How long do most wait after a breakup before having sex with someone new?

never. celibacy is the way to go. b****es be crazy.

 

Depends if you have a backup.

 

30 minutes

no, seriously. who cares? bang the next chick you can. why wouldn't you? maybe because you would feel bad for your ex? that doesnt make sense, since I'm pretty sure it was a bad breakup. go balls out. screw anything that walks.

 

as soon as possible.

 

((2X + 3)/2)2
X = Number of months in relationship
Y = Number of days to wait


btw, that's a superscript...

 

Crap, I checked my notes, it's hours not days...thank god.

 

why wait?

 

Well, some partners are more aware of others' feelings. She probably just thinks that if you're both "free" then it's just as easy for you to meet someone as it is for her. That's obviously not always the case and can feel like a real punch in the gut -- a sense of worthlessness -- if the other party gets the opportunity and you don't.

Jealousy may play a factor, but that really isn't the full feeling.

I'm in sort of a similar situation with a chick who I presumed, at first, was just a hookup, but she's now madly in love with me. Realistically, though, I don't see it lasting (I'm always a long term thinker, even if it means I may be shooting myself in the foot), mainly for geographic and religious reasons.

Geography can be overcome. Religion...not so much, unless you're willing to deal with constant judgment and frustration from other family members (especially those who are more devout in their beliefs).

Of course religion only really factors when it comes to children, which I'm sure you're aware of.

My question would be: how about no religion? Has that been discussed?

What I can suggest is that from my experience, there is certain things which would be up for compromise, but I would be pretty uncomfortable for a child of mine to be more exposed to/identified with one set of beliefs that I think are silly.

The compromise is: I'm perfectly fine giving my religious beliefs up if the other party is. Otherwise, no go.

 

Oh and to answer your initial question...yeah, why wait? If she is going out and mingling, then you should too. It's unhealthy to sit and ruminate.

Furthermore, perhaps a reason why you are hesitant is that you are holding out hope that both of you will either stay together, or at least refrain from hooking up with other people...together.

This is beyond your control.

I would definitely think your mindset would be better if you KNEW the next hookup/opportunity. It's the uncertainty and the unknown of who and when that can be really depressing.

 

Don't let her have her cake and eat it too. You have to stop talking to her. Don't hang out with her, don't log into her FB or anything. You must have a clean break. This is the best way to get over her as time will heal. Every time you talk to her, you're just playing with your own emotions.

As far as your original question. You will know when you're ready to start dating/hooking up again. Once you get over her and start thinking about yourself, the switch in your head will go off.

Work out, hang out with friends and family and just focus on you. Tell your mutual friends not to talk about her to you.

 

Make sure you tell her u love her before she spends the night with the guy.

Anything to keep her from sleeping with him bc then that'll be the point of no return.

 

this is what both of you need.

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as soon as possible under 2 conditions

1. you dont get yourself a std
2. you don't stick your dick in crazy

 

I think it's all depends per person/situation/context..

I've been in a situation where sex turned out to be very therapeutic in getting over someone I lost. Maybe it was a mixture of emotions and sex was the only way to churn those emotions into something I could stomach...But, Perhaps this could be her last ditch option to turn to??

Your story sounds like a real tragedy in that, really the only things that kept you two from journeying further is something ultimately outside of yours and her power... It's very Romeo and Juliet-like.

At the same time, (in an extreme example) if someone who lost someone in the Aurora shooting brooded over it to themselves in a dark room for 30-40 days, chances are their sadness will only worsen and refuse to fade. But if they leave the house, get fresh air, keep them close to heart but not dwell for that same 30-40 day window - chances are they'll have more room to grow and be able to move on.

My point, I'd tell her that you two need to completely cut ties for a while and let these roll-over emotions subside. I mean 30-40 days of still exchanging sentimental thoughts with each other after a 5 year relay certainly won't help either of you fully continue going forward in separate paths.

I feel for you, man. I hope you both find happiness.

 

ummm....i would say 20 hours. 24 hours is too long.

 

When you feel the time is right. Every situation is different. Don't rush into anything that you might regret.

 

You should have no time limit.

Your ex should wait until you get married to someone else.