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What's the most horrible/messed up joke you know.

Discussion in 'BBS Hangout' started by Aggie2012, Dec 6, 2011.

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  1. Royals Ego

    Royals Ego Member

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    What do you call a woman with 1 leg?
    Ilene
    What do you call a Chinese woman with 1 leg?
    Irene
     
  2. Dubious

    Dubious Member

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    Lance and Bruce are laying in bed one night, when Lance says," my butt really itches, will you scratch it for me?"

    Oh Ok, roll over.

    It really itches, but deeper.

    Deeper?

    Yeah deeper.

    Wait, there's something in there.

    It's a watch. A Rolex!

    Happy Birthday!
     
  3. LAFIRMA22

    LAFIRMA22 Member

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    Floyd Mayweather Argues With Radio Host Rude Jude

    <iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/ML1fd8UBnXE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
     
  4. Jugdish

    Jugdish Member

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    The English composition book in my freshman year of college had a joke Stephen King heard from a nine-year-old:

    What's the difference between a truck bed full of bowling balls and a truck bed full of dead babies?

    You can't unload the bowling balls with a pitchfork.

    Not the most shocking joke, but it was weird to read it in a textbook.
     
  5. javal_lon

    javal_lon Member

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    There was an Asian, Arab, White, and Black man on top of a mountain.. They each talked about sacrificing themselfves for their people... the Asian said "This is for my people" and jumped.. The Arab jumped and said "this is for my people... The black stepped up, looked down and said "this is for my people".. and pushed the white man off!!!!

    Works any combination you desire... For any race

    Same circumstance... First,the Arab opened his jacket (revealing a bomb jacket).. The other 3 guys looked at each other and jumped off... The Arab laughed and said "That was for my people"..... He forgot how to defuse it however, and before it went off he said "Well damn, I guess this really was for my people"....
     
  6. Pete the Cheat

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    Where did the general put his armies?
    <spoiler> in his sleevies! </spoiler>
     
  7. QdoubleA

    QdoubleA Member

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    So tell me what’s worse than a baby?

    A dead baby…

    Well then what’s worse than a dead baby?

    A pile of dead babies…

    And what’s worse than a pile of dead babies?

    A live baby under a pile of dead babies

    And what’s worse than a live baby under a pile of dead babies?

    A live baby eating it’s way out of a pile of dead babies…

    Whats worse than a live baby eating it's way out of a pile of dead babies?

    He likes it.
     
  8. CCorn

    CCorn Member

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    So are we just doing horrible jokes now?

    What's brown and sticky
    a stick

    Whats green and has wheels
    grass, I was just kidding about the wheels
     
  9. firecat

    firecat Member

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    If Chuck Norris and The Most Interesting Man in the World (from the Dos XX commercials) get in a fight to the death, which one will be victorious?

    Tim Tebow - He just wins!
     
  10. Ubigman

    Ubigman Member

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    whats 2+13?

    15
     
  11. Supermac34

    Supermac34 President, Von Wafer Fan Club

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    What's the difference between a Snowman and a Snowwoman?


    Snow Balls
     
  12. Apps

    Apps Member

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    What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple! :)

























    The Holocaust. :eek:
     
  13. Dubious

    Dubious Member

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  14. ima_drummer2k

    ima_drummer2k Member

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    Yeah, why did I literally laugh out loud when I read that? What's wrong with me??
     
  15. bejezuz

    bejezuz Member

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    The following are being posted for illustrative purposes and do not represent the views or beliefs of this poster or forum:

    CAUTION! This joke is racist. Do not click if you are easily offended.

    What did Hitler say to the black Jew?

    Get to the back of the oven!

    Wow, that was bad.

    Still not offended? The next joke is guaranteed to offend over half of all people:

    What do you call all that useless flesh around a vagina?

    A woman!
     
  16. TexasStake

    TexasStake Member

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    Shrimp is that you?
     
  17. deadlybulb

    deadlybulb Member

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    This is from Glibert Gottfried.

    A woman gets into a really bad car accident. The husband rushes from work over to the hospital. The doctor comes out, he goes, 'Sorry, it's really bad news. Your wife was in a horrible car accident. Her face and body are totally mangled; she'll be crippled and paralyzed from the neck down. She's going to need 24-hour care, of which your insurance is not going to pay for. You're going to have to wash her and feed her and keep turning her over in case she gets bed sores and rubbing ointment on her. You'll have to change her pretty constantly 'cause she'll have no control over her bladder or bowels. And the man breaks down crying. And the doctor goes, 'I'm just f**king with you. She's dead.'
     
    1 person likes this.
  18. cardpire

    cardpire Member

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    Bob .
     
  19. SwoLy-D

    SwoLy-D Member

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    Good work, Iago. In a scale of 1-10, YOU are an 11! :eek:

    Sincerely,
    Jafar
     
  20. Yung-T

    Yung-T Member

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    Man I laughed so loud my father came in and asked what happened. It'S plain wrong though.:grin:
     

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