Chasing your dreams vs. doing what society says you should do?

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/bronnie-ware/top-5-regrets-of-the-dyin_b_1220965.html

#1 and #2 seem most relevant here. In the larger picture, people seem most to regret having picked the safe and comfortable route. Of course, that is easy to say when you pick the safe and comfortable route. But you don't hear a lot of entrepreneurs - even failed ones - saying they regret having gone out on a limb to do something different.

 

Going to agree with most here...

I finished school last May and found a stable 8:30-5:30 career. This provides security/income.

But because I do not want this to be my life for the next 40+ years, I spend my evenings learning guitar, learning spanish, reading, playing xbox, etc. It is definitely tough to maintain a full-day routine for consecutive weeks, but I believe it will pay off. I don't want to be a societal robot who goes to work at day and watches tv at night... rinse/repeat.

 

Screw follow your dreams because dreams keep changing. fbgm.

 

Just ask your dreams where they're going and hook up with them later.

 

It depends on how you look at college education. College institutions were originally made available for people to pursue higher learning of a particular subject.

If you are going to college to just get a degree, I am not a big proponent of that especially if your major is something that you are not passionate about. All your degree will give you is a foot in the door of an employer and start at decent salary. Once you are in, your diploma ain't worth crap as everybody (generally) are in a level playing field. The decision makers don't care if u have a degree or not, just like in basketball, whoever is playing well gets more playing time.

You mentioned that you are currently working. Try to picture your current career and look 4 years in to the future. How much money do you think you will be making then and if possible, would you have been promoted? How much new skills would you have learned? Compare that to what type of salary you will get if you just came out of college and see if it is more advantageous to have a degree. Bear in mind that you will be spending money whilst going to college as oppose to having to earn money and getting more experience.

 

**** all this ****. We all die in the end.

Just live by your rules

Hold your own, know your name, and go your own ****ing way.

Anyways get your your college degree first then the above. good luck

 

Whatever you do, don't do something because its what "society does". That's not a good way to live. Do what makes you feel happy. So many people get caught up n the whole "you have to finish college in 4 yrs or you're a loser" "you have to do it this way only, ect. ect.," that it ruins them.

 

The problem with the "just follow your dreams" statement is that people often misinterpret it to mean "I'll just let life take me wherever and not worry about what's ahead." It doesn't matter which path you want to follow, but you need a plan. Yes, there were successful people like Bill Gates that didn't need a college degree to be successful, but that's because they knew exactly what they were going to do after dropping out.

What you want to ask yourself right now is, "What do I want my standard of life to be like 10 or 20 years down the road? Can I achieve it by doing what I want to do? Is there any way I can plan ahead to make sure I can make it on the path I want to take?"

 

The 'things society tells you to do' are generally just good advice. Usually, when I've strayed from the logical path, I discover that I just took the harder road. If I had just done the obvious thing, I'd have been better off. I've wasted plenty of time re-inventing the wheel.

That doesn't mean not to follow your dreams. You draw a false dichotomy to say these two ideas are in opposition. You can go to college and be a bassist. You can even be a doctor and a bassist. You don't have to quit music to take care of the other things in your life. And to use the 'following my dream' justification to not do the obvious, wise thing is kind of lazy -- intellectually so. Especially when it comes to education. Education is going to make you better at anything you end up doing. You'll be a better musician with one. The obvious thing here is just plain good advice: a college education is good for you. Get it. Play music, become a star, but get a degree too. Don't make life harder than it has to be.

 

Heard that too. Thought it was really a great take

I think pursuing something before school or even taking a short break is somewhat valuable. It allows you to really see the real world and where you fit into it before you take the time to learn about it...basically it can help you focus in on your anticipated field. With that being said though, it's easy to get caught up in the moment and lose that momentum of education. Before you know it, it will be 4 years later and school may not even be an option, e.g. you have a family or a full time job that you can't get away form.

 

Why? For many people, they need or benefit from structure and to know what is next, etc. Nothing at all wrong with that. But for others, they thrive with a "flow with the wind" mentality - this applies to all sorts of people not like Bill Gates: artists, missionaries, entrepreneurs, volunteers, etc.

This is true - but you also want to ask "what would I have to give up or miss out on for the next 20 years to achieve this? And is that worth it?" If you're always working towards the future, it's easy to miss out on a lot of the experience. You don't want to wake up in 20 years and realize you are now where you wanted to be when you thought about this 20 years ago, but it's not where you want to be now, and you missed out on so much for 20 years to get here.

 

Depends on the dream and if and how you pursue it.

Rocket River

 

I dont care what your dream is, can't pursue it if you aint got nothing to eat. finish school, then go pursue your dream. There's nothing you can start at 18 that you cant start at 22.

 

While what I wrote is a blanket statement and doesn't apply to every single person in the world, if you intend to reach and maintain a certain standard of life, then a lack of direction can hinder that goal greatly. If you're okay with having periods in your life where you will not have that standard of life, even possibly throughout the rest of your life, and you're willing to face that, then going with that "flow with the wind" mentality will be fine for you. If you're trying to obtain that standard of life, then you would indeed need a plan, otherwise your chance of obtaining that is very, very slim. Even missionary and volunteer work needs a lot of planning in advance, since there's paperwork to be filled and money that needs to be raised. Programs end, and finding the next program to be a part of takes planning as well.

I didn't list all the questions that OP would need to ask him/herself before embarking on whatever career path he/she wanted to take, so yes, that would be one of the questions to ask. That in itself is planning ahead.

 

Finish school even if you plan to follow your passions eventually.

No one ever said, "I wish I wouldn't have graduated college!"

Lots of people say, "Oh whoa is me, I should have been a Vet instead of a lawyer," or "I ignored my passion for art and got into accounting and now I'm miserable," but they say those things with food in their stomachs and the cushion of a college degree under their ass. Invariably this is a better starting point from which to chase your dreams. If you're truly passionate about music then it won't go away in 3 years when you're done with a bachelors and you'll have a secure place to explore your passions from (assuming you're not talking about racking up $100k in loans going to private school or something). Concurrentally, if you spend 3 years exploring the music business and it doesn't work out, you'll be in the same position you're in right now minus three years of your life.

This is just my experience but college teaches you so much about yourself, what you believe in and how you feel about the world that I wouldn't recommend anyone skip it. With the way highschools are set up as test mills these days, college is really the first time you'll have someone challenge your beliefs/thoughts/abilities etc. So what I'm saying is that it may inspire things in you that even music can't. I know I benefitted from that but others may not have the same experience.

Anyway, good luck with your choice man. Not like your life depends on it or anything! >___>

 

Exactly; the first thing should be making sure you have a way to support yourself. Getting performing musician gigs will probably most realistically be a little nice side income and not anything you could live off of. Not saying you can't get where you live off of it completely - you might - but you need a backup plan and something to take care of you while you're getting to that point.

This may or may not involve college. If you have a job/job opportunity now which you can live with as a career if need be (or work your way up in) and which does not require finishing college, then don't. But find some sort of realistic career pathway plan - that you think you could live with and that is hiring decently right now - and work toward it. If that means finishing college with a useful major, then do it. Otherwise you have nothing to live off of, except for trying to live off other people.

As a bass guitar player, at least you have a good shot at getting night/weekend gigs so you don't have to completely give it up.

[I made a mixture of good and bad decisions as I struggled with the dream vs. realistic career thing for years - did the realistic career thing like a good girl first, then spent a lot of money pursuing the dream, then got smart and ditched it but wish I wasn't still paying the money back. At least I had a career already. Part of it is because I am a classical type musician and there are very few opportunities for adults in that field who wish to grow, perform, and challenge themselves as musicians, except for those who are already affiliated with a full-time music or music teaching job. Sigh... I'd gladly pay money to join a percussion ensemble, classical choir, whatever and perform free concerts - but that tends to be something people work on for years and then drop entirely after college. ]