Ettiquette Question: Divorce - Congrats or Condolences?

Obviously everyone who is single is going to say congrats and everyone who is married is going to give condolences.

 

This is the correct answer.

 

Donny, you have a girlfriend?

 

I've re-married and if it's a bud of mine, I'd still give congrats. Only cause I've been through it before already and once it's over it's such a relief.

 

Congratualtions. There are only one of two narratives playing in the divorcee's head: 1. my life sucks and is better with her or 2. my life is better without her. Even if they are stuck bemoaning number 1, better to let them know the world is buying into the latter and doing so optimistically, to encourage them to do the same, than supporting the hopeless dream of 'un-divorce.'

 

Are you talking about the divorce or the marriage itself?

 

I usually conglomerate the two, cover my bases.

"Ahhhh, well, hate to hear plans for eternal bliss coming to an end, but maybe it was meant to be that way and this is how things will turn out for the best in the long run."

or some tripe like that.

 

Both...I've been happily divorced for about 7 years and at first, your're right, no one really knows how to respond...similar to someone being let go from work..

High Five!!

 

I come across the same dilemma when someone tells me they're having a baby.

 

The correct answer.