multiple rockets losses to horrible teams.
It looks like Steve Francis had a whole lot on his mind leading up to the Superbowl. When Stevie thinks too much, it usually results in a turnover.
Hey now, this thread is meant to lighten the situation, but let's not go too far. Some of us get tongue-tied and awkward just typing her name on a Rockets' fan BBS.
JVG: Where's your brain? Steve: Why'd you kick me? JVG: Where's your brain? Steve: Why'd you kick me? JVG: Where's your brain? Steve: I asked you first.
I suspect, on some deeply subconcious level, that this all has something to do with the HUGE story on Cat in Saturday's paper. I don't know why, but I think SF's frustration this season, as well as Cat's rise in popularity and along with Yao, is making SF feel unappreciated. Or it's Beyonce.
See how good Steve is when a Clutchfans member controls him during the game? Just like NBA Live, even the halftime 3 pt fadeaways go glass and in... But seriously - You see what some of that good Beyonce lovin' will do for you? Your jump shot suddenly gets real, real accurate afterwards. [groan] Take it back nyquil, take it back.
Rockets v Knicks, Madison Square Garden, January 8th, 2004. Kim Cattrall: "So when I met Cuttino, he said 'Hey, just like my nickname - Cat,' and I decided that's a great reason to have sex with him. Plus these seats..." Beyonce: "Mmm... The Franchise in more ways than one. Wonder what he's doing after the Super Bowl." See, Cat and Steve do everything together.
MY GOD!!! she is gorgeous! nyquil, how can you say that? fine bod, fine looks, sweet voice... I dont like her style of music...but DAMN! she is F.I.N.E....
Sorry, I'm not technically proficient... the image seems to change back and forth. Here's a link to the site: http://www.beyonceworld.net/main.htm Under "Pictures" and "Rockets v Knicks", Cuttino's "friend" Kim Cattrall and Beyonce are courtside at the game.
After seeing that pic of Beyonce, I would almost excuse Steve if that were the reason. (It was my vote.) Steve: So you like my new Escalade? Now let's go back to my place... Beyonce: Stevie! No you didn't! You did not just ask me back to your crib! This is like a bad Cedric the Entertainer commercials, anyway! Steve: Then what choo smilin' for, then? Don't give me none of that Jay-Z stuff, now. That's good for the papers, yeah. But I'm the Franchise. You know how it is. Beyonce: Don'choo got a game tomorrow night? Steve: It's a'ight, I'll catch a plane later. Beyonce: You better call your coach, I don't want you to get into trouble. Steve: (sighs, dials phone) Coach? Hey, coach! Can you hear me now? Yeah, (winks at Beyonce) I can't make the plane, something just came up. Beyonce: Steve you are bad! Steve: Hush! What's that, coach? Yeah, I'm in traff---No, I---well, OK, yeah, I'm over at the Super Bowl---but coach, I----listen, I can catch a later flight, how many times is the Super Bowl in town? WHAT! Oh f*** you, you ain't suspendin me! Do you know who I am? I'm Mo Greene! I mean, I'm Stevie Wonder. The Franchise. You can't do this, we're trying to make the playoffs! THAT'S SOME BULLS***, WHY YOU SWEATIN ME! WHY YOU GOTTA BE LIKE----Hello? Hello?.......Is this a fake hangup?....Hello? Beyonce: Steve, did you just get in trouble? Steve: Man, Rudy wouldna done this! Go***** m*****f***ing Jeff Van c***s***ing Gumby a**hole sonofa*****....! Beyonce: Uh, how does this door open? I gotta go, How does this door open?!?!
