So I pretended to be someone else...

I don't know but you should get off my dick

 

You're saying you want me to relent?

 

I once got a text that said something along the lines of - You can have me any way you want if my son gets the job. $30/hr. I responded with, "send me a preview of what I'll be getting."

She said she had no cell phone camera. I didn't respond. Then she called. And probably got my personalized voicemail greeting...