What do you do when someone approaches you on the street and asks you for change? I know that this may not happen that often in Houston since people drive everywhere. I never give them change because I don't think that this helps them. It just encourages more begging and discourages more contructive ways of earning money. Probably most would agree. So my real question is how do you say no? I have been just ignoring them but I am wondering if this is considered rude. Is it better just to say no?
I was with a couple of buddies once, and this guy came up, who we knew was going to ask for money. (the cup full of change gave him away). Before he got to us my friend asks, hey can you spare some change. They guy says sure, and pours the contents of his cup into my freinds outstretched hand. just something to think about But to answer the question, I try to give what I can, one or 2 bucks. I know some homeless people are actually trying to get out, and I feel its better to take a chance on them.
....define "good deed". Does enabling a person to live in my neighborhood, homeless in a park constitute a good deed? Does giving a junkie the money he needs to buy a crack rock constitute a "good deed"?
If you give with good intentions, then I believe it is right to give to homeless, however, nobody should ever make you feel guilty about not giving if you choose not to. You worked for that money, its yours, and nobody has the right to guilt you into giving it to someone. Also, what really gets me is these guys on the street corner that are a scam. They go out on street corners and are dropped off by a guy in a van, then at night, the dude in the van picks them up and skims off the top. I remember the 20/20 where the guy was a pan-handler in New York living in a penthouse apartment because he and his co-horts set up a scam like that. I think if you really feel strongly about helping homeless you should volunteer your money and time to organizations that help. Go work at a soup kitchen, or volunteer to teach at YMCA adult education classes. Help people help themselves whenever possible...that way you'll cut down on making scammers money and help out with people that really need it.
no, you big softie, you started it with all your talk of "good deeds"! btw, don't give out any money to those bastards working the corners of any Allen Parkway intersection. They are an organized bunch who are brought to the area by a guy in a white Cadillac. I exercise there during the week, and I watch them operate. They actually work the corners in shifts! I have to live in this neighborhood and deal with the trash that they leave behind. I think I will sic Wayne Dolcefino on them.
I said, "What do you want from us monster?" and the monster bent down and said, "I need about tree fiddy." I say I ain't giving you no tree fiddy you goddamned Loch Ness monster, get yo own goddamned money! I gave him a dollar.
I'll just answer your question and avoid getting into non-topical discussion. 1) You could continue ignoring. This will lead to no conflict for that is what most people do. 2) You could say "I'm sorry I cannot/will not spare change at this time" or something to that effect. This will lead to either no conflict, a polite response, or irritated response by the begger. 3) You could say something rude, but then that wouldn't make sense cause you posted this thread trying to find the polite social norm for this scenario. It's really up to you how you want to say no. There's no rules about it or anything.
I always say the same thing: sorry buddy, all I've got is a credit card... 1) it's a pretty CHICKENSHlT thing for me to say, and 2) it thoroughly pisses my wife off Still....I just can't help it......it blurts from my mouth. I have no control over it.
I used to give out change, but I've been burned a few times...so I definitely don't do it as frequently as I used to. Every time I see someone begging for money, I want to help them out, but I can't stop thinking of the bad incidents where people are full of ****. I remember one guy came up to me at a gas station saying, "Man, I've got a pregnant wife in the car and we need money for gas, please help me out." So I gave the guy 2 bucks, he then took those 2 bucks, and drove away without spending any of it on gas. Ever since then, I don't help out beggers. I know that some people really would appreciate the money and won't waste it on something stupid, but I just have difficulty changing my mindset... As far as your question, I look at them and tell them no. I think it's much worse to pretend that they're not even there, and most people appreciate it when you acknowledge them, even if you don't give them what they want...
whenever someone holds the door open to a bank, then asks for a donation is what annoys me. first of all, I have an ATM card that will allow me entrance into the bank on my own. you are making this bank an unsafe environment. SECOND OF ALL..... sorry, this ATM doesn't give loose change....