Another way I softened the financial blow, knowing the history and marketing of diamonds, was to think of it as a family heirloom- something I can give to a grandkid one day when they feel the time is right for them to propose. Hopefully by that time there be a little more flexibility in what is considered an ideal "token" of commitment. There are lots of cool things to make a ring out of. If I were going for sheer size, I'd make a ring out of GanjaRocket's mom. Ok, I'll admit- getting juvenile can be fun and cathartic!
First I apologize for making it personal. I am well aware of the history of diamonds and in a vaccum they would not be valued to the extent they are. I assume that most people are aware of the history of diamonds and their historical value. Concerning the point of materialism. I personally have less of an issue with someone buying a diamond engagement ring, than someone that mortgages themselves and participates in disposable consumerism. I have little issues with people purchasing things they will have long term, although I agree it is still consumerism. Did my wife want a diamond ring? Yes she did, I knew she did (although she expected a very modest ring), but I made the decision to get a bigger one. Do other people notice it? Yes they do..... and as sad as it is, she is treated differently with her ring, and a nice car. It makes her life easier. If you ex fiancee was receptive to being educated on diamonds then that is to her credit. However, I know that many women would be upset if their husband attempted to talk her out of it by saying they are not worth what they cost. It takes something away from the experience. Not being able to afford one is different, or not wanting one. However, it is not a purchase made for investment purposes. Am I old fashioned? Perhaps...... I told my wife she can work if she chooses to, or she can stay at home or do anything she wants. My issue is with some lazy **** pissing away his money on video games and McDonalds and then telling his wife she cannot have a nice ring.
My fiancée's engagement ring and wedding band cost more than either of our modest cars, but she's keeping that ring at least until I die. So that's good enough for me.
If your fiancee/wife actually cares about the size of the diamond you get her, run far far away and never look back.
Sorry, I don't agree with this. It is not a certainty that you are going to lose and if it is then your relationship may be failing at one of the key components of having a relationship or marriage, compromise. You should never be afraid that you're going to lose when you enter into a discussion with your SO, especially about something that has such huge financial ramifications. I think many women out there can see past this if their SO discussed with them instead of spending $20,000 on this ring, let's get you a nice one for less and put the additional money toward our house, a new car, emergency fund, so on and so forth. In fact, one of our good friends did this, although the husband was not trying to talk her out of a diamond. She picked out a ring at Walmart that she liked and used the rest of the money to purchase their first home AND a new vehicle.
^Not every nice ring is gonna cost 20k. If you wanna go to Tiffany's and get it in the rear, be my guest. I understand that you're trying to make a point but it's a bit of an exaggeration. I got mine from Brian Gavin. He also happens to be located in Houston and gave me a hefty discount bc I paid in cash. http://www.briangavindiamonds.com/
I am not talking about a woman demanding a $20,000 ring. I am talking about a woman wanting a diamond engagement ring and a guy with the ability to get her one telling her it is a poor investment and a waste of money and that he will not get her one. A man will lose on that account because women do not want it for investment purposes etc. I think, if you have the means, you are better getting her one... If a woman demands a $20,000 ring then there are probably issues, or if a woman will leave you over the size of her engagement ring... then there are other issues. I am not talking about taxing your finances to a breaking point to get a massive ring while living in an apartment either. You have to be reasonable (and honestly in my experience most grounded women are very reasonable), but to immediately dismiss a diamond engagement ring because it is a rip off in my opinion kind of defeats the purpose....
A couple of people in this thread already pointed out that they spent more on a ring than a car. $20,000 is not an exaggeration unless they're talking about a used Stratus with 200,000 miles on it.
There is a difference when you can afford to do so...... Also, the overwhelming majority of engagement rings are not $20,000. The fact is $20,000 is not the same for everyone. A guy making $150,000 a year buying his wife a $20,000 ring is not the same as a teacher making $45,000 a year buying one.
Just because you have the means doesn't mean you have to either. Better off, debatable. I have the means to by my wife a Cadillac and still live comfortably but if she wanted one I'm not just going to cave in because I have the means. That's foolish and frankly it seems like treating her like a child who wants something to avoid a tantrum if she doesn't get it. I agree there. I'm not talking about dismissing, I am talking about discussing it if you're viewpoints differ from her own. It doesn't necessarily have be about the market being a rip off either, as I stated. Let her know why you wouldn't prefer buying a diamond and listen to her retorts. Maybe she will change her tune if you have compelling reasons against it or maybe she'll present even more compelling reasons to get one. You never know because unlike popular opinion, all women are different.
I realize there is a difference but just because you can afford to do something doesn't mean you should or must do that.
I don't think buying a Cadillac is the same thing as buying an engagement ring, but that is really just a value judgment I make. To someone else, it is the opposite and I appreciate that. Concerning buying a diamond ring. If I know that my woman wants a diamond engagement ring, and I am going to ask her to marry me..... I am getting her a diamond ring, I may not spend $20,000 (you can get them for as little as $1000-$2000), I am going to get her a diamond ring.. I am not going to sit her down and try and talk her out of her preference. I may not get as big of a ring, but I am getting her what she wants... not because I believe she is a child or immature, but because the ring isn't for me, it is for her. Now, if lets say that you are dating and diamonds come up, and you give your opinion, that is fine....... but if I am surprising her with an engagement ring, and she wants a diamond, that is what she is getting.
Yes, yes they have. And they're minnows compared to HP and their monopoly on ink cartridges. You need to investigate further, there's a massive conspiracy out there and you're only focused on the blingiest. No, no they're not. Please, don't get me wrong, I know that I'm hot, but textbook perfection really takes a lot. The whole world needs to open their eyes, and realize, diamonds aren't just, about the size. Why do guys like chicks with nice skin, and really firm butts? It's cause they're fun, not cuz they're sluts. Diamonds shine bright and they're white, just like hot girls, they please the eyes.
And I have no qualms about that, everybody is going to do what they want to do. I just think in you have a differing opinion about it then voice it.
No, no I'm not. I'm aware of HP and ink cartridge rip offs which explains why I do not have a printer in my house. Yeah, no other gemstones do that.
The bottomline, whether it's ruby, topaz, emerald, sapphire, etc... colors just don't look as nice. They come off gimmicky. It's not about how rare it is.
My wife's ring was $500. Lost it 7-8 years ago. Our ten year anniversary is coming up and I asked her if she would like another one. She never wore the first one. She just looked at me like what's wrong with you. Nice!!
Vacation homes - a sham Luxury cars - a sham Spending more than $100 per person on a meal - a sham First class airfare - a sham Anything I can't afford - a sham Sincerely, Poor People
