No, the issue is that rejection is scary and until you go through it and realize life is fine on the other side it's hard to overcome. I can tell you until I'm blue in the face that most girls are not going to be hateful and embarrass you if you hit on them even if they are out of your league, but that fear of embarrassing rejection is still something you have to get over on your own. The best way to get over it is to go through and move on.
This is more accurate... Girls/women have the same problem... yet no one talks about how they have trouble seeing boys/men as people because that's simply not the root of the problem... For such intensely social creatures who aspire for meaning, be it personal or otherwise.... The fear of personal failure and rejection go hand-in-hand with the fear of being alone and/or unrecognized.... rendered unimportant... which of course stems for the more basic fear of pain... In this case, emotional pain of any extent...
So i can be humiliated even further? No thanks. I appreciate some of the advice in here though, some are really good ones. I just need to man up.
I think he's in his early 20s. I remember a few threads about school and jobs where he said he was in an engineering program and got some credits in the Phillipines. I also remember a thread 4-5 years ago or so when he asked about doing the nasty raw and thinking he got his girl preggers. That was before the name change. I like this guy because his threads are full of lulz and sadness. They get really good when SacTown gets involved, too.
Cool story bro! <iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/qfI0WmqjowA" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
So you met her at church right, and see her once a week? If it's for some type of bible study, mention that you've had a couple verses on your mind and you'd like to share and discuss them. Song of Solomon 8:6-7 "Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame. Many waters cannot quench love; rivers cannot wash it away. If one were to give all the wealth of his house for love, it would be utterly scorned." If that passage sincerely means anything to you, bring it up and discuss it. Couldn't hurt. And if you're knowledgeable, your thoughts will likely be pretty impressive. She'd be yours before benediction, lol. But, you'd of course have to, you know... talk to her. This isn't something that I'd ever do, but if you're really religious maybe you'd be more comfortable starting things off in an arena that you're familiar with. Just a thought.
Alright, this is part of your problem. If you do not think highly of yourself, she will not think highly of you as a mate either. It is all very simple, women have a primal urge to have a man that is confident and well put together. It is good that you think she is beautiful, and you want her to feel beautiful but this "she deserved better" crap needs to stop. You didn't do anything wrong to her. Do your best to talk to her, even if it is just texting. You are over thinking it all but that is to be expected, you are very shy. When the time is right, you will come out of your shell.
What it really comes down to experience and becoming a man... you cannot make someone be confident or take chances, they figure it out on their own. People also mature at different rates..... OP is just a shy, inexperienced guy that does not have confidence. Only advice I can give is to listen to people..... you can improve yourself a lot by not being dismissive of flaws that others find in you.
Nook is right. If you don't have the proverbial balls to talk to the girl then how is she going to give you a shot? Hell, that's why douchebags seemingly always end up with the girl: because their doucheyness is perceived to be a form of confidence.
In another thread he talked about how he went to a Catholic school / camp / something for 17 years. So using that I figured he was at least 25.
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